Page 17 of When Day Breaks

“Darkness is what drives you and weakness is what can cause your downfall.” I don’t mean for the words to come out. I only intended tothinkthem, but as it is he likely would have pulled them from head anyway.

He smiles at me, knowing that I am catching on to the fatuous meaning of his words. But no matter how ridiculous . . . he’s not wrong.

He stuffs a hand in his pocket, the gloved one now holding onto his mask, before he continues.

"You never wanted to hide whatever darkness engineered you because you know that hiding only means you're ashamed. And you are not ashamed, are you, little sister? You enjoy knowing you are contrived by the evil that haunts you. Yet you've made yourself believe that you've dissimulated the thoughts that made you less than worthy, because you didn't want anyone to know what drives your emotions, what manufactured such a broken girl who only desired tofeel love. But that's where your weakness comes into play, right? And though you're no stupid girl, well aware that love is going to be your downfall because your darkness prevented you from everfeelinglove, you still made up this rather riveting idea that weakness is strength, but that's what's gotten you into this mess, isn't it Lucy?"Asshole. How dare he choose the one time I'm confined and unable to bash his fucking head in, to sit here and analyze me, berate me and pick me a part.

"You don't fucking know me," I spit at him, knowing damn well that just very well laid me out to dry.

But to Hell with fear. I no longer care about falling victim to those who show their true colors and set out to make mylife miserable. I no longer care to walk on glass around those who claim to have more power than me. I couldn't figure out whether to hide or be free around Rivian and it led me to mental destruction. I refuse to let anyone, dead or living, have that much power over me ever again.

Though, it does slightly entice me that Travois just did the work that multiple paid professionals couldn't even unravel in the matter of minutes, and I haven't said more than a few sentences to him. I like him for it. It makes him interesting.

"In fact, I do know you, sister," he continues. "You flourish in that weight you carry. The burden that was forced onto you, the one that says you're not enough. You've been molded by your past and it serves as a reminder that no one will ever make you feel so small. It works for you to an extent, because you know it's made you stronger and it's given you a sense of power. But if you let it show too much, then you risk becoming the villain. That's where you and I are the same. You see, somewhere along the way everything got lost, didn't it? At one point, you were plagued with thoughts of one or the other, light and dark, now confused in your conviction because of someone else's doing.” He pauses as he looks me up and down, like he’s trying to read me. “Because the one thing you valued the most, the thing that made you strong in your heart, was twisted by someone who told you that it in fact was the only weakness you carry and in turn, forced you to show your hand. Forcing you to play your darkness and suppress the only thing you ever desired the most."

I scoff. Is he supposed to impress me with his ability to dismantle an entire theory behind why someone is the way they are? Because right now, it's only making anger boil in my veins the more he goes on, a hunger caressing my bones. Yet, he decides to continue.

"Rivian made you believe that your desire for love was trivial, didn't he? He made you believe that your strength wasweak and he wanted you to fully showcase whatever darkness you harbored because he wanted you, hisanima vinculum, to live in the same desperations he subjected himself to. Yet to his defense, I think he thought he was doing you a favor," he chuckles lightly. "I think my poor brother wanted to help you in that sense because he's the kind of person who hides his darkness and pretends as if it doesn't exist becausehe isashamed. So, he urged you to feel the same and he thought he could use that to his advantage. Because he's terrified of his darkness, the very thing that drives you in strength."

He’s insinuating that Rivian's darkness is my strength and that my darkness is his strength. That's a lot to wrap my head around, especially when all I can think about is ripping into someone's neck, but I guess it could make sense. But why come down here and divulge all of his knowledge to me?

He bends back down and lifts one of the chains latched to my ankle and drops it, taunting me. It infuriates me. Because on top of spewing a shit ton of motivational conspiracy tales of darkness and weakness, I can't stand that he's right. I can't stand that he's in front of me, using his vapid but smart brain to make me hate him. And right now, my hunger is raging.

"I hope you know you sound dumb. You probably don't even know half of what you just said," I quip, wanting to get under his skin as much as he’s gotten under mine.

"I see you've captured some of Troy's traits as well." He smirks at me.

"What's your weakness then, tough guy?" I readjust the chains to lessen the pain starting to dig into my bones at my wrists.

"Oh no, I'm not giving up the goods that easily. But let's just say that we're far more alike than I care to admit. It's a shame we didn't get to grow up with each other." Travois gleams a smug smile at me, it reminds me a little of Rivian which stirs up all kinds of thoughts in my head.

Needing him.

Hating him.

Fighting every battle in my head against him.

I need to get the fuck out of here.

Travois tilts his head at me and I keep my eyes locked on him, curious as to what he's thinking or what he’s going to say.

"I never expected you to go full blown psycho. That's quite a mess you made back at the Gilded Hollow." His chuckle taunts me, creates unwanted chills to travel down my arms and grips me like evil itself. Whatever haunts Travois, it's not the same as my darkness. His darkness is scary. “You should learn to control yourself next time.”

"Haven’t you been locked up this whole time?" I wonder, just now realizing that he’d gotten out somehow.

He rubs his jaw with his ungloved hand. I want to ask him about it, but almost as if he's reading my mind, or maybe simply just responding to my question, he says, "We're allowed secrets, wouldn't you say?”

I roll my eyes. This man is infuriating. He just revealed all of my mental truths against my will, exposing me without my permission and practically unveiling my entire being but yet, he wants to hold onto his petty secrets while still digging for more of mine.

Silence falls between us for a few beats, allowing me to relax from all the shit he just piled on me, but it’s not long before he's moving on to his next inconceivable ramble.

"It's fun letting yourself go, isn't it?" he asks, running a finger over his jaw before turning his back to me.

"What are you on about now?" I shuffle my legs, trying to get myself into a more comfortable position against this cold wall.

"If it's secrets of mine you want, let me fill you in on another." He pauses a beat before inhaling a deep breath and continuing. "The first attacks of Outsiders in Valor Cove, that was me." Hetilts his head, examining his words and I almost don’t believe him. "However, I didn't kill the other two and I sure as hell didn't kill the Nocturnes. But fuck, baby sister, doesn't it feel good to step outside of the rules? To evade the constraints and push back? And don't you dare tell me you didn't enjoy it. Again, you and I are one in the same and we're only able to hide our darknesses for so long. We crave those needs we've been drowning in." His eyes are like little rocks of lava burning holes in my head.

If I were human, his admission might scare me. But I don't even flinch at his confession; he killed two Outsiders. For fun? I just killed over twenty. Who knows why he's telling me this and I honestly could care less. But I would be lying if I said it didn't intrigue me just a little bit, his confidence to confide in me. But I also think about what this means for the Rogue that Rivian told me about.

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