Page 80 of The Fallen Ones

“How sweet,” I muttered.

“If you’re beating yourself up over last night, don’t,” Damien called out. “She liked it. She came so hard she soaked you, man. You already knew she wanted to be forced. You gave her what she wanted. For the first time in my life I can honestly say I’m jealous of you, Watts.”

I glanced at him, still feeling unwell over everything.

“I lost it. I shouldn’t have been so rough with her. I’m not that guy.” I looked from Damien to Jace, hoping they believed me.

“You’re beating yourself up,” Jace said. “Relax.”

I ground my teeth together, hating myself a little more.

“I just felt like I needed to prove that I wasn’t gross. That we could have something,” I muttered, feeling like I needed to explain it to them in case they didn’t believe I wasn’t a monster. “She said that shit to me and it got to me. Then seeing her with Brandon and it just fucking snowballed.”

“I get that.” Damien threw his empty beer can in the trash. “I’d have done the same thing, honestly.” He winked at me like he had a secret he was keeping. I ignored him.

“She messaged me.” I pulled my phone out and stared down at her message asking me to talk.

“And?” Jace raised his brows at me and sat forward in his seat.

“I don’t know. I guess I’m scared to hear what she has to say.”

“What could she say?” Damien stretched his legs out and gave me a pointed look. “She’s not going to say shit, Caleb. Stop being a pussy and go talk to her. If not for you, for us. We’re still in this shit even though neither of us got laid last night. Which, again, I’m proud of you.”

“Thanks,” I mumbled at him.

“Find out what she wants to talk to you about. We can meet tomorrow night after classes and talk about it. I have football and need to study for some bullshit test Owens is handing out.”

“Pay some freshman to do that shit.” Damien shook his head at Jace. “Fuck wasting time doing bullshit.”

“Some of us like to make an honest go of it,” Jace shot back.

Damien snickered and looked around the room. “You’ll have to point me in the direction of all the honest people because I don’t see any of those pricks here.”

Jace let out a breath and shook his head.

“What do I do if she tells me she doesn’t want to be friends anymore?” I asked the question that was eating at me. It was one of the reasons I kept putting off replying to her message or going to her.

“Then you show her why that’s a really bad fucking idea,” Damien said. “God, Watts. I hope you’re seriously not this pussified. We saw the way you fucked her last night. You’ve got game. Use that shit.”

I shot him a sour look.

“Listen, Damien is a prick, but he’s right. If she says she doesn’t want to be friends anymore, then just talk to her. I doubt she’s going to say anything like that. Tear the band-aid off and just find out. The longer you sit here worrying about it, the more shit your head will invent. Just do it. We’ll talk tomorrow.” Jace got to his feet and nodded to Damien to follow.

Damien grumbled but got to his feet.

“We need to get you a new place, Watts. And furniture. This shit sucks. And why does it smell like grandma pussy in here?”

“Fuck off,” I said.

He chuckled. “Seriously, what are you majoring in?”

“Business.”

“Really? Figured you’d be pre-med or some shit. What are you going to do with a business degree?”

“Buy a bar and turn it into something fucking amazing,” I said, voicing aloud for the first time my plans. I’d been bartending for awhile now. I had so many ideas to make a place great, but I was at a hole-in-the-wall place and my boss didn’t give a shit if things ever improved. He was old and over it. Buying the place from him was a goal of mine. We’d talked about it at length before, and he’d told me as soon as I was ready to just let him know because he wanted out. The location was good. That side of the city was seedy, but it was improving and I could see things really taking off with the right businesses.

“Interesting,” Damien said, nodding his head.

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