Page 138 of Sweet Little Thing

“Sending someone else to take care of the woman carrying your child that she believes you don’t want—and you called a mistake—has to be the biggest jackass move of your life.”

As if someone had released a dam, the surge hit me so hard it took my breath. Everything that had happened, the answers to why, what I had done, all of it crashed over me.

“Do you hear me, you cold motherfucker? She’s pregnant. She’s not running from you. She left to protect her baby, whom she thinks you don’t want. That’s what I am dealing with here. I had to pull over while she vomited on the side of the interstate. I had to force her to let me pay for her meal so she’d eat more than a damn salad, and I had to threaten her with tellingyouto get her to stay in a hotel tonight. Because she’s slept in her CAR at a fucking SERVICE STATION for the past two nights. Is this all sinking in?”

Horror, anguish, complete and utter panic, didn’t begin to describe what I was feeling. “Where is she?” I asked as my chest constricted from the weight of what I’d done.

“I’ll text you the location of the hotel I am taking her to. If you don’t show up, I’ll step in. I’ll be what she needs, and in time, she’ll love me again. This is my peace offering. Come get her if she and your baby are what you want. If you think you can’t be a father, let me be one. I had a shit example too, but because of it, I know what not to do. And so the fuck do you.”

He promptly ended the call.

I ordered a private plane without contacting my lawyers, without thinking about my next steps with my father—that would have to wait. Finding Beulah and getting her home wouldn’t.

During the flight here, I’d replayed all the words I’d said that last night we’d been together. I remembered how I had gone onand on about us not having a baby. How getting her pregnant would be a mistake I didn’t want. Each fucking memory was like a knife stabbing me in the heart. To think she had stood there and listened to me, knowing our child was already growing inside her. Knowing how much my words hurt her was a vice around my lungs. It was painful to breathe. Every second I was away from her she was thinking I didn’t want her or our baby.

My perfect girl hadn’t said a word. She hadn’t cried. She’d held it all in. Because she had grown accustomed to defeat. Having her life turned upside down just when she thought she had found something secure.

I texted Jasper. “What room number?”

He didn’t respond, so I stood there waiting. Just when I was ready to walk inside and demand to know where she was, Jasper appeared. He walked out the front entrance and came toward me—a scowl on his face. I thought I was about to get another dressing down about how I had failed the woman we both loved. But that wasn’t it…

“What I did before, it was wrong. I was hurt and bitter, and I was desperate to win her back. But I lost something else. Something I hadn’t realized that was more important—my best friend. The only real family I have. This,” he said, pointing back at the hotel. “This is me asking for forgiveness. I was tempted to keep her secret. To be the man she needed. To be the hero. But I couldn’t.”

His apology was unexpected. Jasper was the one person I knew about as well as I knew myself. We were different, but we’d both lived similar childhoods. We had made it through tough times, depending on each other. And he wasn’t being completely honest right now.

“You called me because you love her. It wasn’t all about me. Or us. It was about her, too. You chose what you knew would make her happy instead of what you wanted.”

He chuckled softly, but there was no humor in it. “Maybe.”

I held out my hand, and he looked at it for a moment, as if unsure what to do. Finally he took my hand with a solid shake, and then he stepped forward and hugged me briefly.

“Room 202. Here’s the extra key. Go fix your fucking disaster. And next time, think before you go rambling off at the mouth.”

I took the key. “Thanks.”

Jasper nodded, turned, and walked toward the parking lot.

“Where are you going?” I asked, knowing he had no car here.

“I had a rental sent here after I called you. I knew you’d show up, and I want to continue my road trip.”

I watched him walk away before heading inside. We weren’t what we had once been, but that was the first of our mending the damage done. One day, I knew we would have that again. It would be when I knew he wasn’t looking at my wife wanting her. He’d have to find his own happiness first. I was only so understanding.

Heading to the entrance, I held the key in my hand, and my steps grew longer as my pace quickened. The need to see her was pounding inside my chest and I wanted to break into a run. I wanted to hold her and reassure myself she was safe. I walked past the elevator taking the stairway as I gave in to my need to run, and I was outside her door within minutes.

Taking the key, I tapped the lock and was relieved when the red light didn’t flash because she had bolted it. Knocking on her door would have been more difficult. If the lock had been engaged, there was a good chance she wouldn’t wake up, and I’d have to sit out here until morning to see her.

Stepping into the dark room, I closed the door quietly behind me. I turned on the bathroom light and cracked the door to give me some visibility. When she opened her eyes, she needed to see my face, so she didn’t think a stranger was in here with her.

She was curled up in the middle of a king size bed. I could seeher pink pajamas peeking through the little bit of her that wasn’t covered up. She seemed so fragile right now. I wanted to carry her around in bubble wrap and keep her safe from the world. Keep them both safe.

I sat down on the edge of the bed and reached over to touch her arm. Letting her sleep would come later. I couldn’t allow any more time to pass with her believing I didn’t want our child.

Her eyes fluttered open, and she gasped. She started to sit up when her eyes locked on me. She froze and stared as if she wasn’t sure I was real. She blinked again and rubbed her eyes then squinted to see if I was still there. It was adorable, but it also broke my heart. She’d gone days thinking that I wouldn’t want our child. That I wouldn’t love it. That the stupid words I’d said while upset about Wills were true. If I had only known…

“Am I awake?” she whispered.

“Yes,” I assured her.

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