Page 30 of Leather & Lace

For me to put Dane in the middle of this was so unfair. That is like if he told me to choose him or Brook. I would never be able to let her go. I sauntered into the bathroom and fixed my smudged makeup. Thank God I brought my makeup bag with me, or I would have had to wash it all off. After I finished fixing my face, I headed downstairs.

The chef is already in the kitchen preparing the meal. I can smell the fresh garlic and Italian herbs floating in the air, the intoxicating scent making my stomach rumble in anticipation.

I headed into the dining room where Dane had some candles lit, giving a low-lighting scenery. He's wearing a black dress shirt that is unbuttoned on the top, his gold Rolex watch and a pair of expensive black slacks.

“I feel a bit undressed compared to you,” I say shyly. He just gives me a small grin, standing up and moving towards me.

“You could never be underdressed, unless you would want to.” His lips meet mine; a slow, passionate kiss takes me.My head spins from his sensual embrace. He breaks the kiss and looks deeply into my eyes, searching them. “Come sit down, dollface. I have some wine waiting for you.” I smile as we make our way to our seats. The wine, I can tell, is expensive.

I take a sip from the crystal, gold-rimmed glass and am met with a burst of dark chocolate, blackberries and a hint of dark roast. The full-flavored wine is the best I have ever had. I moan as I sip it. Dane just watches and smiles.

“I had a feeling you would like this.” He gestures to the wine bottle sitting in between us. I give him a smirk.

“Oh yeah, and why is that?” I tease back playfully.

He gives me a raised eyebrow and says, “Well, isn’t that what you and Brook drank the night you didn’t reply back to any of my texts?” I almost spit out the wine I had in my mouth. His eyes were glued on mine, amused.

“For one, I am sorry about that. And two, the wine we had was nothing compared to this beauty!” I say with heated cheeks. He just smiles in amusement. Our food was served a few moments later, and good lord was I pleased.

It was the best Italian food I had ever tasted. I swear, the chef had to have come straight from Italy. The pasta was soft, but firm at the same time. The marinara sauce tasted like it had been freshly made. Everything about the dish screamed Michelin chef status.

Dane sat quietly for most of the meal, mainly watching me stuff my face and moan after every bite. A bit of uncertainty filled his eyes. Something is off. I finished my meal, and the plates were cleared from the table. Dane was so quiet, still.

I started to become nervous. This must be about mine and Eli’s fighting. Or maybe from me almost jumping out of his moving car. Whatever it was has made him distant. I can feel him pulling away from me. I close my eyes and take a deep breath.

“What is it?” I asked as I opened my eyes back up to meet his. He sits there for a moment pondering what to say.

“I need to know why.” Is all he replies with. Why? What does that even mean?

“What do you mean?” My voice is becoming strained. He looks down at his glass and then back up to me.

“Why are you so defensive? Why do you shut me out?” I sat there stunned by his question. Is this how I truly come off to him? I mean, he has a point. I don’t get close to men. There is a reason for that. I don’t think I have ever truly believed I actually deserved love.

“I wasn’t aware I was shutting you out.”

Lie. What a lie.

He looks at me with a knowing glance. He even knows I am bullshitting.

“Jenny, look...I can’t do this if you can’t be honest with me.” The words he says jab into my heart like a knife. I know they are true, and I know he means well, but the reality that he would walk away from me cuts to the core.

“So, what, you are just going to like, end things between us, because I am not perfect and have some issues?” My tone is becoming harsher.

“You see, this is exactly what I mean, Jenny! You can’t keep your emotions at bay.” Dane stands up quickly, the chair he was sitting in falls to the floor. My anger is starting to flood every rational thought I have.

“What is your issue, Dane!” I stand and bang my fists into the table.

“You!”I stumbled back at his words. “You are my issue, Jenny! You have always been the fucking issue! Since the first time I laid my damn eyes on your perfect face, I have been screwed!” He stands there, breathing heavily.

I shake my head; tears start to sting my eyes. I never knew I was a burden on him. My stomach drops as I start to feel sick. I can feel it. My toxic tongue begging to come out to undo him. The memories of my childhood start to flash through my head like a runaway freight train.

“Ok Dane, you want to know me? Know everything about me and why I am this fucked up bitch?” I stand and glare at him, while tears start to soak my face, causing my mascara to burn my eyes. “I was a little girl. I was maybe five years old when my mother’s first boyfriend started to come into my room late at night and touch me.” His eyes widened in horror.

“Or, maybe it was when I was seven years old when I took my first dick from the next low life piece of shit she let into our house.” My body is trembling from the memories that now flood through me like a broken dam. His eyes start to swell over at my confessions.

“Or you know what it really was?” I take my glass of wine, chugging it as he breathes heavily. “Maybe it was the time my own mother sold me to her drug dealer for a quick fix when I was nine. I still to this day can smell his sweat and aftershave on my skin. She let him take me when I was asleep in my bed.” My sobs wrack out of me.

“I remember him thrusting on top of my little body, and I was so afraid. The shooting pain it caused to drive through my body. Is unforgettable. I gripped my teddy bear tightly as the tears pooled into my innocent eyes.

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