Page 126 of Promises in the Dark

“Well, maybe feeling nothing is better than this constant fucking agony,” I fired back, my fists clenched at my sides.

“I needed to try!” she said, wiping her tears angrily. “That’s who I am. I want to save people because it is the right thing to do.”

I grabbed her shoulders, forcing her to look at me. “And what about you, Red? Who’s going to saveyou?”

She shoved me away. “I don’t need saving, Rogue,” she whispered brokenly. “I need someone who gets me. And you never have.”

That hit a nerve.

Right where it hurt.

I threw my hands up in frustration, her accusation digging in deep.

“Then make me understand,” I pleaded, my anger melting away into concern. “Explain to me why you’re so hell-bent on saving everyone when it’s clear it’s a losing battle. I’m not a fucking mind reader.”

But instead of explaining herself, she just shook her head vehemently and turned away from me.

That was it. That was the spark that set off the powder keg of rage inside me. My face went hot, my heart racing like a jackrabbit on steroids.

“Oh no, you’re not pulling that shit on me again,” I exploded, grabbing her arm and spinning her back around to face me. “Youalwaysdo this—get all high and mighty and then clam up when someone calls you out on your bullshit.”

Red’s face went white-hot with rage as she yanked her arm free. “Mybullshit? You’re the one who’s always so quick to give up on people!”

Her martyr complex. That damnfuckingmartyr complex.

“Give up on people?” my voice rose to a shout. “You’re the one thinking you can fix everyone and everything!”

And just to make matters worse, a soldier walked by, staring at us like we were the main attraction at a fucking circus.

I shoot him a look that could peel paint off a fucking wall, and the bastard got the hint, scurrying off like a cockroach when the lights came on as he continued his patrol.

Good choice, buddy.

The whole base could hear us for all I cared.

Red looked at me like I’d lost my mind and we were suddenly nose-to-nose, our faces inches apart. I could feel her breath, and she could damn sure feel my anger.

“You don’t know what it’s like to lose someone youlove!” she shouted back at me, spittle flying from her lips. “You don’t know what it’s like to feel responsible for their death! You don’t know what it’s like to live with that guilt every day!”

“You’re such a fucking hypocrite!” I roared back, my voice booming. “You think you’re the only one who’s lost someone? You think you’re the only one who’s felt guilty?!”

She looked at me with tears in her eyes. “Howdareyou!”

I knew we were both saying things we’d regret later, but in that moment I didn’t care. I was sick of being lectured by Miss Goody Two-Shoes over here about what was right and wrong. Sick of being told that I didn’t care about anyone else when that was far from the truth.

“You’re so caught up in your own self-righteousness you can’t see the bigger picture!” I yelled at her.

“And you’re so caught up in your own apathy you can’t see the human beings right in front of you!” she flung over her shoulder as she stormed off.

“Oh, so now you’re just going to walk away?” I called after her, grabbing her arm again.

She spun back around to face me, another tear slipping down her cheek. “What do you want me to say, huh? That I’m sorry for trying to save people? For caring about their lives?”

“No,” I said stubbornly. “I want you to admit that it’sfutile. That sometimes people are beyond saving.”

She tried to pull away again, but this time, I didn’t let go. I held her tight. “You’re so cold-hearted!” she shouted at me.

“And you’re so naive!” I hissed in her ear.