Page 64 of Stitches

“So what’s up with you? You’re being so weird with Rina. Do you want to talk about it?”

“No.”

“But can you admit you are being weird?”

“I can admit that.” I leveled my focus on the rabbit as we passed by. His lips were visible because of the cut of the mask he wore. He gave me a smile that made me frown deeper. He seemed so familiar to me, but I couldn’t place him.

He didn’t say a word as we walked past, but he did turn his head and keep focused on me as we moved away. He gave me the chills, and that was saying something. Any other time I’d have gone to him and pummeled his ass just for breathing too close to me, but call me crazy, I think I was losing my edge. Maybe it was my depression. Or the fucking drugs they had me on. Who knew? I’d let Janice know though. I’d taken the higher dose today already and wasn’t feeling too horrible, although I was finding it harder to connect my emotions. It was like I knew they were there, but they were lost in a bin filled with bullshit, and I was grasping at them, unfamiliar with a new toy.

It didn’t make much sense in my head, so I said fuck it.

She pulled me to a stop and stared up at me. “Talk to me, Malachi.”

I swallowed hard as I stared down at the sincerity on her face. “What could I possibly say to you, Cadence?”

She studied me for a moment before she let out a sigh. “I’ll tell you one truth if you tell me one.”

As much as I wanted to roll my eyes at her and tell her to piss off, I stopped myself. Maybe I needed to say something to make the pain go away.

“OK,” I murmured, giving in.

“I saw Sin bringing Rina home that night.” She stared up at me. “I know you were there too, and I know you haven’t told anyone about it. Do you want to talk about it?”

I looked past her and people watched for a moment.

Did I want to talk about it?

Yes and no.

But really, yes.

“I-I do want to talk about it.”

“So talk. I’ll listen.”

I stood silently for a long time, staring into space, warring with myself about what to say. It was Cady’s hand in mine that brought me back to reality.

“Malachi,” she murmured. “Come on. Talk to me. I’m impartial here, really. I want the best for my sister, and I know you’re struggling. I only want to help.”

I exhaled. “I told Sin to fuck off, basically.”

She nodded and squeezed my hand. “Why haven’t you told the guys?”

I noticed she hadn’t released my hand. It felt good to feel the warmth of human contact, even if it was Cady. I knew it was a comfort thing she was doing because I’d seen her do it with Sirena. While she was all snark, fists, and teeth, Cadence Lawrence was also sweet when she wanted to be, and if it had anything to do at all with Sirena, she was ten times more violent and sweet, depending on the situation.

“And?” She prompted.

“He kissed her. She was out, but he did it. I wanted to fucking kill him, but I held back because I guess I saw the change in him. He’s not the same Sin I used to know. I’m worried he’s broken,” I admitted. “But I saw the love he has for her. He’s finally realized it. He wants to come back.”

“What do you want?”

I was quiet again for a minute, sorting through my thoughts. “I don’t know. I miss him, but I’m so mad at him. Sirena and I both suffered because of him. More her than me. Hell, we all suffered. Even Dante and Asher. Had I not fucked up and tried to kill myself, maybe none of this shit would have happened with her at the facility.” I felt the tear slide down my cheek as she held my hand. I sniffled and wiped hastily at it.

“What happened at the facility?” she asked in a whisper.

“Terrible things,” I managed to say. “Horrible fucking things I’m still trying to work through. Sirena…she…fuck.” I wiped again at my eyes with my free hand. “I tried, OK? I did what I could for her while we were in there. It was all I could do. I’d have killed every motherfucker in that place if I could have. Know that, Cady. Fucking know that someday I will.”

She nodded. “I believe that.”

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