Page 64 of When Day Breaks

He didn't speak a word. Not before. Not during. Not after. So, this is the first time I'm hearing his voice since the fight in the hallway and I'm surprised he's even talking to me now.

I pour the drinks and slide him his glass. He takes it eagerly before speaking, "I've been thinking…" He analyzes the golden liquid through the glass, then slams the four fingers I poured before placing the glass back down. "Why not just hand the reins over to Travois?" Kacian's question fills the space between us like a smoke grenade. Thick and out of nowhere.

I wasn't feeling an ounce of anything remotely close to anger when I woke this morning. I rose well before the sun, a clear and level-headed mind that I used to work hard in order to ensure this Society meeting can go as smoothly as possible, but I can't help but twitch at his random and absurd suggestion.

I lower my own glass, letting the scotch barely touch my lips for a second before I do, and wait with bated breath for him to explain his reasoning.

"He wants this. You don't, or at least you didn't. You'd be free of the obligation and you and Lucynda could live a somewhat restriction free life." He doesn't wait for me to respond or to argue. He simply spins the glass on the table as if it were a small dainty table-top spinner and then turns to leave.

What the hell was that?

I hold my own glass in my hands, taunting myself with the layer of confusion and irritation that berates me at Kacian's words.

I finally decide to swallow down my drink, but it doesn't do anything to get rid of the lump forming in my throat. So I reachfor the whole bottle and tip the neck of it back to my lips, gulping a generous amount to eliminate the intrusion.

What the fuck does he mean,hand over the reins? Did he not hear everything I went through just to bethis. Forget the fact that I needed this position to ultimately seek the endgame I'd been planning for, but everything else I suffered because of what was expected of me.

I can't just hand it over . . . can I? And to Travois of all people. The man is a loose cannon, carved by the agony of the storm that conceals his own bewildering desires. Undeclared of what he wants as he slowly self-destructs. He may think he has everything and everyone figured out but the man is lost at sea.

The thought buzzes in my brain for a few beats though. Could Lucynda and I be happier not having to worry about ruling a kingdom together? Life as Royalty was never meant to be this difficult to prove. Granted, I started my run by creating a mess for her to feel obligated to help clean up. We now have threats to eliminate and if all that subsided, would Royalty still be ideal for us? Maybe Kacian’s suggestion was to help me, a suggestion for a life far better than the one he’s watched me live through.

But if that’s all he has to say to me in the midst of everything else, then I refuse to take his words for more than what they are . . . asinine.

Zharus finally knocks at the door just as I expect him to.Good, I could use a distraction by trading one mess for another.

"You summoned?" he asks, his eyes seeming sure and his demeanor fairly normal in comparison to the past few days. But I know he's hiding something, and I promise he's not leaving this room until I find out what it is.

"Come in," I wave at him as I pour my final drink. "Lock the doors behind you," I say, and he does as told. But he doesn't do it without the sliver of worry that layers his face, probably unawarethat I catch it before he has time to wipe it off and feign an expression of calmness.

"If this is about the meeting. I can assure you everything seems to be in order. A few of the other guards were bombard with questions that they ignored but otherwise, all seems to be calm for now and-"

I hold my palm out, urging his silence. "That's not what I asked you here for, Zharus." I sip the amber liquid from the glass tumbler as I keep my eyes concentrated on him.

He suddenly seems nervous, like he can't stand the fact that he has no idea what I could possibly need him for, but I think after all the family secrets we’ve shared and how close his own secrets have teetered the edge of reveal, he should have a pretty good idea of what I'll be asking of him today.

The sun rises over the trees, the late afternoon settling in as its rays burst against the layers of snow, now melting into the ground.

"Sir?" he questions.

I set the glass down on my desktop and take a few steps in front of it before leaning against the edge.

"I have given you plenty of space and way more leniency than I like because…" I trail off for a brief second knowing that the real answer is not of knowledge to Zharus as I've tried my best to keep him hidden from the truth. But the truth is that I simply didn't care enough to pursue whatever secrets he hid because I was too focused on my own. That, and I thought I could trust him.

That all changes today.

"You are a person of trust in this castle. I have allowed you too much of your own privacy and I called you here, demanding answers." I decide to skip the pleasantries and be stern in my request. He's not free until he gives me what I need.

"Sir. Rivian, I-" He stumbles backwards, trying to escape my demand and ends up seated in a chair.

I stalk forward, letting him know that I will be heard and he will obey my orders to tell me the truth.

"That's not a suggestion, Zharus. That is a command." I let my voice raise a little too loud, but I don't care who hears this conversation. Let everyone know that I will not be so lax any longer.

"I'm ashamed," Zharus breathes, and his admission has me quite confound but curious as to what he means.

"Elaborate," I request and he takes a deep breath.

I watch as he battles with the fact that after this, things might change between us. I can’t expect that whoever he might name, should be this detrimental to his reserve unless he’s going to say the one name I don’t want him to say.

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