Page 45 of Too Busy for Love

‘Who’s going to buy it? It’s obviously not viable as a hotel, otherwise the chain wouldn’t have closed it, and you can’t convert it into anything else because the council won’t let you. It’s a white elephant, as Dad will take delight in pointing out when he calls to give me a large helping of “I told you so” with a generous dash of “this is why we do it my way” on the side.’

‘He sounds a bit of a tyrant, if you don’t mind me saying,’ James tells her. ‘He should be proud that you’re looking for new opportunities.’

‘He really isn’t a tyrant. He’s actually very supportive of me, generally. Even though he didn’t like this idea, he let me run with it. That’s the kind of person he is. Having said that, I went against his advice and it hasn’t paid off. The schadenfreude will be too great for him to resist.’

As if on cue, her phone rings again and she groans. ‘Here we go. Hi, Dad. Yes, Ella just phoned me…’

She gets up from the sun lounger and wanders away, evidently wanting to be out of earshot for the conversation with her father. James watches her go with a strange expression on his face.

‘Are you OK there?’ I ask.

‘Oh. Yes, umm, sorry. I was miles away for a moment.’

‘Dare I ask if it has anything to do with Abby?’

‘Mm. Have you heard the phrase “Hate to see you go, love to watch you leave”?’

‘No. What does it – oh!’ I tell him as the penny drops.

‘Doesn’t she have a magnificent rump?’ he says wistfully, gazing down to Abby, who is striding back and forth in her bikini at the far end of the pool, evidently having quite a forceful conversation, if her facial expression and hand gestures are anything to go by.

‘She’s not a cow, James! If I may offer you some advice, talking about women like they’re slabs of meat is unlikely to get you the result you want.’

‘How would you describe it then? “Nice arse” just sounds common.’

‘Why don’t you focus on her as a whole, rather than picking on a single bodily feature?’

‘I’m not sure I follow. Surely I’m allowed to admire her physique?’

‘Of course you are, but it has to be in the context of her as a person. If you make remarks about it in isolation, that’s not attractive.’

‘Are you telling me that women don’t like men to find them beautiful?’

‘Of course we do! But we want to be found beautiful as people, not just as a set of physical attributes. Does that make sense?’

‘But I don’t know that much about her as a person yet. I can only judge what I see.’

‘Then learn. Let’s translate this into your world. What was that wine you were talking about on the way from the airport?’

‘Château Petrus.’

‘That’s the one. So, imagine you’ve bought a bottle of that and you’ve invited me round to taste it with you.’

‘Not very realistic. I may get it for customers but it’s way out of my price range.’

‘You’ve won the lottery.’

‘Oh, OK.’

‘So, you’re all excited about sharing this incredible wine, right?’

He smiles. ‘If it’s Château Petrus, I’m not sure I’m sharing it.’

‘You’re sharing it,’ I tell him firmly. ‘You pour two glasses, and you do the whole swirling and sniffing thing before taking a taste and telling me all the things I should be able to pick up. Then I take a mouthful, swallow it straight down and tell you, “It’s all right, I suppose, but I prefer rosé”. How do you feel?’

‘I’d take it off you and probably never speak to you again.’

‘But that’s exactly what you’re doing to Abby, don’t you see? She’s every bit as complex as your Château Petrus, but all you’re talking about is the shape of the bottle. How would you describe her if she was a wine?’

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