Page 139 of A Dusk Of Stars

When he still doesn’t say anything, I just keep talking, albeit a little more forcefully. “When you think about it, there are many more reasons for usnotto do it than there are reasons for us to do it.”

His persistent silence getting me flushed, I come to a stop, turn to face him and grit out, “Will you say something, goddamn it?”

“I was waiting for you to get to whatreallytroubles you,” he tells me in a low, soft voice. Then he starts walking over to me. “But that’s alright. I have all the patience in the world, Anna.”

I frown at him.

He takes a pen and a piece of paper from his pocket and says, “Why don’t we make a list?”

There’s something in his voice that piques my curiosity. “Yeah, why don’t we?” I agree, motioning for him to start. Put ‘lying asshole’ right on top while you’re at it, I think to myself.

He does start writing stuff down, but then he just rips the paper in half and locks eyes with me. “There,” he says as he drops the pieces to the ground. “Reasons we shouldn’t be together don’t interest me, Anna. I love you and I just want to be with you, wherever that takes me.”

The combination of ignoring the elephant in the room and all this sudden sweet-talking… It angers me. “Be that as it may, the way you see the world… It’s just so different from the wayIsee it and that’s important to me.”

There’s both hurt and defiance in the look he throws me, making me shake my head and soften my voice. “Look, you saved me, Jericho.”

He grits his teeth and looks away, as if he’s not exactly agreeing with the statement. “No, you did,” I insist, “selflessly, and I’ll forever be grateful for that, but you still think people should just let the world burn—”

“That’s not true,” he snaps and quickly collects himself, looking deeper into my eyes. “Not anymore at least.” He sighs and throws his arms up. “Look, I’m not gonna lie. I’d still chooseyouover the world and do it without a second thought, but youhavemade me want to be a better man and there’s no turning back now.”

“Really?”

He doesn’t say anything. He frowns, then takes his phone out and dials a number without bringing it to his ear.

It’s Colin’s voice I hear from the other side of the line. “Hello, Mister—”

“Colin, what did we talk about this morning?”

“Um, the plans for the shelters for homeless minors. Are you alright—”

“Thank you, Colin.” He hangs up and says, a touch of hesitation in his voice, “The dirty money being put to good use, I thought even the Chosen One would approve. And there’sa lotmore that can be done.”

I just look at him for a second. “I’m happy for you,” I say, swallowing around a lump in my throat.

It’s sudden, the movement that ends with him pressed against me, his arms around my back and his breath tickling my ear. “I want you to be happy forus,” he whispers. “I’ll be giving you all the space you want, but you need to know, there is no end to my love for you, Anna.”

“No end, really?” I demand as I pull away and take a few steps back. I fold my arms. “Tell me then, how many times did you accuse me of hiding something?”

Surprise flashes through his eyes. Then it turns into understanding, making his eyebrows pull down and his voice drop. “Is that what—”

“Yeah, it is,” I snap. “I know I lied to you,many times, and I’m sorry for every time I did. I know I hid stuff from you, and I’m sorry about that, too.” I get in his face and I fail to stop myself from letting some of the hurt surface. “Butyou, you hid somethingso big, Jericho.”

For a second, he just blinks at me. “I could tell you were confused, Anna,” he rushes to say, taking a step closer as worry and regret start to twist his features. “I just didn’t realize you were hurt. You can’t even imagine how sorry—”

“Fine, you’re sorry,” I cut him off. “How long,that’swhat I want to know. How long did you know? Did Lorcan tell you when he blackmailed you to come here?”

He looks away for a second. “MacArthur never even mentioned you to me,” he says as he turns his eyes back onto me, his teeth gritting, “but I knew from the moment I first saw you. I mean, Ifeltit the moment I first laid eyes on you. I only realized what was going on when you broke the glass and I felt the energy coming off you.” He gives me a pleading look. “Please believe me when I say I didn’t realize this would affect you in any way, simply because—”

“You’re not being serious,” I protest with a scoff. “You didn’t realize this would affect me?Do you know how many times during the past year I’ve found myself wondering if I’m losing my goddamn mind? But easy foryou, you knew exactly what was going on with you all that time.”

“Easyfor me?” he grits out as he gets in my face, swinging an arm to the side. “It was pure fucking torture. One minute I’m minding my own business, the next it’sallabout Anna Novakallthe fucking time,” he rants, his voice turning mocking, “replaying her words, craving her attention, dreaming about her wanting me the way I wanted her.” He shakes his head and digs his fingers into his hair only to lower his arms again. “I did so many things Ireallydidn’t want to do, I hired people to dig up info on you, I found myself stalking you when you stopped coming to classes, I failed to resist you that night in the forest like I’ve never failed at anything else in my—”

“Yeah, I’m sorry it was hard for you,” I cut him off, his words only putting salt on my own wound, “but I want to know why you never told me.”

He lets out a pent-up breath and shrugs. “The same reason I didn’t think my not telling you would affect you. I was convinced it was a one-way street.”

“Really?”

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