Page 74 of The Do-Over

An uncomfortable silence descends again.

‘Look,’ Alasdair says eventually. ‘I get that this is a shock for you, but I’m not a problem you need to solve. I’m a big boy; I can look after myself.’

‘What happens if friends is all I can offer?’

‘Then friends is what I’ll take. My offer stands. You’re obviously not going to marry George, based on this morning’s events, but if you find someone else, I still want to be your page boy. Promise me that?’

I smile. ‘I promise you that.’

32

‘Did you straighten things out with George?’ Rebecca asks as I walk into the sitting room that afternoon. Alasdair has gone back to London to get ready for his trip, and the events of the morning, plus a lack of sleep, have combined to make me feel dazed and sluggish. I have no idea how to begin to unpack what I’ve learned today. George is easy, but what the hell am I going to do about Alasdair?

‘Yes,’ I tell her wearily.

‘You don’t sound very pleased,’ Saffy observes. ‘I know you don’t have a lot of experience in this area, but it’s normal for people in the early stages of a relationship to be a bit more enthusiastic.’

‘I’m not in the early stages of a relationship. George and I aren’t together.’

‘Oh.’

‘Look, it turns out you were both right. He wouldn’t have been enough for me and, frankly, I’m not sure what I saw in him. Happy now?’

‘I don’t think it’s about making us happy,’ Rebecca says carefully. ‘Is it what you want?’

I plonk myself dejectedly down in one of the armchairs. ‘Yes.’

‘So what opened your eyes?’ Saffy asks.

‘I think I just realised that we weren’t compatible,’ I say after thinking for a moment. ‘He may be easy on the eye, but the watermill is literally the only thing we have in common, and that’s not really enough to build a relationship on.’ I close my eyes, pleased with my answer. If I can keep them off the scent of Alasdair and his revelations, I might just escape a full-on interrogation.

‘And what about Alasdair?’ Saffy asks.

Shit. So much for that then. ‘What about him?’ I ask as nonchalantly as I can.

‘Where does he fit into all of this?’

‘He doesn’t. He’s gone back to London.’

‘Shame,’ Rebecca says. ‘I liked him.’

‘You certainly kept him well hidden,’ Saffy observes.

‘He’s just a friend,’ I explain, trying to adopt the fierce tone I know will shut down further debate, but somehow unable to muster it.

‘Can I make an observation?’ Saffy asks me after a long silence.

‘Can I stop you?’

‘Probably not. Here’s the thing. You are my sister, and I love you more than you’ll ever know. You’re also one of the brightest people I’ve ever met. But, when it comes to your love life, you are a total, unmitigated fucking disaster. Even Rebecca is more switched on than you. She may have been shagging a married man who turned out to be a monster, but at least she found Ben.’

‘Hey, leave me out of this,’ Rebecca interjects. ‘Even if I do agree with you, Saffy.’

‘I mean it,’ Saffy continues, evidently warming to her theme. ‘For someone supposedly so intelligent, you are literally as thick as pigshit where love is concerned.’

‘Don’t hold back, will you?’ I tell her. ‘Go on, tell me what you really think.’

‘Oh, I will. Don’t you worry about that. Let’s start with the easy question, shall we? What, in the name of all that’s holy, were you doing mooning around after a cardboard cutout like George, when you had Alasdair in the wings all along?’

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