Page 65 of A Night with Damien Spur

‘Well, it was good to meet you,’ he said. ‘Do you want to visit the ladies first?’

‘No, it’s okay.’

‘That’s good, a bladder like a camel.’ Couldn’t he see that she was desperate to leave?

Maybe if she took a taxi, she’d be back in time to see herfavourite show,Someone Like Us, a programme about ordinary people who had secret habits like shoplifting and stealing deliveries left outside houses.

‘Sorry, I really have to go. I have a dinner appointment,’ she said.

And on she went, eager to meet the man who would whisk her off to Sardinia and treat her like a precious jewel.

But no one came. Nothing changed.

Until that Monday…

Chapter 17

Anna’s morning began as usual.

First: wake up, wash, make-up, dress.

Then: radio on, Magic FM and a quick cup of coffee.

Next: check the dating app.

Messages: yes.

Message:We seem to be a good match, what do you think?

A generic one-liner from Hopeful Dick, Essex.

Anna glanced at his picture and winced. He was hideous. A shiny bald head, tiny eyes, a ring in his nose and a thin, sadistic smile.

She scrolled down his profile page, a game she played just to see if the personality matched the face.

Occupation:Ask me later

Income:Struggling

Dating activities:Cooking at home and walking. Favourite food Indian

Anna disliked Indian food and there was no mention of restaurants, theatreortravelling.

Turn-ons:Erotica, flirting, dancing, skinny dipping

Her eyes flickered and her mouth twitched.

Personality traits:Wild, thrill-seeking, adventurous, sexy

Valued qualities in a partner:Wild, thrill-seeking, adventurous, sexy

Anna wondered how on earth she – a woman who had not only been bedded by celebrity writer Damien Spur, but who had been mentored by him – she, who had been the queen of the social scene, and indeed still mixed with some very chic people, could have been contacted by such a creep.

Her lovely profile photos, her sophisticated likes:Fine dining, travel, theatre

Her sort of man:Handsome, wealthy, cultured, etc.

A zero match.

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