Page 119 of Knot All is Forgiven

I've been fighting it. And I know part of me will fight until my heart learns it's safe.

But this is my pack.

It always has been.

Chapter forty-five

My blood and urinetests came back fine, so I was discharged with instructions to get lots of affection, touch, and rest. We piled into Rafe's too-small car to head home, and none of the guys were willing to leave me to get their cars from my office's parking garage.

We're nearly home when the big yellow letters of "Omegamart" catch my eye, and I shake Cyrus' shoulder. I'm wedged between him and Rafe in the backseat while Icarus drives and Simon rides shotgun. It's a tight fit, but we manage.

"Omegamart! Let's go shopping," I exclaim, pointing out the window.

Icarus grunts his displeasure at the idea. "No, sunshine, we need to get you home and in your nest with a warm mug of tea. Your body needs rest."

I pull on Cyrus' shirt with wide eyes, a whine bubbling in my throat. "You said we would, Cyrus. Please? It's been a shitty day to be an Omega. Remind me of why this is a good thing."

Cyrus stares at me blankly for a moment, then his eyes crinkle at the corners, and a soft smile stretches across his face. "Russ, pull over, man. We don't have to stay for long."

"Yeah,Russ," I say sweetly, "just for a little while."

"Do not call me Russ." His voice has taken on that teasing, fake-frustrated tone he often uses with me as he pulls a U-turn and finds a parking spot in the department store lot.

"But that one makes more sense than Vick, and you hate Vick." I shuffle out of the door behind Rafe, who chuckles as he takes my hand.

"I love it when you call me Vick," Icarus says, kissing my forehead.

"You threatened to kill me once for it."

"You what?" Rafe snarls, dropping my hand and stalking towards the chuckling doctor.

I grab his arm to still his pursuit. When Rafe drops his dark eyes to mine, I nuzzle my face into him. "It was a joke, obviously. I asked him if he was a murderer, and he said Icarus wasn't, but Vick could be. He didn't like his nickname so much then."

"All of this could be solved if you just called us all Alpha," Simon chides as he skips into the store.

"I vote for that," Cyrus says with a heated gaze that weakens my knees. "I think that should be a pack rule."

"All in favor?" Rafe asks, crossing his arms.

A chorus of 'aye' fills the air, and I cross my arms in an exaggerated pout.

"The motion passes!" Simon shouts with glee, picking me up and spinning me around.

"Just for that, I'm never calling any of you Alpha again!" I stick my tongue out, walking backward into the store to glare at my pack.

"Don't toy with us, Omega," Cyrus says in a low purr. "You're severely outnumbered."

Icarus grabs a shopping cart as we cross the threshold into the store, and any response I have for Cyrus gets stuck in my throat as I turn around and look at the towering shelves and aisles of the Omega-centric store.

When I first purchased everything for my nest, I ordered online. I was so embarrassed that the people in the store would realize I wasn't an Omega yet that I couldn't bear to show my face. But I have longed to come here and touch all the fabrics and see the options available to me in person.

It felt like something I missed out on, and here I am, finally getting to feel like a real Omega.

Tears spill out of my eyes and drip down my cheeks as I stare at the stacks of nesting materials.

"Woah, hey, Jordy." Rafe rushes to gather me in his arms. "You're okay. You're okay. What's going on?"

My mouth gapes like a fish as I try to get the words out several times. They never come, though, getting stuck somewhere between gratitude for being here and grief that this is my first time.

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