Page 33 of A Very Addicted Christmas

Cold nips my skin as I hustle out the doors. For the briefest second, I bypass Beckett—my shoulder almost brushes against his chest—and I feel his eyes grazing against me. But I don’t stop and check.

He doesn’t call my name.

Doesn’t call me back.

My insides feel like cement. In time, maybe the uncomfortable feelings of what happened will just pass like a faded memory. And it won’t hurt anymore.

I turn on the ignition to a blue van for Sulli and Luna. “It’s fucking freezing,” Sulli says loudly as she slips inside behind Luna.

Then, I start cracking the ice off the windshield. When I go to the rear windshield and break up more ice, I hear a couple voices.

“Quinn!” Joana shouts.

I swing my head in the direction of the pub. She’s dragging a fuming Quinn back from Oscar.

“Youforcedme here,” Beckett sneers at someone, but I’m not in view of whoever he’s angry at. Maybe Charlie or Moffy. Jane is too drunk for him to pick a fight with.

And before I can consider coming in as back-up, O’Malley steps right in front of me. Exhaust gurgles out of the pipes, and my hot breath already smokes the air.

His lips curve upward. He looks around. Probably for Farrow. Confidence puffs out his chest when he realizes I’m alone.

It’s just me behind this vehicle.

I’m glaring and maybe I should be glad that he just cuts to the chase when he says, “Hey, I heard your dad is being let out of prison this week.”

Why do you care?

I swallow something sharp. It’s hard taking shit from O’Malley. I hate when he brings up my family like he can say whatever he wants without consequence.He’s just trying to get under my skin.

I know that.

I hate that it’s working.

So I try to stay calm, but I’m vibrating inside with frustrations and raw anger.

“Yeah, he’s getting let out,” I tell him.

“Yeah?” O’Malley cocks his head, and I sense what’s coming. “Looks like you’re missing yourmeth-headfamily reunion?—”

I tackle him to the ground, and O’Malley lets out a heavy grunt. Red-hot fury bleeds through me, and I lift a fist just as a pair of hands wrenches me off O’Malley.

“Donnelly,” Akara whispers forcefully in part concern, part warning.

I shrug him off me and immediately spin on my heels. Turning away from O’Malley, from Akara, and just walking away, back towards the closed pub.

Just to cool off.

I stare up at the night sky with burning eyes.

He’s getting let out of prison.When I go home to Philly, my dad will be there, and I don’t know if I want to go back. I pinch my eyes, then sniff hard and stuff my hands in my jacket, fumbling around for my phone.

I fit earbuds in my ears, and without thinking much, I scroll through a playlist and my finger hovers over a song I heard in the pub tonight.

The Who.I press play and picture Luna singing with me. My lips quirk, and my lungs relax for a second. Instinctively, I glance back at the blue van where Luna and Sulli are waiting. The windows are tinted, so I can’t see her.

She’s just in my head. A recent memory—one that I don’t want to fade.

“Make-Believe,” I mutter in the cold. And I wonder if that’s her and me.

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