Page 29 of Stitches

But fuck it.

I liked this small bit of relief.

Sitting up, I looked around. It was definitely night, and I must’ve really passed the fuck out. For how long, I didn’t know.

When my phone buzzed in my pocket, I pulled it out and stared down at Ashes’s name.

“‘Lo?” I mumbled into the phone.

Fuck, my tongue felt heavy and thick.

“Where are you? It’s almost ten, and Dante is losing his shit because you haven’t answered all night. He went out to look for you and couldn’t find you. What’s going on?”

“I don’t know,” I said, my words slightly slurred. “I guess I’m at the beach and fell asleep.”

“Get home, man. Do you need me to come down there and walk with you back? You sound. . . weird.”

“No. I’m good. I think. I’ll be there in a few minutes.”

“OK.” The anxiousness in Ashes’s voice made my chest twinge the smallest amount, but the rest of me just kept rolling with it.

I disconnected the call and looked back up to the stars.

Something wasn’t right, but maybe I didn’t even know what right was anymore. Maybe I’d felt so wrong for so long that right felt wrong.

It was a confusing thought I just didn’t have the energy to entertain, so I staggered to my feet and began the long shuffle back to the house.

Tomorrow would be a better day.

It was the same lie I’d been telling myself for years.

But with every lie, it held truth. I just had to get the right damn day.

* * *

“Where were you?”Church was in my face the moment I stepped into the house, his green eyes flashing with anger.

“Lake,” I said, exhausted off my ass again. The walk hadn’t done shit for me but made me more confused and tired.

“Call next time. We were out there looking for your ass. I don’t like dragging Sirena around in the cold.” Church gave me a sour look before going into the living room. I took my shoes off and followed him.

“You good?” Ashes asked from his spot on the couch. I sank onto my usual spot and rubbed my eyes.

“New meds,” I muttered. “Fucking me up.”

“Why are you on new meds?” Church demanded. “What’s going on?”

“That’s the problem,” I said, slurring slightly. I rubbed my eyes again, hoping to clear my blurry vision. I felt drugged as fuck. And high. Way high. It almost reminded me of the drug I’d been given in the facility. A lower high, but still fucking high.

I didn’t hate it.

It just felt weird.

It was the heavy feeling. Definitely the heavy feeling that was fucking with me. Like I was two Malachis stuck in one body.

“Why is it the problem?” Church was like a fucking dog with a bone. Relentless.

“Because clearly I’m fucked in the head and need help,” I snapped back at him. “Stop fucking badgering me on it.”