Page 54 of The Fallen Ones

“Lil, come on,” Caleb coaxed. “Talk to me.”

“I-I want more,” I finally whispered.

His hand stiffened over mine, his body tensing.

“More of what?”

“Of that night.” I looked to him to see so much turmoil on his face it gutted me. I was hurting him. I pushed those thoughts about why away. What if I were wrong about them too?

Everything had changed and it sucked.

“Was it good?” he finally whispered.

I nodded, my eyes locked on his. “So good. I just…I want to do it again. There were three guys, Caleb. I’m not that girl, but I let three of them do it. It felt so good, but it was so wrong. What’s wrong with me? That I liked it? That I want more?” I grasped his hands, hoping he’d give me an answer.

“What is more?” he asked gently. He reached out and tilted my chin up when I made to look down.

A few tears squeezed their way from my eyes as I stared back at him.

“I-I don’t know. Just…more. I don’t even know who they were.Are.I know nothing about them. I feel so stupid catching feelings like this. Tell me I’m crazy.”

“You’re not crazy,” he murmured. “You’re just…you, Lily. Just Lily.”

“What do I do?”

He stared back at me for a moment before pulling me into his arms. “I don’t know. I guess that’s something you need to figure out.”

I clung to him, knowing he was right.

It was something I’d have to figure out or get over.

Falling for three masked men at a Halloween party was crazy. It was stupid.

But I didn’t know what else these feelings were. So, for now, I’d let them tumble around in my head and heart while I tried to sort through it all.

I owed myself that much.

Chapter 21

Caleb

As I lay in bed I thought about my visit to Lily earlier in the day. I couldn’t stop thinking about her. I felt like the biggest asshole. I’d sat and listened to her worries, wiped tears from her eyes, and played out my role as her best friend all while knowing I was part of the reason for her sadness.

The secret that I’d been one of the masked guys killed me. Even more so hearing her say she wanted to do it again.

I didn’t know if I could keep lying to her.

I didn’t know if I should tell Jace and Damien.

I didn’t know what the fuck I was supposed to do.

But one thing I did know was that I enjoyed being with Lily more than anything in the world. Being intimate with her was something I’d always wanted. Knowing it was possible to have her again and again as one of the masked men was like a knife twisting in my gut.

I grabbed my phone from my bedside table and scrolled to my gallery. The photo Lily sent to me in her Halloween red devil dress had me mesmerized all over again.

I wanted her.

But I knew I couldn’t have her alone. The only way I’d get to be her masked man again was if there were three of us. We’dmade that stupid pact. Now if any of us tried to keep Lily for ourselves the others would spill and we’d all lose her.

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