Page 33 of Sweet Little Thing

She glanced down at her feet and laughed. “Thanks. . .I think. . .I guess.”

“Sit. I’ll fix you something to eat.”

Beulah’s chin snapped level, and she looked at me with wide, wondering eyes. “You can’t fix me food.”

I replied, “I’m the boss. I can do whatever I want. And I want to fix you breakfast. Wait over there.”

The soft smile on her face should have scared me. It should have been a warning. But I wanted it. Wanted her. I didn’t give a fuck about the situation.

“Okay, if you’re sure,” she said, crossing the floor to sit on a bar stool and wait.

“Did you sleep well?” I asked, not sure what she liked to eat. I prepared her a plate like mine, hoping that was good enough.

“Yes, thank you, and for the shoes and socks. I should’vebought some way before now.”

The uniform was Portia’s doing. She should have supplied shoes that fit correctly. Though I didn’t point that out. Not wanting to talk about Portia. She wasn’t here, and for once, I could say I was at peace being home.

“How’s Heidi?” I asked instead.

“Better! I talked to her yesterday. She feels good and was cleared to go to the craft room. That’s all she could talk about. Well, that, and she asked if I could bring cupcakes on Sunday.”

The love in her voice was real. That was what I imagined families should be like. I was an only child, and my parents were never around when I was growing up. My friends all had similar lives. But what Beulah had was what I truly wanted as a kid but never received that unconditional love feeling—the one she got from Heidi and her mother.

“What was your mother like?” I asked before I thought that through. She may not be ready to talk about her mother yet. “I’m sorry, I didn’t think before I spoke. You’re. . .well. . .I just thought. . .was wondering. . .if she looked like you?”

She smiled. It was sad but soft. Her eyes held memories I would never know. They were good ones, though. I could tell. And I admit I was envious. Even if she’d had to suffer the pain of that tragic loss, Beulah cherished the time she had.

“She was amazing. I’m not saying that because she’s gone. If she were still here, I’d say the same thing. Momma worked so hard our entire lives but somehow managed to cook family dinners, and we always ate together. When we were old enough to stand on chairs, she let us cook and help clean the dishes. Heidi washed the vegetables and put the noodles on to boil. Momma never pretended she was different. I don’t think Heidi knew she was until she started school. Even though she had to take care of Heidi, Momma made me feel just as special. I don’t know how she managed to do it all alone. I have memoriesof lemonade popsicles on cloudless, hot summer days. Outside with the sprinkler, and though I don’t think she slept, Momma always had time and a smile. I never once saw her sad. She cried at my high school graduation. But said they were ‘happy tears.’ She was the world’s best mother.”

Beulah’s eyes glowed with love as she spoke. I was almost jealous of her life. Of a mom like that. It explained a lot about her. I’d never met a girl like her because I didn’t know one with a life like Beulah’s.

“She sounds perfect,” I replied.

“She was. . .and thanks for asking. I miss talking about her. I think about her all the time. But I never get to talk about her. I’m afraid it will upset Heidi. She doesn’t understand completely, and Heidi misses her. . . it felt good to remember her. She deserves to be remembered.”

The collected tears that hadn’t fallen in her eyes sat above a wobbly smile. Again, without thinking, I impulsively reacted. I pulled Beulah into my arms and held her tightly, wanting to block out all the things that brought her sadness. She willingly came, her arms wrapped around me, as she laid her head on my chest. Nothing had ever felt this right. The missing piece I was always searching for suddenly clicked into place.

Chapter

Twenty-Five

Beulah

I had made a mistake.

Jasper hugged me, moved back, and released me. He said he needed to be somewhere and left. No other explanation. He had just bolted as if he couldn’t get away fast enough. Was I not supposed to hug him back? I wasn’t sure. Talking to him about Momma made me feel vulnerable. I’d shared with Jasper not only Heidi but now some recollections about my mother. It felt good to be held, to not feel alone.

Maybe I had hugged him too tightly. I had appeared too needy.

I stood there, unsure what to think or do, for a few nervous minutes, and then I cleaned the kitchen. Putting on my new shoes, I rotated my ankles and was shocked at how good they felt. It was time to go see Heidi. I had her to look forward to today. Thinking about Jasper would only ruin my mood..

While I was unlocking my car, Stone pulled into the drive. His black Range Rover fit him. It had that moody, dark andexpensive look. I didn’t wait to speak. He wasn’t one to converse with me unless he needed me to do something. Or to warn me to stay in my place.

I quickly put the cupcakes and other treats I’d chosen for Heidi and May into the back seat. Before I could climb inside my car, Stone spoke, and I immediately stilled. “ Not working today?” he asked.

I sighed. As if that was his business. “It’s Sunday. My day off.”

“You got last night off.”

---