Page 45 of For the Love of the Broken Man

“Here, Dad. You know, we could have gone with Mickey and Jon if you weren’t so hardheaded. You’re thinkin’ about Jase, aren’t you?” Kayley sounded far wiser than her eight years. He knew she’d missed Jase after Dan had sent him away, but he’d forbidden her to contact him.

Danny was sure she’d heard about him from Meggie over the years when the families got together, but she seemed to know he didn’t want to hear what Jase was up to, so she’d kept quiet. Obviously, she’d heard the argument between him and Mickey over the phone the weekend before when Mickey asked him to go with them to the graduation. He’d thanked his friend for the invitation but declined just the same…in words that weren’t kind.

He refused to presume the hurt he’d imposed on Jason at the tender age of eighteen could ever be forgiven. There hadn’t been anyone else for Dan, but he supposed that wasn’t a surprise to anyone who really knew him. Phil and Javie tried to set him up on dates, but Danny had refused every one of them. He was determined to be fine on his own.

Dan looked at Kayley who had so much concern in her beautiful eyes…his sister’s eyes…and he hugged her. The adoption had gone through easily, and instead of doing as Jon and Mickey had urged… calling Jase to tell him… Danny had kept his mouth shut, closing the chapter of Jason Langston in his heart.

“You got any homework, Sweet Pea? I’ll be there on Wednesday for Field Day, and I’ll go to the store tomorrow and buy the oranges. I’ll get Sophia to cut ‘em up in slices, or whatever they’re supposed to be. You want pizza for a treat?” he asked the girl, thinking about the upcoming end-of-school activities.

There were two hard raps on the front door before it opened, revealing Tim Moran and Matt Collins. They were alone, and Dan wasn’t sure what his bosses were doing at his home that evening. He started to get up, but he felt the familiar dizziness that accompanied the welcomed numbness when his heart could get a break from aching, so he sat back down in the leather recliner.

Matt walked over to Kayley and smiled. “How’re you doing, powerhouse? You hungry?”

Danny noticed Matt whisked her away pretty quickly, leaving Tim to stare at him. Tim picked up the fresh beer Kayley had given him and took it out the back door to dump it in the yard. When he came back inside, he seemed to be upset, and Danny wasn’t sure why.

“Tim, whassss wrong?” Danny heard himself slurring a little.

“I could kick your ass, Dan. You—no.Wedidn’t lie to Jason so you could become a fucking drunk. This is an intervention. If Sophia wasn’t here taking care of Kayley, we’d have done it sooner, but we kept hoping and praying you’d come to your senses. Unfortunately, you didn’t, so we’re going to take matters into our own hands. You’re going to go along with us and not bitch about it for one minute.

“Yes, you’ve made certain Kayley was cared for, but really, Danny? Do you think it’s been healthy for her to see you drink yourself into oblivion damn near every night for three years because you broke your own heart?” Tim snarled at him, which wasn’t the norm.

Dan sure wasn’t prepared for the hostility. “What’s wrong? What did I do?”

“I’m takin’ Kayley back to the ranch with us, babe. Can you bring her some clothes when you come home?” Matt asked as he took Kayley out the front door. Danny didn’t have the strength to even object.

“Yeah. I’m gonna sober him up and bring him along in a little bit. Mickey call?” Tim asked.

Danny smiled a drunken smile. “Oh, Mick! How’s my old friend, Mick?”

Tim grabbed Danny’s arm and pulled him up, his strength a surprise. “Mickey’s the smartest of all of us, I’ll tell you that. Come on, jackass. Time to wash the stink off ya.” Tim half-carried Danny to the bathroom and shoved him into the shower, clothes and all.

When the cold water hit him at full blast, Danny laughed. It had been a hot day, and sipping Jack Daniel’s all afternoon to get through it only made the temperature hotter. It was a newer habit, drinking during the workday, that he wasn’t proud of, but it helped the time go faster.

Danny’s path to hell started with a few beers and tears in the evenings after he’d put Kayley to bed. He’d been stupid enough to reject Jason Langston. Dan continued to tell himself it was for the best to cut the relationship off cold turkey, and he’d stuck by that decision, even when he’d heard the words the heartbroken young man had offered.

“Sure, Danny. I understand about it. Um, can we…I mean, can I call you? Can we keep emailing? I won’t bother you too much, but I love you, Danny.”

Those words were loud in his aching head every morning. The more Danny drank during the day, the quieter they became until they were completely silent in the evening. It was a relief when Dan stopped hearing the pain in Jase’s voice.

Of course, Kayley would make him something to eat as he sat in the chair. She even learned to do the laundry from Sophia, the woman he’d hired to take care of her. Sophia and Danny didn’t like each other much, but they both cared about Kayley.

Dan started taking off his clothes in the shower because he knew he stank from the hot day and the work he’d done, likely more from the pint of whiskey he’d drank that afternoon as he was out fixing fence at the ranch by himself, rejecting any help offered by the other hands.

He vaguely remembered running into the machine shed when he drove back up to park the Gator, but it was a tough vehicle. It could take the jolt. And just like that, Danny’s memories took one as well.

“What’s all this?” Dan asked. Jase was standing in the hallway with Kayley behind him toting a bag from Target.

She pushed her blonde hair out of her face and smiled a glowing smile at him. “Jase and me are gonna make my room as pretty as Meggie’s. You can help us if you wanna.”

“Pink and spring green.” Danny chuckled at the memory as he continued to shower. Jase had taken her shopping after he got paid, and he and Danny had spent the weekend fixing up her room. She still loved it.

“It’s for you, Dan,” Jase told him as he handed him a wrapped box with a bow. Danny wasn’t one who accepted gifts easily because it wasn’t his style.

He opened it, seeing a thin chain with small letters hanging from it. A J and a D. “I’m not one for jewelry, Jase.” Danny’s words were cold as he put it back in the box and returned it to the younger man.

“Oh! Shit. I’m sorry.” Jase took the box and put it in his pocket.

Dan had seen Jase wear the necklace once when he and Kayley had visited Wonderland, and he felt guilty for being such a prick about it, but he didn’t say anything. He was embarrassed for his stupidity at rejecting a gift the younger man had obviously offered with love.

---