Page 104 of That Reunited Feeling

“I’ll find out what schoolwork you’ll be missing, and you can keep up with it. And maybe read books. Go for walks in nature. Help Maggie clean up the yard for spring. Something that gets you out in the world and learning to consider others.”

“Youdon’t consider others.”

“I beg your pardon!” I have never once said “fucking” in front of Dylan, but how the hell I managed to stop myself in the face of the red mist of anger and hurt at the sentence that just fell so easily from his lips, I will never know.

“If you consideredme, you wouldn’t have made us move out of the house where I had a nice big bedroom. And you wouldn’t make me leave all my friends and move to California.”

I wasn’t planning to tell him about this right now, or in this way, but there’s no way in hell I’m letting him think for a second longer that I’m moving us for selfish reasons.

The pain of his words stings in my chest as I take a breath and force myself to calm down and use a more caring tone.

I move back toward him and rest my hands on his shoulders. “Dylan, it’sbecauseI’m considering you that we’re moving to California.” He’s staring at his feet, so I take his face in my hands and tip it up to look at me for the most important part. “Rachel’s gotten you into a clinical trial for a new ear treatment at her hospital. It might stop your hearing from getting worse.”

“My hearing’s fine.”

“Right now, yes. But you know it will get worse as you get older. This might stop that happening. Or really slow it down.”

“But not definitely?”

“Nothing’s guaranteed with a trial. But there’s a chance. And it’s a chance worth taking.”

“But I like my school. And my friends. And I like Maggie and Jim. And Tom is super cool and teaching me guitar.”

And there’s the knife to my heart. My fear. My dread. Getting attached to Tom.

“Tom’s going back to London in a few weeks. Don’t get used to him being around. Tom is leaving.” My feelings are one thing, but there’s no way I’m having him break my son’s heart too.

“And you’re going to make me move away from all the other things for something that might not work.” Dylan yanks himself from my grasp and turns away.

I do not have time to get into this right now. And I need to be in a calmer frame of mind when I do.

I take a breath. “Let’s talk about this properly later. I have all the details from the hospital on my laptop. We can go through it all together. But right now, I need to go see Maggie and apologize.”

He slouches off toward his bedroom in silence.

“You have homework, right?” I call to his hunched frame.

“Dunno.”

“Well, I do. And I expect to see a chunk of it done by the time I get back.”

His bedroom door slams behind him.

Fan-fucking-tastic.

I close the front door behind me, wrap my cardigan tight across my chest, and head across the dark driveway toward the light over the Dashwoods’ front door.

As I approach the wide steps, my phone buzzes in my back pocket.

RACHEL (06:41 PM)

OMFG, this is you, right?

There’s a link to a video shot by someone in the crowd at last night’s gig. I can’t bring myself to click it open. That was a fantasy. Something unreal.

My reality lies behind this large green door and the kind, generous, big-hearted woman to whom I owe a massive apology for my increasingly badly behaved son.

RACHEL (06:41 PM)

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