Page 27 of Christmas Secrets

Ainsley nodded. “A miniature Neamh does sound amazing. I wonder where he found it?”

“Special order,” Corey said with a grin. “He said he had it made special.”

“Wow, I wonder who the lucky person is?” Ainsley teased, but her heart drummed in her chest. She loved snow globes, always had. But Dal would never buy her a gift, why would he? Especially since he despised her. She wondered if he was coming to the Christmas party? What if he had bought it for her? Would he still give it to her? Worse yet, why did she even care?

She felt a headache coming on.

***

Ben left Thistlewindand went into Inverness to pick up some supplies at the feed store. His thoughts were never far from Dottie and his frustration with her grew by the hour. He thought over their conversation the night they had gone to the Christmas Gardens.

She’d volunteered on the spur of the moment, she said, and then regretted it. How had she felt inferior enough to pull a stunt like this? It seemed so out of proportion with the confident and successful young business woman she was that he couldn’t wrap his mind around it. And she kept it hidden even when she had the chance to confess and get it over with. Why?

When he pulled into Highland Feed, he saw Darro’s Neamh truck parked in front. Lucerne was sitting in the passenger’s side and the truck was running, so he must be picking up something as well. He waved at Lucerne through the glass and tried to form a smile instead of the perpetual frown he knew was on his face since he’d left Heaven’s Gate.

Lucerne smiled and rolled down the window as he turned off his truck and got out.

“Hiya, Ben. What brings ye into town?”

“Just picking up some supplies and whatever else takes my fancy,” he replied. He knew his fake smile didn’t reach his eyes when Lucerne studied his face.

“Is something wrong? Ye don’t seem too happy.”

Ben hesitated. Lucerne was a few years older than Dottie and much younger than Poppy. Poppy had told him Dottie might have reasons he wasn’t aware of and to be patient, but mayhap Lucerne might know her generation better. He hated anyone knowing his business, but perhaps he could make an exception. He reached up and rubbed the back of his neck through his gloves where the tense muscles protested.

“Can I ask ye something, Lucerne?” he finally said. “It’s about Dottie, but I don’t want everyone to know about it.”

Concern immediately flooded Lucerne’s pale skin. “Is she okay? What is it, Ben? Here, jump into the truck, it’s freezing out there.” She opened the door and scooted over to the middle.

“Okay, thank ye, it is right cold out here.” Ben climbed in and felt the warmth snuggling up to his body and it felt good. The wind was a bit brisk and his nose and lips were already feeling frozen. Then he explained what he’d found and watched as Lucerne’s eyes grew large and round.

“Right now, I’m so angry I just want to throw her over my lap and spank some sense into her,” he growled. “I just don’t understand it, Lucerne. I know she hates cooking, so why did she even volunteer, let alone spend so much money on those dishes? Do ye have any idea? And why won’t she tell me? Why do I have to force it out of her? I’ve given her plenty of opportunity to tell me. I’ve known something was wrong because she’s been eating up her thumbs like she always does when she’s under a lot of stress.”

“I see yer problem,” Lucerne replied slowly. “If I were ye, I wouldn’t force it out of her though. If I had to guess, I’d say the extreme stress is knowing she’s deceiving ye and hating herself fer it.”

“All she has to do is tell me and we’ll figure it out together.” he protested, feeling exasperated at that answer.

“It’s not always that simple in a woman’s mind. Perhaps to ye, and most men, it’s black and white, but to a woman, there are always colors of gray in every situation. Thewhat ifs.”

Ben stared. “Thewhat ifs?” He reached up and rubbed his nose. “Ye have lost me,” he confessed.

Lucerne chuckled. “What ifI tell him and he hates me?What ifI don’t tell, can I live with that?What ifhe finds out anyway?Whatif I’ve hurt him?What ifhe’s so angry that Christmas is ruined?What ifeveryone finds out?What ifhe can’t forgive me?What ifhe really punishes me hard?What ifhe doesn’t understand? See? It’s thewhat if’sthat drive us crazy.”

“Good Lord,” Ben muttered helplessly. “No wonder she’s chewing her thumbs off with all that swirling around in her wee head. Seems to me it would be more merciful if I just told her I knew and spanked her fer it right then.”

It was Lucerne’s turn to stare. “Ye don’t want to know her reasons? Just throw her over yer lap like a brute and paddle the daylights out of her? Then pick her up, kiss her, and call it all good?”

“If it would save her all that misery then aye, it sounds like a better deal to me,” he exclaimed. “I think I’d be doing her a favor.”

“Trust me, ye won’t.”

When the driver’s door opened and Darro slid in, they both jumped. “What’s going on in here? Is there something I need to know, honey? Ye two are so cuddled up together that I’m beginning to get suspicious.” His dark brows slid up in question as they both stared at him.

“Why don’t ye ask Darro what he thinks?” Lucerne snapped at Ben. “Mayhap both of ye can’t be that obtuse about women.”

“Cripes,” Ben muttered. “I should never have said anything.”

“Wife troubles, Ben?” Darro asked smoothly, humor lighting up his eyes. “Wouldn’t happen to be something about that lasagna, would it?”

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