Page 69 of Little Psycho

Feeling her eyes on me, scanning all the marks, I begin to grow uneasy, feeling like the little vulnerability I do have is showing.

“What happened, Ash?”she finally asks, putting her hand on my knee and giving it a gentle squeeze.“Did your father do that?”

Sliding my hand into my pants pocket, I pull out the baggie of coke, just wanting to get high, mainly to numb the physical and emotional pain, but also just to forget about everything that happened tonight.But I can’t fucking forget.

“Want a line?”I ask, holding out the straw to her after I’ve sniffed my first couple lines, completely avoiding her question.

She sighs, looking torn, making me wonder why all of a sudden.“I shouldn’t since I just took all of my meds and a few extra painkillers.I’m not a fan of speedballing.”Her eyes lock onto the straw, and her tongue darts out involuntarily to lick her lips.

“Meds?Why are you on medication?What did they diagnose you with?”I regret asking the moment the words leave my lips, especially when I see the look of shame that briefly flashes in her dull-blue eyes.

“Fuck it,” she laughs mockingly, eventually snatching the straw out of my hand, rolling her gorgeous eyes.“It would be easier to tell you what I’m not diagnosed with, Ash.Being held captive for so fucking long does something to a person’s mind, completely altering their mentality.”She sniffs the fatter line out of the three cut up on the coffee table, instantly rubbing her nose.And then she looks at me, keeping her hand on my knee but now tightly gripping it.“I don’t trust our family doctor, since he was known for coming to my parents rescue and keeping quiet about a lot, but he slapped me with severe anxiety, bipolar with schizophrenic behaviors, manic depression with delusional tendencies, OCD, ADHD, and a few others that are almost impossible to pronounce.I’m basically crazy, for short.I told you I was, Ash.I wasn’t given the nickname Little Psycho for nothing.”

“Fuck, I’m sorry, Calista.I didn’t know.”I hang my head in regret, trying to ignore the mixed look of shame and embarrassment on her face.

“It’s not your fault,” she says, her forced smile slowly fading.

“Marcus Rutherford,” I blurt out, figuring she deserves to know something since she just opened up to me.But the look she gives me fucking terrifies me, and I find myself stumbling over my words.

“What the fuck did you just say?”Her jaw clenches, defining her cheekbones but showing off the extreme look of hatred and anger from hearing the name.

“Wh… what’s that look for?”I ask nervously, subtly inching closer to her, desperately fiending for her warmth but too afraid to divulge into my desires.

“Did you say Marcus Rutherford?As in councilman Marcus Rutherford?”She speaks through gritted teeth and freezes, and her grip on my knee gets even tighter as the color drains from her face.

“Yeah, the very same.Why?”I ask, not sure if I want to know the answer or not.

“He’s on my list, Ash.”She smirks now, the deadly twist of her plump lips giving me an unsettling chill.“Tell me what that motherfucker did to you, baby boy,” she purrs, making me feel some type of way that I’ve never felt before.“Tell me so I can make it all better for you.”

“I hate talking about that shit, Cali.Just know that my father wasn’t the only one to leave these fucking marks all over me.”I shudder just thinking about what happened hours earlier, trying hard to force down the bile rising in my throat.

She nods, accepting my vague answer, and reaches into her backpack near her feet.Pulling something out, she slaps a piece of paper on the table and removes her hand so I can see what’s on it.Following her finger, my eyes dart to where she’s pointing, and sure enough, the name Marcus Rutherford is scribbled toward the bottom, right above a few names already crossed off and below a bunch of names that aren’t.

She’s got a fucking hitlist.No lie, she legit has a fucking hit list with about 13 names on it.

I try to scan the list to find out the other names, but she quickly shoves it into her backpack before I can make any of them out.

“You’ve got a score to settle with him too, huh?”I joke, slightly bumping her shoulder with mine to try and lighten the mood and ease the thick tension floating between us.

“You have no fucking idea.He won the bid at my birthday a couple years back, and I was forced to spend a weekend with him alone while he did anything and everything he wanted to me.He fucking destroyed me, Ash, and did some of the most fucking disturbing things to me that I can’t even repeat without having a fucking panic attack.”I can hear the sadness in her voice as she recalls the graphic details of the pain he inflicted on her, but she quickly recovers with another devilish grin that, no lie, makes my fucking cock hard and my blood run cold.

I can tell that she doesn’t like to be vulnerable.She doesn’t allow herself to feel sorry for her situation and she sure as fuck doesn’t want anyone else to feel sorry for her.But I do.I can’t fucking help it.I just want to hold her tightly and shower her with love, but she doesn’t seem like the type who likes to be held, and I completely understand why.

As the silence stretches between us, my heart races, splitting my focus between her and the dread quietly simmering in the back of my mind.Calista’s resolve is palpable, and it pulls me in like a moth to a flickering flame.

“What's your plan?”I finally ask, betraying a hint of curiosity.“I can tell you have one; otherwise, you wouldn’t have a fucking hit list.”

Her eyes flash, and there’s a mix of pain and determination in them.“I have to do this, Ash.There’s no choice.I can’t keep living in the shadows of what they did to me.The only way to reclaim my life is to confront them—everyoneon that list has to fucking pay.”She emphasizes the word everyone, making me think there’s names on her list that I’m not going to like.

I shift on the couch, torn between admiration for her strength and fear for her safety.“And what about you?What happens after?You think revenge will magically fix everything?”I can’t help picturing the shattered girl who was once my best friend, laughing and carefree.

My mind flickers back to those innocent moments, starkly contrasting the dangerous path she seems hell bent on pursuing.

Calista shrugs, her demeanor sliding back into defiance.“What’s the alternative?Allow them to keep living their lives like nothing fucking happened?Let them continue to hurt others the way they hurt me?That isn’t justice, Ash.I need to see them fucking suffer the way we have.”

“But you’ll only be hurting yourself in the process.You don’t have to do this shit alone, you know.”The truth drips from my voice, cutting through the tension.

She looks away, her brow furrowing in frustration.“You’ve seen what they can do, Ash.I can’t trust anyone in this fucking world—not even you.This is something Ihaveto handle myself.”