Page 197 of House of Lilith

“Look,” I start, “I haven’t even thought about anyone else in a very long time now, since the First Game.” My voice grows rough with longing when I lean in a little to say, “Because there’s this little vixen that just won’t stay out of my head, making my blood rush around whenever I lay my eyes on her.”

She looks up at me and there’s something in her eyes that’s telling me I might be getting through to her.

So I dare to say, taking a step back and raising my voice a little, “If you really don’t want to be with me, fine. I’ll get out of your hair.” I pause for a second, turning more serious than I’ve ever been as I reach into my pocket to take her ribbon out, making her look at it before I lock eyes with her again. “But if you’re walking away from this, you’re doing itknowing, without a shadow of doubt, that there’s no one else for me anymore, that you’re everything I’ve ever wanted and more.”

There’s a moment of silence before she drops her arms to her sides. “Okay,” she says, “even if I believed you, your saying you want me, what do you wantfromme?”

It makes hope burst into a flame inside me. “Everything,” I come to whisper in her ear, my heart starting to pound when she doesn’t pull away. “I wanted you so badly,” I start in a low, rushed voice, wrapping my fingers gently around her wrist and pulling her a little closer to me, “I was prepared to go along with any charade you made me go along with. But I don't want to have to do that anymore.”

And she stiffens a little, but she’s still not pulling away and I just keep whispering in her ear, my voice turning into a low growl, “I want to be able to see you when I fuckingwantto see you, I want to know you're thinking about me when we're not together, I want to make love to you, slowly, in a bed,ourbed.”

My grip on her wrist tightens and still, she doesn’t pull away. “And sure,” I keep going with passion in my voice, “you've only known the player me, but if we do this, I don't want to share, with anyone,ever, not physically and not emotionally. I'myours, body and soul, and I want the same from you.”

For a second, there’s silence. Then she pulls away, and, to my surprise, I find tears in her eyes.

“No,” she snaps in an angry, choked-up voice, making my eyebrows pull down. “And you want to know why? Because this is what youdo, you asshole.”

It leaves me a little dumbfounded, her choice of words. But before I can ask what the hell she’s talking about, she takes another step back, throwing daggers at me as she says with bitterness in her voice, “You make me feel all special, like you wouldn’t change a thing about me, and then you go and tell me I’m a lot.”

What the…

“Remember that?” she drawls angrily, tears still in her eyes. And then she almost makes me laugh by seemingly trying to imitate my voice. “‘You’rea lot. And you’re like thatall the fucking time. It’s exactly the kind of thing I try to avoid.’”

Then she gets in my face, jabbing her finger into her temple, “They’re here,burnedinto my brain, those words. Youasshole.”

So that’s what this is all about, I think to myself. And it hurts, it hurts like hell, to see her in pain like that, but at the same time… It makes me so fucking happy.

Without another moment of hesitation, I grab her by the waist, I tighten my grip when she tries to fight me off, and I bury my face in her hair, whispering, “I was hurting, love. You were making me feel things and want things I’d never felt or wanted before, which got me scared as hell. Then I saw you with that fucking Aalders and I lost it.”

Feeling her relax in my arms, I let the emotions come pouring out as I keep talking into her ear, “I fucking lost it. And I wanted you to tell me it’smeyou want, not him, but I wasn’t going to ask. Instead, I tried to get a reaction out of you in the most childish, pathetic way possible. To make you tell me howyoufeel without saying anything first. I’m so sorry, love.”

And with that, I force myself to take a step back, her somber, teary eyes remaining on me as I work on steadying my breathing so I can show her exactly how determined I am.

“But I’m done with that shit now,” I say. “So, yes, Idothink you’re a lot, all the fucking time.” And that earns me this look, but I just keep going. “But if you let me, I’m going to show you exactly how big of a compliment that is. It’s one of the things I love most about you and I wouldn’t want it any other way.”

And I just keep standing there, waiting for her reaction with bated breath.

It makes me breathe a sigh of relief when I see her eyes soften and her muscles relax.

The next thing I know, she’s getting on her toes and throwing her arms around my shoulders. Eagerly, I wrap mine around her waist and pull her to myself.

And I feel myself nudged to lower my head a little, my heart throbbing in anticipation.

“You want to know,” she leans to whisper in my ear, making me hold my breath, “whether I think about you when we’re not together.”

A shiver runs down my spine even before she says, her voice low, soft and longing, “I think about you all the time. When I’m alone and when I’m with others, when I wake up in the morning and when I go to bed at night.”

For a second, the words make my mind go blank. Then they send an avalanche of pleasure crashing over me and I find myself grabbing her ass to lift her up, growling into her ear, “Oh fuck, Nyx, you don’t know how good it feels to hear that.”

And my lips find hers and we kiss, deeply and passionately, as I start trying to tear the clothes off her.

She stops me, wrapping her legs tighter around me so she can pull away a little. “I missed you, Dahrian,” she whispers, my name on her lips making me let out a growl. “It was so painful thinking I didn’t matter to you.”

I make her look at me. “You don’t just matter to me. You’reeverythingto me.”

And I go to lay her on her bed, I take her shirt off and I come to hover over her, kissing her all over as I whisper all the things I wasn’t able to say until now, her breathing turning more ragged and her grip on my back tighter with every thing I say. How beautiful she is. How I fucking love her lips, her breasts, her ass, her legs. How they drive me crazy, her voice and the way she moves.

Barely containing myself, I lower my head to take a bite out of her belly and I pull her boxers off her, making her suck in a breath and my dick start throbbing under my pants. And I get on the floor before her, putting my head between her legs and her legs on my shoulders. And I start to kiss, lick, and tease all over, her moaning filling my ears and making me desperate for more.

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