Page 100 of A Dusk Of Stars

It doesn’t help that I’m finding myself feeling cold to the bone — as if all the warmth has been sucked out from the world around me. I keep glancing at him even when the two of themaren’tbeing disruptive — my mind buzzing in search of potential reasons for this change in behavior.

Could he be mad about something?

It’s all driving me so crazy, I end up taking my phone out of my pocket and pulling up our chat. I skim the last interaction I had with him before this, looking for clues.

I frown. It was just me asking if we could skip training for a week or so. He was proving to be a distraction and I felt Ishould just put a pause on it for the time being, giving him my exhausting list of obligations as the reason for doing so.

And he did make a point of letting me know he was against me doing all this in the first place, but that was basically him saying he couldn’t care less, in a manner very typical of him. There’s nothing else I can think of that he could be mad about.

So what’s all this now?

I hear him shift in his seat and I can’t help but steal another glance. I look away, but I think I see him catch it.

No, he didn’t, I’m making stuff up.

Can I give you some advice?my wolf’s voice booms inside my head.

I smile. “So you’re only willing to do it when no one’s asked you? Figures.”

And I know I didn’t make her angry, but she does stay silent. I imagine her quirking an eyebrow at me.

“Yes,” I rush to say, “give me any advice you want to give me. Please.”

Either stop glancing at him every three seconds like some teenage girl, or leave and have him come with you.

“Yeah,” I mutter, “I don’t know if I should be doing that anymore.”

Really?she asks, sounding genuinely intrigued.Why is that?

I hesitate for a second, throwing another glance at Bane, which he definitely catches this time. “I feel he might be… a bad influence.”

Bad influence?she echoes. There’s suspicion in her voice.How exactly are you letting him influence you?

“It’s just… Sure, he could be extraordinary, if only his heart was in the right place. It’snotthough, which makes him less than suitable company for someone with my values. Besides, I knew all along that this will have an expiration date.”

I see. Then do whatever you want.

It makes me frown. “Is that it?That’syour advice? Do whatever you want.”

There's a moment of silence before she says,Seems to be the only piece of advice you ever take into account.

And with that, she disappears.

I have to fight not to let out a scoff. I try to go back to work, but the words on the papers in front of me refuse to come into focus.

Especially when he clears his throat, and with the corner of my eye, I see him toss one stack of papers to the side and grab another, leaning back in his chair and rolling his sleeves up.

Before I can stop myself, I look up, and I find him skimming the papers with a pen in his hand and a serious look on his face. It’s all so sexy — the way his eyebrows are pulled down a little, the shape of his lips, the curve of his collarbone showing under the shirt, that maddeningly deft way in which he spins the pencil around his fingers — that I simply can’t look away.

The next thing I know, he’s looking up, his eyebrows shooting up a little as he locks eyes with me, making me realize I’m still staring.

For a second, we look at each other. To try to save face, I throw him a smile and go back to staring at my papers. I feel his eyes linger on me, but I don’t look up again.

Instead, I imagine dragging him to my room instead of having sex with him at the gym as usual, wondering what that would be like. It wouldn’t be quick for sure, like it never is with him, except those few times we hooked up in random places and almost ended up getting caught. But in my room… we wouldn’t have to worry about anyone interrupting.

I frown when I realize I’m still thinking about this instead of working.

It’s fine. I’m just a little wound up, I tell myself. After all, a week is by far the longest I haven’t had sex since that first real training session with him.

---