Page 78 of Tenure

My heart sputters to a stop, my brain immediately launching into a mile long list of reasons why we can’t.

I’m still seventeen.

You’re my first boyfriend.

You’re so much older.

People won’t get it.

It’s not something people do.

My parents.

And then the insecurities start scratching away.

He’ll get tired of you.

You’ll be divorced before you’re twenty.

This can never work.

But he reaches into his pocket, pulls out a little velvet box, and pops it open with a creak. Inside is a black band with beautiful gold-leaf filigree, encrusted all the way around with diamonds.

It’s dark. And different. And so unfuckingbelievably perfect that I can never imagine myself wearinganythingelse.

“Yes,” I breathe.

Because if anyone can prove this equation, it’s us.

53

Epilogue

I’m not sure why I’m nervous, but I am.

“Relax,” SJ says. “You’re fine. It’sfine.”

I take a deep breath and she puts her hand on my forearm and gives it a squeeze.

“You’re going to be fine, Kiernan.”

It’s the first day of the fall semester. My morning classes have all been bullshit—outlines and a review of the syllabus and bad dad jokes—but SJ has been enjoying herself immensely. Our afternoons look vastly different; she’s on her way toA History of Vampires in Literature,and I’m on my way toNumerical Methods of Partial Differential Equations.

I hover in the doorway, afraid to go in.

She rolls her eyes. “Kiernan, I really don’t know why you’re so nervous. You’re—”

“Kiernan,” he purrs.

That's why I'm nervous…

I close my eyes at the sound of his voice.Why does he always fucking sound like he’s licking me?My brain is flooded with images from this morning—his idea of afirst day of schoolsend-off—and my lips part, breath quickening.

SJ clears her throat. “James,” she says drily.

“Sarah-Jean.”

I can picture him nodding curtly as he says her name. He won’t call her SJ—not since she gave him shit for proposing on the floor of a bathroom—and they’ve been circling each other like wolves all summer. I roll my eyes behind my closed eyelids.

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