Page 67 of Karma

Karma crosses her arms even tighter around her chest and glares at me. “We’re not gonna be a part of torturing and killing of women. How can you be on board with this?”

She glances at my wrists and I fight the urge to hide my hands behind my back.

“What do you mean?”

I know what she means. But my other options here are either to talk about my worst memories some more or storm out and end this conversation that way. Both of those options are shit. The trip down memory lane got a little easier since I shared it with them and I don’t want to spoil that. And I need them with me when we leave here because I don’t think I can actually, physically leave them behind. If they don’t agree to come, I might just stay with them, and that won’t do at all.

Honesty it is then. It’ll probably take no less than that to wipe that angry glare off Karma’s face.

I sit back down on the bed and run my fingers through my hair. Then I glance at both of them, and look out the window, at the trees I know are there in the darkness. Trees hiding the campsite where so much changed. I want to visit that place with them again. And all other places.

“I don’t like Joker’s plan any more than you do,” I say. “But he came up with it for me… because of what happened to me after the Devils killed my family.”

The silence that follows my words is as thick as a wall.

Finally, Karma clears her throat and it sounds like bricks cracking. “Tell Joker you don’t want that kind of revenge then. He’ll listen to you.”

I shrug. “It’s a good plan. It’ll hurt the Devils in ways just war and death never could.”

Losing one of their most precious daughters will destroy them. And they have no hope of finding her after we snatch her. Because the place we’re taking her to doesn’t exist on any map.

“But she’s innocent,” Karma says, her voice taking on a pleading tone, all anger gone. She walks over to me, the floorboards creaking under her boots, the dust she’s raising making my nose itch. “She didn’t do anything to you. She’s not the reason for all the bad things that happened to you.”

Grim has gone completely silent and still again. But I won’t make the mistake of thinking that means he’s seeing things from my point of view.

“I was innocent too,” I say. “I was five years old when they killed my father and older brothers. Joker was six when they killed his mom and dad right in front of him. They were willing to sacrifice us to get their revenge. This is just giving them a taste of their own medicine. That’s how I see it, anyway.”

Karma sits down next to me, so I got one to either side of me now. She takes my hand, has to pull hard to get to it, because I was clutching my palms together hard and didn’t even know it.

“You don’t see it that way. You know it’s wrong,” she insists. But she’s wrong.

Sometimes I don’t see it that way. Sometimes I do. And the sum total of that has been that I haven’t mentioned any of it to Joker. I’ve just let him get on with the plan.

“Lots of things are wrong,” I say. “It was wrong for us to have to pay for the sins of our fathers. It was wrong that my father’s whore decided to try and raise me… she should’ve just left me in some orphanage. I was a cute kid… someone would’ve adopted me and I probably wouldn’t have remembered anything about my past.”

“Or she was right to do it,” Grim says.

“Sure, maybe,” I say. “At least she taught me how to survive on my own. And she’s about to get her revenge for the thing that destroyed her life too, even though she did nothing to deserve it. She probably wouldn’t have gotten beaten to death by some john if the Devils hadn’t killed my father and all the other men ofSatan’s Spawn MC. So you could say she was innocent in all this too.”

Karma and Grim are both very quiet. If Karma wasn’t still holding my hand I’d think they were both gone. They probably already are. Checked out. Don’t want anything to do with me or any of this.

“And we all deserve our revenge. Just like Ice and the Devils deserved it against our families. Just like you two deserved it against the ones who killed Reaper.”

Karma inhales sharply and Grim seems to be holding his breath. Maybe I finally said the right thing.

“Those guys had families too,” I add just to drive the point home. “So you could say their kids will deserve to get their revenge on you too. If they want it.”

Karma squeezes my hand tighter and that’s the only response I get. Check mate, I guess. Or whatever that position in chess is called where there are no good moves left, but you’re not defeated yet. This is worse than being defeated, so I understand their silence.

Grim slides closer to me, putting his arm around my shoulders. Maybe it’s not worse. As long as you’re still kicking there’s hope.

“You’ve given this a lot of thought,” he says and I nod, leaning on him while I still can.

“There’s no good answers,” I say. “But I can tell you that Joker cares about this woman. And as soon as he realizes it, he won’t be able to hurt her. I think he probably already knows that.”

Whether he can stop the others from doing it is another matter though. Every last member of our MC has an axe to grind with the Devils and they’ll all want a piece of Eden to get it done. But we can figure that out when we get to it.

Karma interlaces her fingers with mine. “I never saw it that way. But I still hate it. I hope you’re right about Joker.”

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