Page 17 of Bound By Obsession

Nixon’s words repeat on a loop. It’s that glimmer of hope which keeps me on the instructed road. There was no time towrite down Nixon’s directions and he expressly told me not to. No one can know, and I’m certain that if Avery wasn’t his little princess, she’d be making this journey on her own. At least with us, she has fall guys. Men that will jump in front of bullets and offer themselves up in her path. Now all we need is Wyatt back in our fold and I’ll be leading the petition to get the fuck out of dodge.

Ever the diligent one, Dax turns to me from the passenger seat and looks too closely at my rigid, stiff posture. “Let me know when you need a break. I’m happy to take over so you can close your eyes for a while,” he offers.

“The open road is the best kinda medicine.” I reply hollowly, settling down further and attempting to spread my legs comfortably. I’m protective of who drives my SUV at the best of times but when I’ve got precious cargo, I don’t trust anyone else. I need the control. Hands seize my shoulders with a reassuring squeeze.

“Pull over Hux,” Avery purrs. “We all need a break.” I shake my head.

“We’ll be at our next stop soon.” Catching sight of her concerned gaze in the mirror, I sigh. “I’m good guys, I promise. It’s just up the road and then I’ll rest.” Those nimble hands stay on my shoulders, kneading gently until my spine eases. At the sight of my small smile, Avery relaxes back into her seat, returning to Garrett’s shitty jokes and Axel’s lingering touches. Miles of open road fly by easily after that.

The sky is a murky purple hue by the time I pull into a motel’s tiny parking lot. The shabby, run down building has stepped straight out of a serial killer’s catalog. Two storeys high, looming and depressing. Only a handful of curtains have a dim orange glow behind them, the rest of them in complete darkness.

Switching off the engine, Dax slips out of the passenger seat first and audibly cracks his back. His afro is getting longer,starting to poke out in all directions. In a pair of low-slung sweatpants and oversized tee, he heads to the reception. I’m last out of the cab, standing off to the side. Avery stretches, each movement tracked by the hungry eyes of Garrett and Axel lingering nearby. Her legs are hugged by green cropped leggings that clash with an orange hoodie I’m sure isn’t hers, judging by the excess of material around her petite body. Her hair is trapped in a low ponytail, wisps of blonde spread over her shoulders.

Dax is back within a few minutes, his voice carrying as he approaches. “They’ve only got rooms with double beds. I got two and figured we’ll rotate.” Tossing Axel a pair of keys, Dax tries to give me the other set.

“I’m gonna hang out here for a while, stretch my legs and that.” I hold my hand up, glad when Dax buys it and shrugs. Avery tries to protest but she can’t hide the yawn that pulls at her mouth. “Head to bed, Little Swan.” Summoning a smile, she pauses to kiss my cheek before being led away by Dax. I stare at their joined hands, a pang of jealousy hitting me where it shouldn’t. Somehow while the rest of us weren’t looking, Dax has stepped into the role of Avery’s comfort blanket.

Once the door clicks closed behind him, I slump against the SUV and cross my arms. Exhaustion racks my body, both from being vigilant and from the mental stress I’m once again carrying. When it’s quiet and I have time alone like this, I tend to wonder how things would have been if we’d all simply been students - invested in partying too hard, passing midterms and competing for Avery’s attention.

Not that it matters anyway. We’re here, miles from any type of world we know and secretly competing anyway. I’m surprised by the lack of fight Garrett puts up, slipping into the room next door with Axel just behind. I scoff to myself, clenching my jaw. I’ve been driving for nine hours straight, proving my vow towatch over her and that’s exactly what I’m going to do. From this vantage point, no one can creep up on the room and no mysterious notes can be put beneath the door without me seeing them approach.

There were fifteen or so rooms on each level with metallic steps leading to the second floor. The walls probably were a fresh cream when originally painted in the 60s, but now the only hint of color is of the brick peeking through the peeling, murky exterior. Most of the windows are too dirty to see through and those earlier feelings of trepidation have come back with a vengeance.

Reaching through my open window, I lean inside and pull out the pack of cigarettes Dax has most likely left behind on purpose. I’ve noticed he hasn’t been smoking half as much since Avery appeared in our lives and I thought he’d kicked the habit, but the small box in my hand says otherwise. We all need our vices.

Flicking open the lid, I find seven sticks and a yellow lighter inside. Should be enough to get me through the night since there’s no coffee machine in sight. Leaning against the driver’s side door, I pop a cigarette in between my lips and light it. The bitter taste is akin to acid but I need something to keep me going. Increasingly, the thought of digesting actual food has been making me feel more and more nauseous, so I’ve resolved to small scraps here and there at Avery’s request. Once only the cigarette butt remains between my fingers, I flick it across the concrete and climb back into the SUV.

In the glow of a streetlamp, I shift my eyes from window to window across the two floors, checking for curtain twitchers. A brass number six hangs on Avery’s door with a paper ‘Do Not Disturb’ sign swaying slightly around the handle. There’s several cars in the car park, most of them old bangers so my white, shiny SUV sticks out like a diamond in a pawnbrokers. Another goodreason for me to play bodyguard out here, otherwise my beloved vehicle would more than likely be missing by morning.

Pushing my seat back to gain more leg room, my eye-lids begin to feel heavy. I give my head a fierce shake, my wavy hair whipping around my cheeks. Pulling another cigarette from the pack, I tease my tongue between my teeth at the thought of the offending tar-like taste filling my mouth again. Of the damage I’m doing to my insides with more nicotine than nutrition fueling me.

I’m doing it again - just like I told Axel. Sabotaging myself by making sure I’m in no fit state to guard anyone, putting both Avery and my brothers at risk. As if having a reason to blame my misgivings on will make it easier. But what choice do I have? Avery needs protecting and if that means I lose myself in the process, so be it.

***

A repetitive buzzing stirs me into waking, my head suddenly jolting upright. It’s pitch black within the cab, except for a glow emanating from my door pocket. Grabbing my phone, I blink against the sleep blurring my eyes, fumbling for the ceiling light.

Avery:Are you planning on staying out there all night?

Avery:There’s a Huxley-sized space free in this bed.

I run a hand down my face and glance around the inside of the SUV. A perfectly rounded hole is burnt into the edge of my leather seat, the offending cigarette butt lying by my foot on the floor.Fuck.

Avery:My backside is cold. Stop watching the room and come watch me sleep instead.

I freeze, staring at the screen for a while. Apprehension fills me, a stirring in my chest coming to life. I’d forgotten what it felt like. To be desired and for me not to be doing all of the chasing. Damn, it makes me feelwanted.

Avery:Please, Hux. My butt is getting frostbite.

I snort on a laugh that had no business escaping me so easily.

Huxley:I’m fairly sure you can’t get frostbite on your ass.

Avery:Are you willing to run that risk? It would be such a waste of squats.

Looking outside, there’s been no change. The streetlamps glow in each corner of the building, illuminating what would be the darkest areas. There are no new vehicles, suggesting only those who had already checked in are present. It would take a psychic to have known where we were heading, especially since I didn’t check into the motel Nixon suggested. My small act of defiance, just in case my instincts about Nixon happen to be right. Three dots appear on the screen.

Avery:I’ll make you a deal. You come in here or I’ll come out there. I’ve been in your trunk, I’m certain we could both fit in it.

---