Page 21 of Absolution

“FUCK!” I scream as soon as I slide into my truck. Anger courses through my body like raging rapids. Ratchet has been here less than twenty-four hours, and he’s already managed to get me fired from a job I desperately need. That son of a bitch thinks he can bulldoze his way into my life, and expects me to be fine with it.

It’s not fucking fine. He nearly cost me my job at Willie’s last night with his back-alley rendezvous “You are mine” bullshit. I was honestly surprised that Willie bought his fake as fuck story and let him back in the place. Thinking about him talking with my boss, while I worked, makes my blood boil.

The nerve of that man to do to this to me, under the guise of protecting me. I don’t need his protection anymore because with it comes a price that I don’t think I am willing to pay again. My heart on his platter just waiting to be devoured.

My hands beat against the weathered leather of the steering wheel, while my chest heaves and my heart beats wildly.

Why was he even there? Is he following me? I know it’s a small town, but after last night, I had thought for sure that he’d have left by now.

There was no sign of him this morning, even though a part of me wished to find him outside the shit hole I temporarily call home right now, but that’s beside the point. My feelings be damned. He is butting into my plans and starting to make this entire thing harder than it should be. I was dead fucking wrong in my assumption, and now, I am paying for it.

My mind replays the entire scene over and over in my head, and it frustrates me even more. The images flutter by, before focusing in on him as I pulled away. His lips pursed as he watched me peel out of the parking lot like a bat out of hell. He didn’t budge from his spot there in the dusty aftermath of my theatrics. Not him. Instead, the bastard smirked at me.

Smirked.

He fucking ruined a piece of my plan, and he fucking smirked, while doing it. It took everything I had in me not to throw this truck into reverse and run over his pretentious ass. To think, I was happy to feel his light touch on my cheek. Happy that he was protecting me from Big Joe’s unnecessary tirade, but in the end, that is what got me fired, and now I’m fucking pissed off.

I was already on Big Joe’s shit list after being over an hour late for the start of my shift. I tossed and turned all night, reliving my encounter with Ratchet outside of Willie’s. Even as I dozed, his face haunted my dreams. His eyes drawing me into him. His body joined with mine in a passionate embrace of intertwined limbs and screams of passion. His hands touching every inch of my body and making me feel alive again. Just the two of us without the pull of the world trying to tear us apart. Now that I am awake, it’s only worse.

I try to slow my breathing by exhaling and inhaling deeply, but my breathing exercise is cut short by my cell phone ringing in the seat next to me. Its chimes continue and abruptly end as soon as I pull off onto the shoulder. Far too many accidents have resulted in the use of a cell phone while driving, and California laws forbid its use, without a Bluetooth device. Old habits don’t fade easily, and because of my one rule following nature, I miss the call.

“Shit,” I mutter, while reaching over for my phone. I quickly unlock the screen, and pull up the missed call. Seeing the familiar number, I curse. I throw my head back against the headrest of the bench seat and release an exasperated sigh. It was the caseworker for my brother. With a flick of my finger, I hit the button to return her call.

The phone rings as I force my heavy breathing to quiet. The tone rings four times, before someone answers on the other side of the line.

“Kentucky Cabinet for Health and Family Services. How may I direct your call?” the operator says in a clipped tone.

“Nicole Wild, please,” I respond, trying to ease my nerves by tapping my fingers on the dashboard.

“One moment, please,” the woman responds, before the transfer goes through.

“This is Wild,” my caseworker gruffly declares.

“Hey, Nicole,” I stammer. “It’s Erica Delmont returning your call.”

“Ah, Ms. Delmont. I’m glad you called right back. Listen, I am about to step into a meeting, but I wanted to check-in about the status of your application.”

“About that,” I stall, knowing she is not going to like my excuse. For nearly a month, she’s been after me about finishing up the application to petition the courts. I stalled the best I could to get things and myself in a better standing, but as my caseworker, she is about as impatient as one can get. I understand that my brother being with my asshole father isn’t an ideal situation, but things needed to be in place so that the courts don’t have a reason to tell me no the first time around.

“Until we receive your two-hundred-dollar payment to initialize the filing with the courts for a relative adoption, I cannot proceed any further.”

“I understand that, Miss Wild. I had some unexpected changes to my employment, but I am working on getting the filing fee to you soon.”

I hear shuffling papers in the background, which annoys me instantly. I get that she is busy, but her insistence to keep working, while we are talking, strikes me as rude.

“I understand, but as I said, we cannot proceed without it. I do need to clarify one other thing with you. I have in my notes from our phone conversation that you listed that you are unmarried. Is that still the case?”

Why does that even matter?

“Yes. That’s right,” I curtly reply. “It’s been three weeks since I last spoke with you, Nicole. It’s not like good men grow on trees around here.”

Or anywhere for the matter. The kind of men around here are either way too old or way too poor. Neither of which would serve me any bit of good, when it comes to a paper marriage for the sake of Asher. There are only so many things I would do to get him back, but marrying someone is likely on the bottom of that to-do list.

“I see,” she coolly replies, while the noises from the paper shuffling intensify, only adding more to my annoyance with her.

“Is that a problem suddenly?”

“While it isn’t impossible to adopt as a single parent, the court typically likes placing children in a two-parent home. It provides better structure and a constant level of supervision, during the transitional and bonding phase of an adoption.”

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