Page 119 of House of Lilith

“What do you mean?”

He shakes his head. “Some shifters are born with animal souls that are older than others.” Shrugging his shoulders, he admits, “No one really knows how these things work, but it’s still a fact. And the older the soul, the harder it is to keep under control.”

“Let me guess,” I cut in, squinting at him a little, “Dahrian’s fox has an old soul.”

“Yes,” he says in a somber voice. “I believe it’s the main reason he got chosen for an alpha at such an early age.”

And that’s all fine, I think to myself.Still, it doesn’t answer my question. “It’s dangerous though?” I dare to ask, just not about Dahrian in particular. “So shifters like that sometimes have to keep their animals away from people?”

Ricky thinks for a second. “Not Dahrian,” he replies with a shake of his head. “I mean, itwastrue, when I said he didn’t have it easy. But this has also forced him to become better than most. And if he didn’t show great control,” he keeps saying with absolute conviction, “they never would’ve picked him to lead the pack.”

“I see,” I say, forcing a normal voice. So I was right, I think to myself, when I thought the reason I was given today was bullshit.

And I dare to throw a single glance back at his circle, only to see the girl with highlights now standing right next to him. “Well, good for him,” I add as I turn back to Ricky, fighting a sinking feeling.

I find Ricky looking at him as well. “Yeah,” he says, seeming to be caught up in some kind of pensive admiration. “It’s the best thing a man can possibly have. The ability to protect his own from whatever harm may befall them.”

For a second, I just look at him. And I find myself wanting to leave the party, this coldness growing inside me. But when he turns to look at me again, throwing me another warm smile, I get the need to at least make it so this ends on a positive note forhim.

So I lean in, I give a smile back and I ask, “Tell me, Ricky, how’re you liking it here,really?”

And I watch his mouth crack into a grin, but it’s at that exact moment that I hear Nikolay bellow, “Hey, sis, over here.”

*

I’m on my fourth whiskey, standing in a circle around a fire with Ricky to my left, Nikolay to his and Hilde standing across from us, chatting with one of the O’Malley brothers. I myself am trying my hardest to listen to Ricky talk about, as he says, thecoolestprofessor he ever had.

But my mind keeps wandering, aimlessly and hopelessly.

I haven’t seen or heard him in, like, forever. I’m starting to think he’s no longer at the party, which, in turn, has me obsessing over where heis.

Forcing myself to snap out of it, I tune back in just as Ricky says, “Andthat’swhen he decided he wouldn’t be teaching anymore.”

“Wow,” I say, feeling burning shame for not actually listening, “what a story.”

It’s then that I realize I really don’t want to be here anymore.

“Itisa good one, yeah,” Ricky replies with excitement written all over his face.

Then he pauses to look deeper into my eyes. “But you see,” he adds with a knowing smile, “despite the fact you now know I’m of royal blood, you really don’t have to be sucking up to me like this.”

Now, that actually makes me let out a laugh.

“I’m just gonna run to the bathroom,” he says with a smile.

And at the same time my nose fills with a certain scent, his eyes dart to a point behind my back.

I watch him give a little wave with a grin from ear to ear and I freeze, knowing exactly who it is he’s just waved to.

And it makes me want to beg him to stay, but he just throws me another smile and leaves for the bathroom.

I find myself standing next to Nikolay, who’s showing something on his phone to a guy to his left. And I have to force myself to look over my shoulder. Where, of course, I see His Hotness strolling over with his hands in his pockets. And I can’t hear it over the music, but I can tell he’s whistling.

Fuck, I think as I turn back. The only thing worse than him not being here at all…

I take my phone out of my clutch and I busy myself with checking my messages, but now I’m starting to hear the whistling, and it just keeps drawing closer until it’s almost in my ear.

It makes me frown, when it stops and I feel him come to stand next to me.Me, of all the fucking spots in the circle.

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