Page 83 of Knot All is Forgiven

To what it means.

She takes my silence as ignorance and barrels through my inner turmoil. "They were trying to save you from this, Jordan. It was stupid, and they shouldn't have lied and should have talked to you more, but they saw what happened to me happening to you and wanted to make sure you never felt that pain."

"But I knew," I say quietly. "I knew I was their Omega."

"But they didn't. And yeah, you knew, but seriously, Jordan, the fact that you presented so late should be proof enough that no one but you could have seen it coming." I wince as if she slapped me, and she forges on, oblivious to the effect her words have on me. "I'm not saying you need to forgive them and welcome them in with open arms immediately, but you do need to try to see it through their eyes."

I pull back from her, upset and angry that she told me her trauma as a way to erase my own. She must sense the direction my thoughts are going because the younger Beta reaches out and grabs my arm. "Jordan. I'm not saying you're not hurt and that your hurt is invalid. I'm saying you need to approach this by remembering what they were doing would have been the kindest thing they could have done if you had ended up being a Beta."

I wrench the door to my car open and climb out without looking back at Athena.

Who does she think she is, trying to manipulate me with her pain? Trying to make me see the parallels between our situations?

Anger roils within me, but it's doused the moment I see her climb out of the car. Her body is hunched over as she turns herself inward with emotional pain. Telling her whole story was a sacrifice.

And she made it for me.

My ire towards Athena isn't fair. It's rooted in the realization that maybe I can no longer hold onto my anger towards Pack Stargazer because of their decision.

They still hurt me, and they still lied to me, but maybe, just maybe, their actions weren't entirely irredeemable.

Chapter thirty-two

"Shut the fuck up,you motherfucking cocksucking asshole!" Simon roars, throwing his controller onto the floor.

Icarus holds his hands up, his face twisted in amusement. "Calm down, Slime, it was just a star," he says placatingly. "You still have four turns left to get another or steal it back."

"You know you can't do much in four turns of Mario Party!" Simon glares at the man. "That's it, you're not allowed in the pack."

"Oh shut up, Slime," Rafe says from his reclined position on the couch beside Icarus. "It's just a game."

"All of you are ganging up on poor old Luigi!" he whines, flopping back onto the ground, his legs sprawled around him.

The easy camaraderie and jokes make me feel sixteen again. I snatch my eyes away from the green-haired Alpha and take my turn under the skeptical eye of my competitive packmate.

"I'm watching you, Cyrus. Stay away from my coins," Simon growls from the floor.

I roll my eyes and turn my attention back to the game. Bowser punches the die, moves four spaces, and gets six coins when I land on a blue space. "You're really going to try to toss Icarus out of the pack because of a game of Mario Party?" I nudge him with my toe. "Seems like a surefire way to lose Jordan again."

Simon stiffens and hands his controller to Icarus. "Here, Russ, play as me. Make sure you give yourself all my coins and stars."

Icarus barks out a laugh, shaking his head and pushing the controller back to Simon. "Thanks for the offer, but I can win just fine without sabotaging you." He turns his attention to the 2x2 game that queues up on the screen. "And Russ, huh? A nickname feels serious, and this is only the first date, Slime."

The Alpha chuckles, brushing some of his green hair from his eyes."Well, you said I can't call you Vick," Simon says with a shrug. "And Icarus is a mouthful. So, Russ. Or I can get you into the Hawks and get you a cut and a road name."

"Oh yes, Dr. Icarus Valentine is definitely someone who would join the Hawks," I say with a snort. "But then again, I wouldn't have thought you'd end up in a club like that, Simon."

Simon climbs to his feet and grabs us all beers from the kitchen, smiling down at me as he presses one into my hand. "You'd be surprised, but it's not like books and movies. Most of us are not enforcers."

"Enforcer?" Icarus asks, picking at the label on his beer. "Like… muscle?"

"Yeah, the muscle," Simon chuckles. "I am not the muscle." He gestures to his slim build. "I work in the body shop and keep the books."

"Putting that finance degree to good use?" Rafe says with a soft smile. Both of them have degrees in it, but Rafe works in the sector. I'm surprised Simon found a way to use it in the MC club.

The evening continues like this, with us trading barbs and peppering light conversation in with information about us. It's shocking how well Icarus fits in. It's like he's always been a part of us.

"Okay, I have to ask," Icarus asks between bites of pizza. "Are any of you guys together together?"

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