Page 19 of All Saints: Pledge

His hands slide lower, gripping my hips and rocking into me. I can feel how very much hedoesn’thate what is happening. A hard length presses into my hip and up my side.

“See what you do to me? Every day for four years I had toknowwhat this was like and pretend I didn’t want it.”

“You…. Bastard.” I say between quick breaths. Something is building inside me, and I want to tear off my clothes and his. I want to take his tie off with my teeth. “You didn’t have to ignore it.” We could have saved ourselves so much time.

“I did. I do. None of this ever happened. Thiscannothappen again, not with you.”

Anger spikes into my bloodstream, clearing my head. “What,stillnot good enough for you? Even at fucking Oxford? You are afirst class asshole pretending like you’re dallying with the help.” I shove him back as hard as I can. “IsaidIhateyou. Get your hands off me.”But don’t, my body says. I tell it to go to hell.

Above our heads, I hear Clara calling for him. And… is that Dominic?

Now I’m freezing. The heat, everything…everything rushes out of me. I’m pressed up against a stone wall, my hair is a mess, breathing like I ran a marathon. And I’m no longer sandwiched by Kendall’s frame.

He’s ten paces away, straightening his tie. His shirt. Wiping every little piece of evidence of me from his body. And then Clara is there, peering into the darkness. I see Li and Dominic over his shoulder. Only I can see the fever bright burn of Kendall’s eyes as he reaches for me. “Congratulations,” he says as he grasps my elbow to lead me forward.

I rip my elbow out of his hands. “Don’t touch me,” I hiss. His condescension is the cherry on the pie.Congratulations, my ass. As if that kiss was a prize I’m lucky for winning.

“She’s had too much to drink, you should take her home,” he’s telling Li. “I worry someone put something in her drink.” I shouldn’t be staring at how his suit coat stretches over his lean shoulders, and avert my eyes.

“Oh my God,” Clara says, putting a hand to her mouth. Suspicion drops from her eyes, replaced by pity.

Bastard. I only had the drink from him, so if my drinkwas spiked, itwas his doing.

Kendall reaches out for Clara’s arm. “Do you want to go back in? You look cold. I just wanted her to find her friends before leaving.”

Li wraps her coat around me, loudly proclaiming what a group of wankers college men are. I suck in a breath. “Bastard,” I say out loud, just loud enough for him to hear. “You did this.”

The smile he gives me is wolfish and it doesn’t reach his eyes. He chews on his words enough that I gather he’s pondering saying something he shouldn’t. Something about what just passed between us. But he doesn’t. He just leans in under the guise of straightening my under the coat collar.

“Go home, Helena.”

“Go to Hell, Kendall.”

“I probably will. And now you’re joining me since you just passed your first test. Welcome to All Saints.”

11

“I’m sorry, what did you just say?” Jaqueline’s face leans so close to her iPad screen, I see the eyeliner smudged under her left eye, and up her right nostril.

I don’t mean to tell her everything, it just…falls out. I’ve kept the things listed in my NDA a secret from Jaqueline. Barely. But I tell her in excruciating detail about my little dalliance. Whatever Kendall slipped me last night has lasting effects on my impulse control. I’m in no hurry to leave my room. What if I spill all the beans to someone here and ruin my chances with either Dominic or All Saints?

“Okay, I’m going to repeat back what I heard.” Jaqueline pinches the bridge of her nose, and then levels her eyes into the camera.

“Kendall followed you to a party last night, spiked your drink, and then you…kissedhim. No, correction. Dry humped him. Helena, I can’t even say those words. It’s just…beyond bananas.”

“Yeah, I just…” I wave my hands in the air, at a loss for what I “just”.

She purses her lips. “Well, how was it?”

“How was what?”

Her breath erupts like a volcanic explosion. “Tea with the Queen. You ass. Kissing Kendall.”

“Oh.” I’ve spentsomuch of my time obsessing over how messed up the whole situation is that I haven’t stopped to consider that point. I sit a moment. “Terrible,” I lie, straight into the camera.

She blinks. “Jesus, Helena. What a messed up thing. Youlikedit.”

I throw up my hands. “He did too! It’s like we werebothon drugs! It was absolutely ludicrous.” I drop my head to my hands. “Why does he have to be God’s gift to kissing? He’s insufferable. He’s a bastard. He’s worse here than he was at home.”

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