Page 47 of All Saints: Pledge

“…sex.”

He doesn’t deny it.

All the air leaves my lungs and I sink back against my pillows. I feel like I have to immediately get up and take a shower. I should have expected this. As Elizabeth Bennet would say I’m in want of money and connections and I have nothing to offer in exchange. I’d been naïve to assume it was about anything other than sex. My stomach lurches. “I think I’m going to throw up.Nothing is worth being raped or a sex slave.”

At least the boob tape and slinky dress make all the sense now. God, I really am sheltered if I didn’t catch on. No wonder they want innocent young people. Worldly teenagers would know to avoid stuff like this.

Kendall scoots back a little in alarm.“It’s only with consent.” Then he steadies himself and nods. “But exactly my point. It’s how All Saints operates. And so many of our inductee members later become sponsors. It twists the way they do business. The way they see the world. I needed to tell you this so that you honor your grandfather’s wishes, and stay away. Their help is not for impressionable people like you.”

Irrational anger floods my veins. I hate the patronizing tone in his voice. Ihatethat he knows all of this, and I’ve been kept in the dark. “Because you think I can’t handle it.”

Shock registers a moment before his mouth shapes the words. “No, because it would ruin you. You are going to do so much good in this world and I want you to do it free from the chains of All Saints.”

I scoff. “So now you suddenly thinksohighly of me? How convenient when you are apparently okay with joining this yourself.”

Kendall hesitates and reaches out, the back of his knuckles gliding down my arm. Gooseflesh rises in the wake and I swallow hard. “I believe in you enough to tell you. They could kick me out for telling you this. Or worse.” He pauses. “I need you to understand just how very fucked up it is that you and Clara are here.”

I level him with a look. “Oh, because you are concerned about my eternal soul and virtuous nature?”

His gaze is steady on mine, and he leans ever so slightly closer. His fingers still linger at my wrist. “Something like that. It’s… complicated.Youbeing here makes things complicated for me. Don’t you remember what I told you last week?”

I do remember. He was adamant that his behavior toward me in high school was my fault. My fault for somehow making him think I was meant to be his, but he couldn’t have me. It’s entitled white boy shit, and I refuse to let him draw me in again. I roll my eyes and huff out a frustrated breath. “And now we get to it. You’re selling me some sort of Capulets and Montagues story. Some tale of you father’s retribution, but really it’s aboutyou. It’s because you don’t want me in your way. You are as self-centered as always, Kendall. Jesus, I can’t believe I even let you in here to talk. You only care about yourself.”

I think for a moment he’s going to get up and walk out. But what he does next is both more surprising and infinitely worse. He uses the fingers around my wrist to pull me closer, into his body. I struggle slightly, because I’m angry with him andconfused. This doesn’t feel like the reaction I’ve come to expect from either version of Kendall.

His arms come around my body in some sort of…hug? As if we’re boyfriend and girlfriend having a fight, and he wants to make sure I know everything is going to be okay. It’s so absolutely bananas I try the surprise approach myself. I go still and rigid. He leans his head down until mine is tucked unwillingly under his chin and he takes a long deep breath.

“I upset you, and I’m sorry. You still don’t understand—you being hereisabout me. It’s about you, and your past, but it’s mostly about me. My father knows that I hate this society. I don’t know if he knows that I ultimately want to destroy it…and then he discovered you existed. And he suspects my feelings for you, and saw an opportunity to control me by inviting someone I care about to be a part of this monstrous thing. Not only that, two birds, one stone, you’re the granddaughter of someone he resents—someone who caused our own family great personal harm. My father is trying to wrong a right done to his father—he’s trying to even the score by forcing you into this process. Forcing you to submit. To sign a contract. To be bound to us, just like your grandfather was supposed to be. I can only guess he also means to punish you for your grandfather’s crimes, somehow.”

My heartbeat increases. “How…how did my grandfather create that much animosity?”

He shrugs. “Your grandmother was betrothed through the society to my grandfather. She chose your father, and he convinced her to leave with him. It voided two contracts, left my grandfather very publicly embarrassed, and almost collapsed All Saints. He set a very dangerous precedent that you didn’t have to do what the organization told you to do. That you could take or leave your reward, that you didn’t have an obligation to continue the Oxford Dynasty.”

Well shit. “That explains the retribution portion. But I still don’t get why he thinks me being here would control you. That doesn’t make sense.”

Kendall forces my chin up and I can feel his heart racing under my hand as I push off his chest slightly to keep my neck from snapping.

His hands slide up to cup my chin, holding me like I’m fine china.

“What if I really am the Montagues, and you are the Capulets. What if we are fated to be star-crossed lovers? It all makes sense when you realize what my father does—thatyouare my kryptonite.”

22

Iblink. Twice. Before an unladylike snort comes unbidden from the back of my throat. “Okay, that’s over the top. You almost had me,” I say, rolling my eyes. I reach up and play at putting my hand over his mouth. His drama is unlike any other person I’ve ever met. And for a moment, for amoment, I was stupid enough to buy into his whole “secret society Romeo and Juliet” nonsense. Spell? Broken.

“Helena,” Kendall says from under my hand, “I’m serious. It’s the whole reason you’re here. Well, and you were stupid enough to apply.”

“Oh myGod,Kendall, truly just shut up.” I go to push off of him, this time in earnest. It’s like pushing against steel bands. “Let me go.”

“No. You were stupid enough to let me do this too. Not so easily undone.” He’s looking down at me with a glint in his eye, I can only name as possession. It’s unnerving, and I bristle.

“You let me go, or I’ll bite you.”

He tilts his head down until we’re nose to nose, and now his possession is heightened by intent. And my heart is racing foraltogether traitorous reasons. “Don’t make promises you don’t intend to keep.”

My mouth falls open a little, and his eyes slide down to my lips. “Helena, you undo me. Shocking you is the best part of every day. Has been for years. I daydream about all the ways I can make that beautiful mouth fall open, make your eyes flash. Do you know how hot it is to watch your cheeks get pink, or your neck? Or your chest, when you’re mad? To watch you squirm in a seat? Getting a rise out of you, well.” He pulls me in to him so I can make no mistake about his double entendre. “It’s sexy as hell. And to think. You never would have known if my father hadn’t figured it out.”

I feel like I’ve jetted off to some other planet. Like I’m whirling through the stars on an out of control rocket ship. “You…you made me mad on purpose in high school because you liked how I lookedwhen I’m mad? You got off on us hating each other. That is truly messed up.” I’m spluttering, trying to make sense of my universe.