Page 78 of Hidden Ascent

“You have a scripture for everything, don’t you?” She laughed at her own stupid joke. “I thought you helped me escape the police station and then Baker. I thought it was you moving mountains to keep me safe, but it turns out all I was doing was jumping out of the frying pan and into the fire.”

She closed her eyes, close to defeat. “Is that what you wanted? I started to believe. I started to hope that maybe you really did care about the details of my life. I thought maybe you wanted to walk with me and lead me. But all along, was I building a false belief about you that you had to destroy? Was I getting too comfortable with this idea that you care? Now you’re setting me straight. Okay. I’ve got it. But for the record, I would have preferred Baker killing me. Jay doing this to me is cruel. At least with Baker, I knew where he stood. He wasn’t two-faced.” She growled. “Actually, he was. And now, I’m talking to myself about which one of them I’d rather die at the hands of. This is what my life is coming to?”

But as reality sank in, she realized it wasn’t Jay’s deceit that hurt the most. It was the way he’d treated her like chattel. If he had been mad at her for thinking he wasn’t a good man and had therefore turned on her, she could have understood. But he’d made it clear that he had no interest in her beyond what he could get for her exchange. She didn’t matter to him at all.

She thought back to how he’d distracted her to put her at ease at the fundraiser. How could that not be real? She had believed him. She had liked everything about him. The way he treated her and how he looked at her. She’d respected his skill and been impressed with how he handled himself. And, yes, when he’d kissed her, shehadliked it.

Her hand went to her mouth where he’d said he could see a twitch. She’d allowed him to know her in a way no one else did, and he’d used it against her.

She kicked the wall too hard and hurt her toe.

“This is stupid. He did what he had to in order to get me to trust him. That’s all. That’s how it works. It’s my own fault for falling for it. There’s no point being mad at him. I should be mad at me.”

She sat down and leaned against the wall. “So, God, I guess I shouldn’t expect another escape from prison?” She waited for a response, but no more scriptures came to mind. “I don’t want to die here. Just so you know.”

After so many assignments she’d accomplished with control and skill, where was that competence now? Here, she was a lost little girl. All she wanted was for God to take her in His arms and tell her it would all be okay. But all she could feel was the cold wall through her shirt.

She was on her own. No one was coming to her rescue.

* * *

“You’re not going to blindfold me?” Jay said as he drove with Simmo through the city.

“What for? We’re not going anywhere secret. You already know where our base of operations is. What’s there to hide?”

“But wearegoing to speak to Sharpe?”

Simmo looked at him out of the corner of his eye. “You worried I’m going to stab you in the back like you did to Isla?”

“It’s an occupational hazard you have to always be ready for. Otherwise, you get caught off guard like she did.”

“That was fun. She was totally shocked. I can’t believe she had no idea. She really trusted you, man.”

“Yes, she did.” Jay sighed. “I really am that good.”

“I can’t believe you got a federal agent to kiss you. You could teach classes.”

“It’s not a skill you can acquire, Simmo. It’s a gift. You either have it or you don’t.”

“Whatever it is, you’ve got nothing to worry about from me. I told Sharpe it’s worth his while to speak with you.”

“Did you have someone look into Isla? Verify that what I said was true?”

“Yeah, and you’re lucky you’re telling the truth.”

“I wouldn’t have brought her in if I wasn’t. I’m not an idiot. And it proves I’m worth taking a risk on.”

“That’s up to Sharpe to decide. But I told him about the twitch.”

“Twitch?”

“Isla’s tell.”

“That was probably more information than he needed.”

“He likes to know people’s weaknesses.”

“I bet he does. What do you think he’ll do with her?”

---