Page 61 of Hotter 'N Hell

“I told you. My wife. That’s why I am here.”

What did his wife have to do with this? I waited for more.

“Halo and Saylor had a talk over dirty martinis and ice cream. Seems Saylor is, uh, hurting or whatever shit drama she is living out right now. Halo has a big-ass heart and wants to do something for her. Fix things for her. I’m told that you sent Saylor packing because you believe her being here is putting the church folks in danger. Is that true, or did she make that shit up and you got rid of her because she was causing problems?”

Chalk up another sin for me on the tally board because I hated this man. He was a complete bastard. Was this the shit she lived with? Did that entire family treat her like she was dramatic and a problem? No wonder she stayed here, working insanehours. She’d had a safe place here. Somewhere that she was appreciated.

“I’m going to say this one more time. Do not disrespect Saylor,” I snarled, rage seething through me.

Bane looked slightly amused. “Or what? You gonna pray for me?” He chuckled, making my fist itch with the need to plant itself in his smug face.

“Saylor did an excellent job here. She spent more time and energy on the clothes closet than anyone has ever spent on all the ministries we have here combined. She made those who came in off the streets feel important. Gave them their dignity. She even won over Sister Mena, which is unheard of, but that smile and those dimples can melt a damn iceberg. If she wanted to. Clearly, she doesn’t find you worthy enough to spend the energy on.” I stopped when I realized I was shouting.

There was a good chance this man had a gun. He was involved in organized crime. But I didn’t give a shit. He’d said the wrong thing.

“If that’s so,” he drawled, not even flinching, “it seems her worth here should have had you wanting to keep her. Not force her to leave.”

I hadn’t forced her. I’d explained why she had to go.

“I had no choice. The windows were bombproof. Her car wasn’t towed away, but driven after what should have twisted it around the power pole. That kind of protection means she must be a target. And I can’t have that danger brought to our doors.” I paused and swallowed. “And I don’t want her putting herself in danger either. I can’t…now, that I know it wasn’t safe for her here, I wouldn’t be able to let her do it. The times she walked to and from the building to her car alone—I wasn’t protecting her. Something could have happened to her, and I can’t live with that.”

I’d said it. Something I hadn’t wanted to think about. BecauseI had let her go to protect her. Not the people here. I’d used it as an excuse to cover for the truth. I’d even lied to myself.

“She was never alone,” Bane said. “There was always someone watching her. One of us was stationed out of sight. Keeping an eye on her. We protect ours.”

Had she known that? Why hadn’t she told me?

Because she didn’t know it was her you were worried about, Jude.

Bane stood up, and I rose with him. Not liking the idea of that man towering over me. We were about the same height. I preferred we stayed eye level.

“When Saylor is on this property, it is one of the safest places in this town. If you sent her away because you thought you were bringing danger here, then that reason is void,” he told me. “If you sent her away because you’re a priest and she’s causing you to break all those Catholic rules, then admit it.”

He took a small square card from his pocket and slapped it down on the desk, keeping his finger on it as he lifted his eyes to look back at me. “Today is her twenty-second birthday. My wife is throwing her a surprise party at this address. So, if you want Saylor, come and get her. But be aware: if you make her cry, nothing she says will keep Gathe and Than from coming to make sure you don’t ever get the chance to do it again. There is no God, pulpit, or cross you can find to protect you from one of us.” His finger shoved the card at me. He straightened and sauntered out of my office without a backward glance.

My eyes dropped to the card he’d left behind. I hadn’t known when her birthday was. I didn’t know her favorite song, what she liked in her coffee or if she was drinking some sweet, creamy thing in those Starbucks cups. I didn’t know what her favorite color was, but I was going to guess pink. Her nails, nightgown, even a purse she had were shades of pink. I realized I wanted to know. All of it. Did she watch scary movies, and if so, did shecover her eyes when it got to the good parts? What was her most embarrassing moment as a kid? What had she looked like as a little girl? Had she worn braces?

I picked up the card.

It wasn’t just lust. Did I want to get her naked and in my bed? Absolutely. But that wasn’t all. I missed her. My days were long, empty, with no warmth, no laughter, just a duty. A routine with no joy.

Saylor’s entrance into my life had filled the emptiness, brought the sunshine. I couldn’t have her the way I wanted. But removing her from my life wasn’t working. Could I stay behind the line that my vows had drawn and still have her in my life?

Twenty-Three

Saylor

“Thank you for my birthday present,” I told Gathe as we drove back to the house he shared with his brother after our afternoon out shopping.

It had been a distraction and saved me from my mom taking me somewhere in a ruse to try and get me to talk. She was worried about me. I got that. But I didn’t want to talk about it.

“You’re welcome. That’s why I let you pick it out. I’d have never thought to purchase you a pair of tennis shoes with pearls and shit on them that look like they’ve been worn and beaten up, yet cost almost a grand. I would have gone with jewelry or something stupid like that.” The sarcasm dripping from his words got a small smile out of me.

“They’re cute.”

He cocked an eyebrow as he glanced over at me. “I’m almost positive I could have found something similar at a thrift store forten bucks.”

“They’re Golden Gooses. You would not have found anything like them for ten dollars.”

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