Page 66 of A Sun Scorched Bloom

Sketched in black charcoal was a woman with her child. A woman who looked so much like Azalea, Gray would have thought it was a self portrait. The woman’s plump lips were drawn in a gentle smile, her long light hair braided in a simple plait over her shoulder. But it was the baby in her arms that made Gray pause.

He would know those eyes anywhere. At any age, in any universe, in any lifetime. His mate’s eyes, wide and naïve, but not in a way that could be considered an insult. They were young, hopeful, unaware of the evils of the world that lurked outside her mother’s embrace.

Lea couldn’t speak, and she bit down on her knuckle as she tried to control her sobs. Gray had never seen her so fragile and so strong all at the same time.

"It’s clear that she loved you," he said gently, running his hands down Lea’s arms and resting his chin on the top of her head.

"She’s a stranger." Lea cleared her throat, discreetly swiping a tear away. "She gave me away before she even had time to love me."

"She gave you to Adelaide. A woman who she knew was capable of loving you more than her own life. She gave you to someone who would keep you safe. For a mother to give up her child—" Gray winced as the memory of his mother’s screams after his sister’s death reverberated in his skull—"There is no greater act of love."

"She could have told me," Lea whispered. "I deserved to know."

"You did. But," Gray walked around the couch and angled his body to face Lea. "She just wanted to protect you. I wish my mother had found a way to save my sister."

"That’s different." Lea’s fingers curled into her palms, her nails cutting into her skin. The scent of metal hit his nostrils, and he reached forward, slowly and tenderly prying open her fingers and sending his healing magic into the crescent-shaped cuts.

"It’s not. If I had to make the choice to protect you or allow you to die with me, even if it meant being apart from you, I know what I would choose. Even if you’d hate me for it."

"But I wouldn’t want to live that life." She stood abruptly. "I wouldn’twantto live without you."

"And I refuse to drag you to your death before you are really able tolive." he lifted the picture, holding it to the side.

"Can you look at this baby, and truly,honestlysay that she is better off dead, just so that she can stay with her mother?"

"That’s not fair," Lea’s lips trembled.

"If we had a daughter, if the gods were kind enough to bless us with a child, can you not tell me you’d do exactly the same?"

Lea’s hand drifted to her stomach. She wasn’t pregnant. Gray would have scented it. And regardless, he ensured the tonic he drank daily would prevent conceiving a child. He would never gamble bringing a baby into this world during a war, would never put them at risk, but the thought of it…

"I’d do anything for my baby," Lea conceded, a tear trailing from the boundary of her eyelashes. "But that doesn’t make it hurt less."

Gray grabbed Lea’s arms as she collapsed against him, finally allowing the sobs to break free from her chest.

"I know it doesn’t, Little Flower." Gray crooned against her hair, soaking in her pain and pushing back every ounce of reassurance and calming energy he could find. He flooded their bond with words he knew Lea wasn’t willing to hear at the moment: you are mine, I will never hurt you, you are stronger than you know. But instead of speaking those words aloud, he let her cry out every ounce of her pain on his shoulder, her sorrow soaking through his shirt and wetting his skin.

"Nothing in this life we have lived is fair. Feel it all. Let it mold you. Mourn what you have lost, and when you are ready, forge it into a weapon. Your mother loved you, just as your Mom did. You have a family, Lea. Janelle and Erik, Emma and Thomas. They love you. I think even Noah has become rather fond of you."

Lea sniffled, wiping away fat tears and the snot running from her nose, nodding her head. "I know. I know they do."

"That doesn’t mean you can’t be sad. But they would do anything for you."

She nodded again.

"And me? I would destroy the world for you. I would leave this cursed place nothing but embers and ash. Extinguish every bit of life to keep you safe. I would offer my soul to the gods, if only to allow you tolive."

Lea pressed her face against Gray’s chest, allowing his strong, muscular arms to envelop her completely. She continued to fall apart, trusting that Gray could hold up the world for her. And dammit, if that would help her, even a bit, he would do it.

"What do you need, Little Flower?" Gray asked quietly, wishing he could take her pain away.

Lea was silent for several minutes, muffling her cries against his chest. She took several long, shuddering breaths before tilting her head to meet Gray’s gaze.

Her eyes were swollen, bloodshot and puffy, and Gray trailed the back of his fingers against the evidence of her grief.

"What do you need?" he asked again.

"I need to end this," Lea answered softly. "I need to know exactly who I am, what I am capable of, and I need us to find a way to kill your father and brother so that nothing like this ever happens to anyone else, ever again."

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