Page 34 of The Christmas Keeper

Mom’s head snapped up from cutting her asparagus. A small fire in a huge hearth snapped and popped behind her.

“Oh, I’m sorry to hear that. I hope they didn’t turn against you when you came out.” She pointed at me with her fork. “When Brann came out, we were totally fine with him being gay. I think we went out and bought a rainbow flag for our front porch the very next day.”

That was true. They had taken it pretty damn well, considering my mother was a firm believer in the tenets of the Catholic church. To a point. She was not happy about the way women and queers were treated and was quite vocal about it. Father Leon had gotten more than one earful over the years.

“That was a large part of our issues, yes, but they couldn’t handle my drug use,” Kenan said as he buttered a warm bun. My mother and father both stopped slicing asparagus. Nora and Antoine shared looks with me.

“That’s their loss,” I said just as bowls of lentil soup arrived and were placed in front of us. A small band—one man on guitar, one on keyboards, and a young woman in a silver dress—began playing in the corner. Soft holiday tunes filled the eatery.

“It certainly is. God will not judge you unkindly when you kneel before him for judgment, Kenan. Addiction is a crushing sickness to carry. My grandfather was an alcoholic, so I know the torment that one suffers with that is not of their doing. Somepeople are just born with an addictive personality, just like some people are born gay.”

Who the hellwasthis woman?! “Did aliens land and swap out your wife with a pod person?” I asked my father. Antoine, who was a pretty quiet man, laughed out loud and then blushed deep red as Nora giggled openly. Kenan hid his snickers behind his cloth napkin. Dad reached over to pat my mother’s thigh. Mom pointed her butter knife at me just as she used to when we were at the dinner table and I would get sassy.

“Brann Michael,” she warned halfheartedly.

“How does one tell if one’s wifeisa pod person?” Dad asked to the side, loud enough for everyone at the table to hear. We all laughed.

“See, this is where my children get their cheekiness from,” Mom said with a pointed look at my father that turned into a soft look. “I’m the soft-spoken one. Do not let them tell you differently.” She poked her fork at Kenan and Antoine, who both nodded along. Smart men. It wasn’t wise to get your mother-in-law mad at you. Not that she was Kenan’s…nope, nope, nope. Not going to wade in the worry of the unknown. Terms were not important. Kenan and I were happy right now.

Our meals went well amazingly, the food was delicious, and my mother was actually charming. I sat back several times during the evening to try to suss out how she could be this nice now, but a few hours earlier she was all over the place about Kenan. So, when my dad, Kenan, Nora, and Antoine went to the band to ask if they took requests, I leaned in close to my mom, who was enjoying a cup of coffee after her cheesecake.

“Okay, so why are you being so nice to Kenan now, but when you met him, when you saw the menorah, you were such a bitch.” Her eyebrows knotted. “Well, the term fits.”

“I personally do not think it fits,” she fired back, lowering her coffee cup to its saucer. “And I do not like the insinuation that Idisliked the boy because he’s Jewish. That is simply untrue, and frankly, it’s hurtful.”

“Mom, you about shit yourself when you met him.”

“Yes, I did, because I didn’t know about him. What did you expect? I show up at your door and there’s a strange man larking around with underwear on his head. Then you announce, as bold as brass buttons, that he’s your employee whom you’re sleeping with, and that he’s Jewish. All in that tone of yours that just dares a person to be anything but happy as peach pie.”

I sat back, properly chastened, but still curious. “Fine, yeah, I may have bitten before I even barked, but you certainly acted like you disliked his faith.”

She huffed. “Brann, for goodness sake, if I were going to dislike anything about the young man, it would be his choice of headgear. He seems to be a nice man, kind, polite, and quite handsome in his way. You’re happy when you’re around him, something that we’ve not seen since Pecker Head Paulie hurt you so deeply.”

“I cannot believe I’m hearing the words pecker head come out of your mouth,” I said as she smiled just the smallest bit.

“Well, he was. The truth is not always pleasant as we know. You and I tend to say what’s on our minds. Many would say being blunt is a good thing, while many would say it’s bad. We lack compassion, or empathy, or whatever it’s called when you blow smoke up someone’s skirt. I may speak too quickly. Perhaps I should temper my tongue as your father and sister reminded me after you left, but you know that I am always honest with people, even when it’s uncomfortable to do so. So, no, I did not hold Kenan’s faith or his time battling addiction against him. What upset me most was that you didn’t tell us that you had found a new man and that he would be here. Are we so reprehensible that you couldn’t bring yourself to even pass along something this big?”

“No, of course not, I just…” And there I skidded to a stall. “I’m not sure how long this thing with Kenan will last is all. I’m trying not to put my cart in front of the horse as Dad likes to say.”

“Ah, so you’re hedging. That does seem wise given how your last breakup nearly drove you into a mental hospital.”

“I wasn’t that bad.” She shot me a flat look. “Okay, yes, I was in bad shape, but Paulie had hurt me badly.”

“I know he did, but you do tend to over-commit your whole self. You need to stop making your relationship your everything. You’re a bright, hardworking man. Take pride in your other accomplishments. Also, since we’re having this little talk, I must say that I’m worried that you’re having sex with your employee. That could turn around to bite you on your ass when things go wrong.”

I scowled. “When. Nice. So you’re predicting a fail already.”

“Brann, for goodness sake, stop being so annoying. I’m not predicting anything. I barely know the young man, but surely you must see he does carry some extensive baggage. He’s an ex-addict and a wandering soul. I’m concerned that you will attach yourself to him—”

“Like a leech?”

She frowned deeply. The band shifted to an old Christmas tune sung by Perry Como way back when or so the lead singer told us. The dancers moved more slowly. Where the rest of the family had disappeared to, I didn’t know, but I was now wishing they would come back so I could leave.

“Please stop that. I did not say anything about a leech, for goodness sake, Brann. Do you honestly think that my opinion of you is so low?” Now she looked hurt. God dammit. I shook my head, scanning the restaurant for the others. They were at the bar. Nora was peeking at us around Antoine. When I caught her, she jerked back to let her beefy husband block my view. Cool. So this was a set-up mom and son talk. My sister was so getting coalin her stocking. “I can’t hear your brains rattle. Please answer me.”

“No, I don’t honestly think you feel I’m a leech. Maybe I feel that way about myself and I just like to project it to others so I can hide in my cabin forever without the danger of being thrown over a cliff by someone I love.”

Mom blinked. I slowed my breathing by exhaling slowly.

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