Dull answer.
Yvgeny almost got to his feet, irritated by these half-hearted attempts to get someone from law enforcement inside his organization.
The first couple had been entertaining at least. Both women, both of whom had tried to use sex appeal to tempt him into hiring them. This was the third FBI agent he’d interviewed. The NYPD had only sent two. All women, but for this lone male applicant/undercover plant.
Hundreds of years of experience had taught Yvgeny how to tell the difference between nervous energy because someone needed a job and nervous energy because your life was on the line if you got the job.
Yvgeny sighed. He absolutely hated this. The interviews had been tedious, time consuming, and terribly boring. Hiring a new assistant was more aggravating than getting shot.
The kid cleared his throat.
Yvgeny opened his eyes, only realizing then that he’d had them closed and had one hand pinching the bridge of his nose like he had a headache.
“Are you all right, sir?” the kid asked.
Yvgeny looked at the resume in front of him again. Not kid, Brian Stettler.
“Mr. Stettler,” Yvgeny began. “Why did you apply for this job?”
“I need to pay rent,” the young man said with a grin that was almost natural, but it didn’t quite reach his eyes.
Seriously? That was the best response he could come up with?
“That is a horrible answer,” Yvgeny told him with no finesse at all. “Do you actually want a job, or is the FBI forcing you to go undercover due to your age and lack of seniority?”
Brian Stettler froze, then his face drained slowly of blood until he was as white as the paper his resume was printed on. “Excuse me?” he asked in a small voice.
“I am curious about one thing,” Yvgeny said conversationally. “Why did they stop sending women to apply for this job? Did they suddenly wonder if I was gay or something?”
Stettler’s mouth dropped open.
“Oh, for the love of God,” Yvgeny muttered, raising his gaze to heaven. When he looked at the kid again, fear was the only thing on the young man’s face.
“First,” Yvgeny said, because he needed to clear the air between him, the kid, and whoever might be listening in. “I’m a boob and ass man. Second, I knew who you were and who you work for before you ever walked into my office. Third...” Yvgeny shook his head. “I’d actually like to hire you. You kept your mother’s home-based, online business organized and profitable until she sold it last year for enough money to retire and then some.”
Brian blinked, then a frown brought his eyebrows low over his eyes. “You investigated my mother?”
“Of course, I did. Deep background checks are standard at Breznik Enterprises.” Yvgeny said with a wave of one hand. “I also know that your older brother is a fuckwit who hasn’t held a job for longer than six months. Did you know he owes money to some very unsavory people? They’re going to go after your mother to pay for those debts in about a week.”
“No, I didn’t know—wait.” The young man held up a hand, palm up. “You know who I am, and you still want to hire me?”
“Yes.”
“Why?”
“Because my last assistant was murdered in the explosion that destroyed my previous office. You have the training and situational awareness to, hopefully, spot shenanigans before they blow up.” Yvgeny said. “And, because I’m sick and tired of fending off these ham-handed attempts by law enforcement to get an undercover agent inside my business operations.”
“Shenanigans?”
Yvgeny enjoyed seeing shock on the kid’s face. He did it so well.
“I’m trying not to offend whoever may be listening in on this interview. Would you prefer another term? Fuckery, perhaps, or would attempted-murder sound better in a report to your superiors?”
“No, um...shenanigans is fine.”
“You are aware of the risks, and there are obviously some big ones, to working for me. If I hire you, and you’re able to make your superiors satisfied that I’m not doing anything illegal, perhaps they’ll stop wasting my time with their annoying investigations. And, I think you might do a decent job.”
Yvgeny waited for the kid to ask another question, but he stayed silent, thinking. Thinking so hard, Yvgeny was surprised there wasn’t smoke coming out of his ears.