Page 40 of Fool's Bargain

“You are the one she lives for. You are the one I have to thank for such a fresh and powerful vessel. She fought to honor you but will live to honormeonce you are dead!”

“You are notworthyof her honor!” I screamed. “Leave her mind, you vile creature!”

“It’s far too late for that,” Meri said, the voice a grating rasp of something damaged, not the smooth, fine lilt of the nymph I loved. “The funny thing about a war is there is more than enough blood for me to take my fill. It took but two cuts of a blade and a spattered droplet of tainted blood across her lips and her mind was mine. Do you have the stomach to give her your own blood to save her? Will you bind yourself to her that deeply and risk having your own mind corrupted by mine just to try? Oh, but you wish you had already, don’t you? I feel her regret for rejecting your offer. Yes, a blood meld could have protected her but it’s far too late for that now.”

I pushed her away and scrambled back, groping for a weapon but knowing deep in my heart that I’d never be able to raise a blade against her. Even if her mind belonged to Meri now, she was still Pithys somewhere inside. I had to reach her, convince her to fight. She was a Thiasoi just like Meri had been once upon a time. She had power to draw from.

When she lurched up with a bloody sword in hand, I groped blindly in the sand until I felt the cold, slick bite of metal beneath my palm and grabbed hold, seeking out the hilt. Within my mind I reached for Pithys’ spirit past the oily darkness that obscured her from me. There was only the faintest glimmer of her in the farthest reaches of her secret soul—the place we met when we shared our deepest meld. If only we’d shared a blood meld before, she would be easier to reach. She might have even been strong enough to resist Meri’s influence altogether.

“It’s too late for me, Ione. Please don’t let her take you too. Every time her vessel dies, it weakens her. This body is no longer mine. Use that blade to drive it through her heart. Free me from her hold with the blade, and honor me by surviving.”

Tears flowed freely down my cheeks. What I’d heard weren’t merely words, but truths spoken from soul to soul. I wasn’t strong enough or skilled enough to fight this creature and overpower her, either with my mind or a blade, but as she came at me, it was my opening to hurt her. She didn’t see my weapon, buried as it was in the sand beside the dead body that lay beneath me. Wicked triumph blossomed on her face, bloodlust filling her eyes and making my stomach lurch.

I tightened my grip on the hilt of the sword, flexing my arm and readying myself even as she took a step toward me and raised her blade. But Pithys’ consciousness flashed in that dead gaze for just an instant, and I lost my resolve to end her life.

Instead of grabbing the hilt of the weapon I’d found, I sliced my hand along the blade, gasping at the searing pain that shot up my arm. Then in a fluid motion I lurched up, caught her against the shoulder, and slammed my bloody palm to her mouth.

“Pithys, please fight her. Take my blood. Use it for strength. Together we can banish her evil from your mind. Please!”

A tiny surge of victory burned in my chest when her tongue darted out and touched the bleeding cut. The black depths of her pupils shrank, revealing the familiar blue I loved.Yes, my love, I silently prayed.Fight her.But too soon the blackness returned, obliterating that light entirely.

“She doesn’t love you enough. She never did,” the foreign voice sneered.

She might as well have plunged her blade into my chest, yet her seconds of gloating gave me time to find the dagger in the sand once more. This time I gripped the hilt and pulled, freeing it from beneath the body that held it down.

I hated myself in that second, but Pithys’ voice pleaded one last time, her agony as sharp as any blade. Before Meri could finish me off, I attacked, lifting the hidden dagger with all my strength and aiming the point at her chest. The blade struck true, the tip parting Pithys’ armor and piercing her heart. My own heart shattered when the look in her eyes cleared and filled with nothing but utter gratitude for the release I’d granted. She was free, but I was broken. I fell into the bloody sand wailing, my soul torn apart by what I’d done.

* * *

“Zarya!”

Hands shook me gently then a pair of strong arms wrapped around me. I blinked through hot tears, shaking with the pain and grief of a loss so great it broke my heart. The scent of blood mixed with salty surf still filled my nose, but soon it was replaced by Theo’s juniper aroma.

“Wh-what happened?” I sniffled and looked up at him, confused and disoriented by the shift in surroundings. He held me cradled on his lap and Ione sat beside him, her face stricken with worry.

“Ione’s memory became yours,” Theo said.

“Zarya, I’m so sorry.” She leaned close and pressed her forehead to mine. I closed my eyes and took a shaky breathy, reaching out for her hand. With the contact I eventually regained my sense of self, and understood that what I’d seen was not my reality. It was hers.

“I’m the one who’s sorry,” I whispered. “I had no idea you lost someone. It was recent too. I don’t blame you for holding back, Ione.” My voice cracked at the memory. Despite knowing it wasn’t mine, I felt every moment of it, and it was more soul shattering than any of the trials I’d endured in my own life.

Ione squeezed my hand and gave me a sad smile. “I’d asked her to share a blood meld before but she’d turned me down. I always believed she simply wasn’t ready, despite what Meri said. I never thought it was because the love wasn’t there. Please promise me you will be honest if you don’t return the love I have for you.”

I was speechless, too shaken by what we’d just shared and uncertain about the future to ease her worries, yet wanting to cry out that all I wanted was contained within this room. In my past, love might have been a ludicrous suggestion, but my entire world had been reshaped since meeting Deva Rainsong and forgiving Bodhi for the pain he’d caused. Love was already a given.

Theo stroked my hair back from my temple with one hand, doing the same to Ione with his other. She didn’t react, watching me with raw, almost desperate hope.

“You can have that choice with the rest of us, Zarya,” Theo said. “You and I may be blood melded now, but that doesn’t have to be the case with all of us. You experienced that meld so deeply, it might be safer if you wait a while though.”

“I own my choices,” I said. “And I have no regrets about what I shared with you, even as impulsive as it was. I want more with all of you, but you’re right. I think I need to pace myself for the sake of my sanity.” I leaned forward and kissed Ione gently, then pulled back, my gaze fixed to hers. Through our meld I blasted all the hope and love I had so there would be no question in her mind that I returned her feelings, even though I wasn’t ready yet for what I knew she longed for.

“I was impulsive with you,” I said to Theo. “Reckless even. I don’t think you would disagree. I get the sense what you and I shared is moving fast even for you.” I paused and he didn’t disagree so I went on. “I think I need time to acclimate to each of you with what we’ve shared already before I can share myself deeper with all of you.”

Dorian sighed, and he and Kyril shared a worried glance. Ione scowled at them. “She didn’t say no, did she?” she snapped. Then more hesitantly she looked at me, asking, “You didn’t, did you?”

I shook my head. “I didn’t say no. Is there an issue?”

Dorian pressed his lips together and shook his head. “It’s likely nothing. But you should know the three of us were called to you via different means than Ione was. As a result, there is a chance we’ve pissed off someone very powerful. A blood meld would simply ensure our bond is recognized in the eyes of all the gods—that we won’t be separated.”

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