Page 96 of Jingle Belle's Biker

A coolness licks my skin.

“We’re going to have a celebration in the garden,” Mellie says, “If you want to join.”

“I might.”

That’s when I turn.

My heart sinks.

Belle hasn’t just stepped back.

She’s gone.

“Belle?” I knock on her door again. “Belle.”

She finally opens it. She just looks at me, waiting.

Fuck.

“I know you’re mad at me. And I’m fucking sorry, but you’ll keep your place, so will everyone?—”

“You didn’t tell me who you were, and I know we’ve been over it.” She swallows, glancing past me, and she sighs and gestures me in.

I’m not staying. This is a goodbye. I knew it the moment I came back.

Sure, everyone could have handled it without me. I set it up that everything would be done and dusted and homes secured through my friends, through hers. I know how to work a network, how to make things work in the way I need them to.

It’s why I can navigate the sometimes complicated and razor-edged paths of clubhouse life with all the clubs I interact with. Sort of like being a member of none, but ally of all.

I can make shit happen.

I didn’t need to be here.

Gravel, Sin, and the rest had it.

Maybe it would have been easier without me.

I don’t fucking know.

All I know is I need to be.

To make sure.

To see Belle. All that pretty red hair, those green eyes, the soft mouth and smile I crave. I wanted to smell her skin again.

Me here isn’t even about me wanting to fuck her one last time because of course I do. No, I’m here because I can’t go without seeing her.

“You’re going, aren’t you?” she asks.

I consider her words, what they’re asking of me, and yeah, I’m leaving but she wants confirmation. Me to say goodbye. Fuck, I don’t know if I have that goodbye in me.

Much better to let it be, we both know. It seems more palatable if I don’t say it.

“I wanted to see if you’re fine.”

“I’m not a child,” she says fiddling with a button on her chunky cardigan. Even day off from work she looks ready to teach.

Sexy in unexpected ways.

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