Page 103 of Twisted Obsession

Oh, I’m not.

‘Didn’t you love him?’ It was hard trying to sound interested in the questions I was asking when I already knew the answers, but I was trying to buy myself time. Focussing once again, I concentrated hard on not putting a foot down one of the many different sized holes in front of me. Her laughter found me first, and even without turning back to face her and seeing her facial expression, I ascertained it sounded a little manic.

‘He was just another man in a long line of men who thought they knew me; thought they could control me. When only one man has ever been man enough for that.’

Even before I gave him his title, I knew I was wrong, but I managed to ask ‘Papa?’

‘No, not him… I gave him all of me, and he gave me a bastard son sired from a whore in return,’ she angrily replied.

‘Salvatore?’ Mistakenly, I looked over my shoulder at her as I spoke my eldest brother’s name. In the distance, I could see another boat. But even though I wanted to stare harder at the approaching vessel, I didn’t allow my gaze to fix on it; too scared to, in case I alerted her and the two men walking beside her.

Please let it be you, Dante,I pathetically hoped, as once again a loud rumble of thunder travelled overhead.

My mama’s arm swung fast, in reply to me daring to mention Salvatore’s name, and the butt of the gun in her hand struck just above my top teeth. My head moved backwards so fast, I was sure I would have whiplash from the force. Blood filled my mouth instantly, and my tongue ran around my teeth as I checked they were all still in place. Thankfully, they were intact.

‘Don’t speak his name to me—keep walking,’ she hissed.

‘I’m sorry, Mama,’ I lied, resisting to spit out the blood that was now collecting inside my mouth in case I upset her any further, because it wasn’t the ladylike thing to do. Instead, I allowed it to dribble from the corner of my mouth.

‘I took care of his mama, your papa’s whore.’ I could sense the vehemence in her voice.

‘You did?’ I questioned, as I placed a foot in the wrong place and feeling the wood beginning to break up, I altered my footing and tried again. ‘You took her?’ I grimaced at my question, knowing it could throw her over the precarious edge of sanity.

‘Yes, her and many others. We ran a very profitable trafficking business right under the Ferraros and the De Lucas noses.’

It was her?The crime that my papa had been killed for. The same one that Dante’s papa had been accused of. She was mentally ill; I was certain of it. But shockingly, I realised that what she’d just imparted didn’t surprise me in the slightest. Ever since I’d been a child, I had been aware that she and I weren’t in any way alike. She was hard to love, hard to please, and closed off, even to her own children. One day, years after Salvatore had arrived in our lives, Romeo, Gabriel and I, were talking about how angry and bitter she still was, which we appreciated could be her trying to cover up her hurt at my papa’s bastard son, but what we couldn’t understand was her constant need to lash out at us, her own children.

‘That’s where Gianni went wrong,’ she carried on. ‘Until then, I was devoted to him.’ I was convinced I could hear pain in her voice. ‘In my eyes, very soon after he became a pathetic excuse of a man. Not the son of a future Don. Our family needed a replacement. I needed a replacement.’

Replacement?Did she think that Ricco could fill that role?

‘But that made him easy to manipulate,’ she carried on. ‘I made sure he killed Lia Ranieri with his bare hands. And I watched him do it.’ My heart broke just a little more for my eldest brother.

‘You did?’ Even I couldn’t control the shock sounding in my voice as I discovered just how depraved my parents both were.

‘I did.’ She added a small laugh. ‘Gianni loved the drugs and alcohol I’d made certain he’d became addicted to.’

You evil bitch. He might have done the deed but sure as hell you might as well have pulled the proverbial trigger.

I lurched forward suddenly, as she shoved her hand in between my shoulder blades once again. My heart rate accelerated as I fought to stay upright. Swallowing down my pride in my bid for survival, I began to try to show her understanding.

‘I’m sorry he made you feel that way. He should have loved you better, he should have loved you more,’ I lied, and knowing we were coming closer to the shore I began to search the beach and surrounding area for someone, for anyone. In my peripheral view to the right, I saw a small group of men, possibly three or four of them, coming down a coastal path towards us. To the left, I was certain I could see at least three cars parked at the very top of the cliff surrounding the cove we’d sailed into.

Who each group were, I had no idea. Worry engulfed me and I pushed it away, knowing it had no place when all my senses needed to be honed on her, my mama. My coercive, murdering mama. Who, I now had absolutely no doubt whatsoever, would take my life, if it meant she could live.

‘Do you have any idea what it’s like to be a strong woman married to pathetic man?’ she unexpectedly asked.

I was just about to answer, when she answered her own question.

‘Of course you do… you married a Giordano.’ Again, she began to laugh manically, and I refused her an answer.

Pain began to tear through me, as my head began to thump out its displeasure at her earlier violence against me. But it wasn’t anything like the pain I was struggling to contain inside me, as I wondered if Dante and I would ever meet again. As I walked, I remembered, and I thanked God that we’d spent thelast evening together. If I died, I now understood entirely what it was to love and to be loved. I remembered what it felt like to be held in his arms, the way his signature cologne enveloped me, and his touch on my skin. The way our bodies spoke wordlessly to each other, as though they knew they were meant to be together. The sky was shades of grey around us, but for those few seconds, all I could see was blue. I squeezed my eyes tight and dared to look deep into his vibrant blue eyes, the ones I’d been a little in love with since I was a small child, and I found that love returned to me.

I was loved.

You just need to survive, Giovanna. I’m coming, amore mio.I heard Dante’s voice and began to turn my head from side to side as I attempted to find him. But, of course, I didn’t find him because he wasn’t there.

I love you Dante, my husband.

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