Page 10 of Jep

She opened her emails, scanning through what had come in. There wouldn’t be a lot for her to do right now, which was helpful because it was impossible to concentrate. The others didn’t have the luxury of spinning out or losing focus like she did. She was glad that her heart being in a million pieces wouldn’t put any more lives at risk or disrupt the investigation. But could she have prevented their deaths? Murati had two kids and a husband who would suffer for the rest of their lives for what she couldn’t stop.

She peered over her computer screen at the two agents talking nearby, listening to the details they relayed to each other until her desk phone rang, startling her.

She quickly lifted the handset. “Hi, yes, this is Em Chapman.”

“Can I see you in my office?” It was Gardener.

“I’ll be right there.”

Her gaze lifted as she crossed the room to a large monitor on the wall playing live coverage of the explosion.

She stopped when she saw a covered body being wheeled toward an ambulance. After closing her eyes to erase the image, she continued to Gardener’s office.

“You wanted to see me?” Em said when she entered the room.

“Sit down, please.”

This time, when Em sat, she pressed her back into the seat. She needed the stability of the chair to keep her steady.

Gardener folded her hands on the desk. “I wanted to talk to you about what you brought me earlier.”

If this was what it took for them to take notice of her, it was a high price to pay. “My concerns about the mission? Or the files?”

“Both. It raises some difficult questions.”

“I’ll answer you as best as I can. Whatever I can do to help.”

“Good. Because the way I see it, this has gone one of two ways. Either you had information from an unknown source that you did not share with me, giving you inside knowledge—or it was simply coincidence.”

“I—” Em’s voice caught in her throat for a second. She cleared it. “I would never withhold information. If I had had anything else to share with you, I would have.”

“So you’re saying it was coincidence?”

Em bit down on the inside of her check in an attempt to bolster her confidence, but too much tragedy had happened for her to feel anything but pain. “I don’t believe it was coincidence.”

“Then what was it?”

“I had seen most of what was in the reports. I have access to most of the intel and the details of the operations. I think what happened was that everything I knew came together. I couldn’t find the details in the files, but I interpreted?—”

“Em, let me stop you there. You’ve been with the organization long enough to know that sometimes an operation goes wrong. Agents get killed. It’s part of the job. This is not aprofession devoid of failure or tragedy. But our role as analysts is to make sure we minimize the risk and present the information in a way that is beneficial to the team.”

“Yes. I agree.”

“That’s why, since all you had was a bad feeling, it was nothing more than the two things colliding on the same day. I would bet money that you’ve had similar anxiety on past operations where you knew the risk was high. But when everything turned out okay, you forgot all about it. It’s just that this time, things didn’t turn out okay.”

“I appreciate what you're saying, but?—”

Gardener put her hand up. “If you can promise me that you had no other knowledge of today’s event, and you haven’t been in contact with anyone, then we’re done here. But if you have spoken to someone, this is your last chance to tell me without serious ramifications. Withholding valuable intel on a crime like this would be…irresponsible to say the least. I don’t think I need to remind you that lives were lost today.”

“No. What happened today… I wish I could say that I did know more. I wish I could shed some light on what happened. But I can’t.” Em picked at her fingers. “I wish I could have done something to stop it.”

“With the information we had, there was nothing any of us could have done. Now that we’ve cleared that up, there’s no point focusing on the past.”

“But if I’d?—”

“I was a touch harsh during our last conversation, I know. I admit that. But my impatience is a symptom of the high expectations I have for you. I see you as my protégé of sorts. You could be the future of this task force. Then you will be the one sitting in my seat, and you’ll understand better the difficulty of this position and what it takes to run this side of the department. That team out there needs us to be as sharp as we can be. Welook at the data, analyze it, and bring them clarity and focus to help facilitate their side of the equation. They’re the ones who have to think on their feet and go with their gut instinct in times of chaos and crisis. That’s not our job, Emery. And if I can’t count on you to be objective, then I can’t have you in this role. It’s too dangerous. Do you understand?”

“Yes, ma’am.”

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