Page 78 of The Do-Over

‘Do you want to see me?’

‘Of course I do! But I’m scared, because I can’t do what you did. I can’t just have the bits of you that are left over. I want all of you, and I know I can’t have it.’

‘Says who?’ he asks, smiling at last. ‘Let me ask you this. Are you serious? Do you really want this?’

‘I do.’

His smile broadens into a beam that lights up the whole room. ‘Martin Osborne is really going to hate you.’

‘Why?’

‘Because I’m going to have to tell him on Monday that Morton Lansdowne is losing another partner.’

33

EIGHTEEN MONTHS LATER

‘Does anyone know the phrase “rule of thumb”?’ I ask, looking out at the sea of eager young faces in front of me. I get a few blank looks, but most of them nod.

‘Does anyone know where it comes from?’

Nobody raises their hand. I wasn’t expecting them to, but one thing I’ve learned since starting this is always to be prepared for anything when you’re working with children.

‘It’s actually a milling term,’ I tell them, moving over to the chute the ground flour is gently sliding down before falling into the sack below. ‘The only way a miller could tell if he or she was milling the flour correctly was to take some and rub it between their thumb and forefinger, like this. That’s the rule of thumb. Who wants to try?’

Several hands shoot up, and I give them each a little bit of flour to rub. It always makes a mess, but what’s the fun in visiting a mill if you don’t end up covered in flour?

‘So, before we finish, has anyone got any questions? No? OK, I’ve got one to ask you then. Who can remember the names of the three main controls in a mill, and what they do?’

A little girl at the front sticks her hand up so hard I’m concerned she’s going to do herself a mischief. ‘Yes?’ I ask her.

‘The slooz gate,’ she says.

‘That’s right. The sluice gate is one of the controls. What does it do?’

‘It makes the wheel go faster and slower.’

‘Exactly. It controls the speed of the mill. Who would like to tell me another one?’

The little girl’s hand shoots up again, but I pick a boy near the back this time.

‘Go on,’ I encourage him.

‘The tent screw.’

‘Tentering screw, close. What does it do?’

‘Controls the stones.’

‘That’s right. It controls the distance between the stones, so we can adjust how finely they mill the grains. Can anyone remember the last one?’

No hands go up, not even the little girl.

‘The crook string,’ I remind them. ‘Anyone remember what it does?’

‘Controls the flow of wheat?’ a boy in the middle of the group offers.

‘Well done,’ I tell him warmly.

---