Page 21 of All My Broken Dreams

He grinned and gazed at her again. “Nay, you’ll have to come with me to learn my secret. Then you’ll have something to hold over me. If you don’t feel up to it, you can stay here. Mrs. Cameron doesn’t have to know you spent the night. I’ll tell her you showed up looking for your brother. Which is the truth.”

Robbie gazed at him for a long moment. Looking full into his eyes, a thing she realized she hadn’t done for over a year. Looking into another person’s eyes was just about the most threatening thing there was. Deacon Wake had an open, unguarded gaze that contained no guile or cruelty or contempt. So unlike anything in her experience.

The room he lived in, that he had brought her to, felt safe and snug. He made it feel that way, she thought. He was a nice person. A kind person. If she fell apart out there, she could trust him to bring her home and not yell at her or make fun of her.

“If that’s the only way to find out what this big secret is,” Robbie said, “then I’ll go. It better be worth it. Like next level criminal stuff.”

He laughed and rolled over so that his broad back was facing her. “You’ll see. Good night, Robbie. I hope you don’t snore.”

She snorted with laughter and smiling into the dark, Robbie was asleep faster than she ever imagined possible.

Chapter Eleven

It was still dark when they arrived at Locksley Hall Academy. Robbie looked up, straight up, cranking her neck in a vain effort to see to the top of the center tower. Gothic black iron spires and carved gargoyles adorned the forbidding building. The building was constructed of sandstone that had been blackened by the soot of a hundred years ago.

“It was the coal fires that did that,” Deacon explained. “See all those chimneys? They all spewed smoke at one point and the stone blackened with it. Edinburgh’s nickname is ‘Auld Reekie.’The buildings have been cleaned over the years. It’s looking much better than it did.”

“It’s still pretty gloomy,” Robbie observed.

“That’ll be the weather. Nothing looks cheerful in November.”

She stared at the grand entrance to Locksley Hall. “Is this where my brother took his classes? Inside that building?”

“That one and a few others on campus. I can give you a tour if you like.”

Robbie shuddered and reached for his hand. “No. No. I’m doing good so far. I don’t want to jinx it.”

He looked down at her hand that was folded like an egg inside a baseball glove.

“I hope you don’t mind,” she said, following his gaze. “I did it on instinct. You calm me down. I feel better holding your hand. Is that okay?”

“Sure, it’s okay. If you don’t want the tour, are you ready to find out what I do here on campus in my off-hours? A thing so terrible, I would lose my job if the administration caught wind of it.”

She laughed. “You bet I am.”

He’d been making her laugh all morning. They both woke up at the same time, at six-thirty. While he made tea (No coffee, he told her. Foul stuff. Never drinks it.) Robbie raced to the bathroom to get in the shower and get dressed. Her suitcase had to be hidden out of the sight of Mrs. Cameron, which was harder than she thought since there were no closets to speak of in the flat. Finally, Deacon threw a blanket over it and stuck it behind the armchair.

They drank tea, made jokes about the suitcase, her snoring and his aversion to coffee, and then it was time to leave.

Robbie recalled the fear she had when they stepped outside of his rooms and he locked the door. Fear that he would abandon her. Fear that he would get bored, find a gang of people he would rather talk to and she’d be dumped.

Somehow, Deacon instinctively knew what she was thinking.

“How are you doing?” he had asked, searching her face.

“Don’t dump me, okay?”

“Okay, I won’t dump you.” His mouth twisted to a shy grin. “That’s the first time I’ve had to tell a girl that. It’s usually the other way around.”

The confession made her laugh and then as they were about to step into the street, she needed a minute to acclimate.He waited for her, not rushing her, not even talking to her which she appreciated. Some people thought they had to coach her through the anxiety when all she really needed was time.

Don’t rush me. Don’t make me feel like I’m holding you up and ruining your day.

He didn’t. He held out his hand and she took it wordlessly. They walked slowly through the morning cold with the sun just rising, but not high enough to clear the gothic rooflines of Scotland’s capital city.

Daylight revealed Edinburgh in all its majesty. Robbie was knocked breathless from the architectural beauty she found around every corner. The history in each side street, she learned from Deacon who told her all about it. His measured, halting storytelling settled her nerves until she forgot she was outside and just enjoyed everything she saw.

She couldn’t remember when they released each other’s hand but it felt very natural and safe to take his again when faced with Locksley Hall.

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