Page 95 of Ruthless Lullaby

My friend comes in to embrace me with a comforting hug. "Of course it does, babe," she says. "Still, you did the right thing by leaving him. That was the only sensible thing to do after this."

I really want to cry now. I try convincing myself that Betty is right, but the tears flowing down my face suggest otherwise.

"Ssshh. I’m here for you, girl,” Betty continues to comfort me. “I’ll help you get through this, I promise." she lets go of ourembrace and looks at me with concern. "What's your plan now?" she asks.

"Take one step at a time,” I answer with an exasperated sigh. “And even if by some miracle I'm pregnant, there's no chance I'll be able to carry the baby to term. According to the doctors I’ve seen, my body wouldn’t be able to handle it.”

Betty lets out a sigh. "Too bad, babe. You would make a wonderful mother." She gently pats my cheek. “But now, let’s go buy you a pregnancy test.”

Chapter Thirty-Six

Mindy

The next morning, I wake up feeling like death warmed over.

Just like yesterday, my stomach churns, and I barely make it to the bathroom before I'm hunched over the toilet, retching and heaving until there's nothing left to bring up.

Rise and shine, Mindy!

I'm starting to think that Betty is right about the pregnancy but I still can't wrap my head around it.I didn’t want to buy the test yesterday, but she practically forced me to go to the drugstore with her. Later on, she had to go out and I ended up sleeping through the afternoon, leaving the test in my bag. I didn’t even take it.

But today, I can no longer delay the inevitable. I promised Betty to get it done by the time she’s back. But first things first, I’m going to procrastinate a little more by treating myself with breakfast at my local coffee shop.

Eating out is highly unusual for me, especially for breakfast. My usual morning meal is just a sad piece of toast with jam. But today, I feel like I could kill for a delicious plate of eggs with bacon. I quickly wash my face, throw on some clothes, and head down to the small joint nearby.

And as soon as I step inside, the smell of fresh coffee beans hits me and it's like heaven in my nostrils. Which is strange, because yesterday the mere thought of coffee made me want to puke. Now it's like a warm hug.

I'm so hungry, I could eat a horse. So, I order a cappuccino and a hearty breakfast - omelette with bacon, two slices of toast, a side salad - and settle into a booth by the window.

As I dig into my food and savor the flavors, I feel a sense of calm wash over me. For a moment, I almost forget about the test waiting for me at home.

"Can I sit here?" A familiar voice cuts through my reverie, making me look up. My heart skips a beat in my chest. It's Maurice.

To my surprise, Maurice looks better than I've ever seen him. His hair is neatly trimmed and styled, his clothes are clean and pressed. There's a clarity in his eyes that I haven't seen in a long time. If I didn’t know better, I would mistake it for a sense of purpose or determination.

He stands beside my table with a tray of food in his hands and a vibrant smile on his face.

"Maurice," I say with a half grin, my mind still reeling from the surprise. The last time I saw him was at Maron's birthday party, causing a huge scene and being completely drunk. "Sure, take a seat."What is he doing here? And why now, of all times?

"Thanks, Mindy," he says, sliding into the seat across from me. "I hope I'm not interrupting anything. I just saw you sitting here and... well, I thought I’d come say hi."

I shake my head, gesturing for him to sit down. “No, it's fine. I’m just grabbing a bite before, um…”peeing on a test to seeif I'm pregnant from your brother!“…before heading home,” I add.

Maurice nods, digging into his own breakfast with gusto. "Well, I’m glad I bumped into you. Breakfast tastes better with good company."

I nod, giving him a smile. "Yeah, I know what you mean."

We sit in silence as we eat, and I’m starting to feel a little awkward. Sure, it’s nice to see Maurice, especially in such good shape. But at the same time, I’m increasingly anxious about the task that awaits me.

What if it comes back positive?

Cut it out Mindy, you can’t get pregnant!

It's so frustrating when my mind goes off on a tangent like this. Maybe I should have just stayed home and gotten that damn test done. It would all be over by now. It would have come back negative, and my worries would have evaporated. Instead, I’m sitting here with my ex, not sure what to talk about.

As if he can read my thoughts, Maurice places his fork down and meets my eyes. He clears his throat before speaking. "Mindy, I want to apologize."

His sudden confession catches me off guard. "Apologize? For what?"