Page 118 of A Dusk Of Stars

She hesitates. “I won’t be doing a thing. It’s all you. Just take this in your hand and, once you’re with your wolf, stab yourself in the heart with it.”

The very thought fills me with dread, but then there are the guilt and the rage and the urgency and everything else I’m feeling at the moment.

If I want to save everyone, if I want to stay alive, if I want to get my fucking revenge… It’s not like I have a choice. I take a deep breath and reach for the moon stone.

“Be careful, Anna,” Serra says just before I take it in my hand.

The next thing I know, the world around me disappears and I find myself in a familiar darkness.

***

Tell me,my wolf’s voice booms from behind the bars,how is it that you still have the audacity to come here?

“I need your help,” I say as I take a few steps closer, determination in my voice.

This is not the way to ask for it.

Somehow, I know she’s referring to the moon stone in my hand. I frown. “What do you mean?”

You think forcing a connection is a good idea?she asks.

I have to fight not to lose my cool. “I’m not going to force you,” I tell her in a forceful voice. “I just want your help.”

Alright, Anna,she says, stepping out of the shadows to stare at me.I’ll help.

What the… I breathe a sigh of relief.

On one condition.

“Anything you need,” I rush to say.

Tell me what happened to your last incarnation.

As soon as she says that, these images start flashing before my eyes, but they’re all so vague and at the same time, so powerful, I need to swat them away. “I can’t do that,” I say through gritted teeth. “I don’t remember.”

I only get silence.

“Seriously?” I demand, taking an angry step forward. “That’s what you’re asking of me? The only thing Ican’tgive you?”

I’m sorry, Anna, she just says, and moves to walk away.

“What kind of bullshit is this?” I yell at her, the rage starting to course through me again. “All I want is to fix things for everyone.”

She stops to throw me a look over her shoulder.That's what you always say.

This powerful surge of fear burrows deep inside me. “What do you mean?” I ask in a breathless voice.

It's sad, truly and deeply sad, how much you're resisting to feel it all. I know it's terrible, Anna. It's beyond terrible, in fact, what we've had to live through. It's not an excuse though, because this is the most destructive weakness of them all — to try to do it all yourself just for fear of getting hurt if you let anyone in.

Something inside me snaps. “You forget yourself, wolf,” I grit out.

I’m warning you, Anna.

But I’m already lifting the moon stone, squeezing it tight as I turn my fist inward. “No. It’s notyouwho has the final word here.” And with that, I stab myself in the heart, feeling my wolf freeze.

***

When I come to, my vision is blurred and my chest is burning. Taking pained breaths, I push myself off the floor, vaguely aware of being back in Serra’s office.

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