Page 106 of Sinful

I finally looked away, knowing I wasn’t the guy who could have that.

“The self-loathing is a bit early,” Mirage called out.

I snapped my attention back to him to see Sirena had separated from him and had gone to stand at the window. She was staring out into the falling snow, her lips parted.

“Fuck off,” I muttered.

I glanced to Sirena again to see she wasn’t paying us any attention.

“And put a fucking shirt on,” I snarled at Mirage.

He chuckled. “Why don’t you take yours off?”

I looked up at him standing by his bed and scoffed. “Why?”

“Because you’re worried she likes the way I look more than she likes you,” he said softly, so I knew she couldn’t hear him.

I ground my teeth at his words. “Untrue, fuckhead.”

He laughed again. Then, he grabbed a clean hoodie from his drawer and pulled it over his head before flopping back onto his bed and watching Sirena stare out the window.

The room suddenly felt too small.

“Siren?” I called out, grabbing our notebook and jacket. “We should probably get back. I don’t want the guys to get home and you’re gone.”

She looked over her shoulder at me before moving away from the window. I grabbed her jacket and helped her into it when she reached me. She allowed me to help and even let me pull her pink hat over her head.

“Your mittens,” I said, clearing my throat and holding them out for her to put on. She did so without a word, silent as always.

I caught Mirage’s eye, and he winked at me before going back to the book he’d picked up. He read a lot. He was currently reading a lot of books on physics and the metaphysical world, but I’d seen him a week ago going through sci-fi novels. He was all over the place. I could have sworn I even saw him reading a math textbook one day.

“I’ll, uh, be back in a bit when the guys get back,” I said.

Mirage tossed his book aside and got up.

Sirena turned to face him again, and he dropped a kiss on the top of her head and then gave her another hug.

“Soon,” he said gently, almost a whisper to her. “Believe me?”

She nodded, and he sighed and released her before backing away, a sad look on his face. I gave him a nod, and he went back to the bed and his book as we left the room.

It was a quiet walk, but I didn’t expect anything else. With my hands stuffed into my jacket pockets, we trudged through the accumulating snow. When we reached the house, I opened the door for her, and she went inside and took off her jacket and gear.

Needing a moment to myself, I stayed outside and grabbed a shovel. I cleared off the patio and the walkway before going back inside to find her sitting on the couch with our notebook on her lap and writing.

A sad smile touched my lips, and I removed my jacket and boots and went to sit beside her.

She slid the notebook onto my lap and got up. I took it and read what she’d written.

I’m sorry if I made you feel uncomfortable tonight with Mirage. I didn’t mean to. I had so much fun with you. I don’t want the night to end or end weirdly, so I was thinking we could talk more? I like doing this with you. I almost feel normal when we do it. I also feel awkward because I don’t want you to feel like you’re being forced into this. If you don’t want to talk, we could just watch a movie, or I can go upstairs and give you some space.

She came back to the couch holding two mugs of hot chocolate, complete with marshmallows, and offered me a nervous smile.

“Sit,” I murmured, taking the mug from her that was intended for me.

A look of relief swept over her face, and she took the spot next to me, her mug in hand. We sipped our drinks, and I nodded.

It was some good shit.

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