Page 57 of When Day Breaks

It's a simple request, and I think we've established that I am not a creature of simplicity.

"Lucynda, I rather think we should focus on more-"

"Don't." She drops my hands and takes a step backward. "Don't you dare say that me wanting to dance with my husband istrivial.Unfounded. Whatever it is you were about to say." She turns around and takes a few steps away before turning back around to face me again.

She continues, "I know the kingdom has other problems to face and focus on. But you brought me out here, and I'm really glad you did, but…" her expression becomes crestfallen, her eyes lose their sparkle and her hope disintegrates. But then she steps back up to me and grabs my hands once more. "I don't want to lose this moment. Not yet. Besides, all of those other problems we have to face won't be solved in the next ten minutes. I might not last past this curse, Rivian. So please . . . give me ten minutes."

I've already disappointed her so much in the short time she's known me. And while I realize that, I still don't find the appeal in wanting to dance out in the middle of a snowy forest as the night shades the sky. But maybe that's just it. Maybe it's not about me and what I see to be of relevance. I've lived so long under the trance of my own selfishness that letting someone else take from me isn't something I'm used to. But I suppose she's not really taking from me more than she wants me to open my fucking eyes to see that she is giving to me. Giving me time, giving me distance from the noise, and moment tojust be.

Just when I think I’ve broken free of the darkness and found my way to some semblance of light, something pulls me back in just a sliver causing me to stumble against everything I’m working toward. I know what I want now, I just have to let someone else help navigate for a bit instead continuously trying to maintain sole control.

She’s not taking anything from me, only what she deserves to receive from me. In hindsight, I did rob her of all the little things in life, like dancing in the snow or-

"You didn't rob me," she says with a little more sass to her tone.

I lift my head to face her, a force blazing between us as she locks eye contact on me. A look of shock likely painted on my face when I realize what she’d just done.

I hadn't said that out loud.

"You just read my mind," I claim and her own face contorts with the recognition of such.

"Wait, I did?" She looks up at me and I nod my head.

"Without my permission and without me allowing access to you first." Pride swells in me along with a mix of many other emotions I never really experience often, and the warmth of it comforts me.

I wrap my arms around her back to lift her up into me while she clasps her hands around my neck and our noses nearly touch, soft smiles on both of our faces.

"I should have never allowed you to ask me more than once. Anything you want, anything at all, I will always give you." She smiles against my words before I take her lips with mine.

I drop her back down to her feet but we both maintain the holds we have on each other; my hands around the small of her back and hers around my neck. I start to lead the steps back and forth, side to side as she follows my lead and we both sway against the snowflakes and the light wind as our only form of music.

The idea and the potential that we may have forever together braves more foreign feelings within me as I hold my wife, watching her take joy from this very moment alone.

It’s silent. Pure, undeniably peaceful silence.

Lucynda and I keep swaying back and forth, her head buried against my chest as my chin rests on her head, savoring the warmth that radiates between us and the unspoken words that fill our chests.

Who knew I would find a fragment of serenity from dancing; like a small puzzle piece floating about in the snow and connecting to the two of us in this moment, putting us together to paint a picture we can call our own.

"Rivian,” Lucynda whispers. “When I met you in the library that first time, I felt the pull you refer to.” My heart seizes for a beat at her words. "I mean, I didn't know exactly what it was at the time, but I felt this draw to you."

I'm sure she can hear, if not feel, my heart pounding in my chest as she keeps her head there. I don't know what it is about her confessing feelings and emotions to me, but it causes me to become . . . nervous yet filled with so much euphoria.

"I thought you were just some strange man with a charming smile and you were ominous and maybe even seductive but whatever it was, I couldn't look away. I didn't want to."

She lifts her head up to look at me, and something more unexplainable than nerves grates on me in a pleasant way as her eyes find mine.

"Then, the masquerade party. I saw you again in the throne room. Though I didn't know it was you at first and even while you were with another woman, I felt . . . gratified by watching you. It was enthralling and I didn't know how to explain how wrong it felt just by looking you in the eyes knowing that I wanted to be her." Cyn's hands rub smoothly over the nape of neck as I continue to hold her, listening to her soft voice as she recounts our introduction to each other.

She holds her eyes on mine, and that’s when I see the shift. The grays that blend with the snow falling from the dark sky now swirl in a hypnotizing shade of lavender even as the curseis silenced for the time being, and I cave to the visual as her lust consumes her.

My thoughts evade me as Lucynda stands on her toes to kiss my neck. The heat between us creates an ache for more as she calculatingly lets her teeth scrape gently against my skin.

"Lucynda," I warn her, trying my best to not let my own bloodlust take over. But I can't help it when my finger digs deeper into her skin, desperate to get past the layers of clothing between us.

"I wanted to be scared by you," she continues as she leans back down and lays her head against my chest again. "But I guess you can say that I was trying to hide the thoughts that . . .my life was meant for great adventure," she repeats the words I told her my mother once told me, a jolt of exuberance and passion fleeting her tone. "I wanted to explore that with you. And maybe I was forcing my need for love onto you, partially because I was going to be married and I wouldn't have felt like I did my heart justice if I didn't try but…" She brings her eyes back up to me once more and I fight not to lose myself in them as I try to remain focused on her words. "I guess I really did feel that bind to you."

"What do I need to do for you to forgive me?" I say to her, wondering if there's anything else she can require of me other than the obvious trust we continue to build and the promise of everything she desires.

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