Page 204 of Surprisingly Us

I shake my head, words forming in my brain to assure him that it wasn’t anything we could have controlled, but that’s when I see it in his eyes. Guilt.

My eyes narrow. “What didn’t you mean to happen?” I ask, my words even and measured, nothing like the hurricane of emotion that is threatening beneath the surface as I start to process Jerrod’s words.

“I hired a photographer to follow you and then once you became involved, Colette as well. But the guy went rogue. Once the media outlets were clamoring for more information, more photos, I couldn’t control him.”

He registers my moment of understanding and takes a step back, but I’m quicker.

I don’t think, I only react.

My hands grab his shoulders, pushing him back until he’s up against the wall.

“It was never—” he starts, but my forearm across his neck cuts him off.

His fingers claw at my arm, but the adrenaline in my body from his confession is too much for him to contend with. The knowledge that Jerrod hired a photographer to follow me andLettie, and that same photographer was the one that had her running when she got hurt tonight, has me seeing more than red. I’m nearly blacked out with rage.

“You fucking piece of shit.” My free fist meets his stomach. His knees buckle and I release my forearm, letting his doubled-over body collapse to the floor.

Holding his side, gasping for air, he admits, “I was trying to expose your relationship. I thought it was fake.”

“Come on, Jerrod. Where’s your photographer now? This is what you were after, right? You want me to look bad in front of the board, well kicking your ass should do it.”

Jerrod staggers to his feet, and I should be done, but another landed punch, this one square in his face, feels too gratifying.

As blood sprays from Jerrod’s nose, somewhere behind me, a woman screams. Hospital security will probably be here any minute.

He wipes at his nose. It’s probably broken now. How many bones are in a human nose? The body for that matter? I have no idea, but I figure it’s one down, only several hundred to go.

“Rhys!” Hannah yells from the doorway of Lettie’s room. “Stop!”

I release the fist that is curled into the front of Jerrod’s shirt, and he staggers backward, placing a hand on the wall to steady himself.

I’m so fucking tired. Of trying to prove myself. Of molding myself into who others think I should be. I want Lettie, and I want to be a good person, and I hate that I let Jerrod pull me into this ugly game with him.

“Stay the fuck away from me and Colette.” I stagger backwards, the adrenaline from fighting Jerrod starting to wane.

“Everyone cared more about you,” he calls.

I should ignore him and walk away but I find myself turning back.

“What?”

“Your parents died and everyone was there for you. My family fell apart but I never got the sympathy you did, I couldn’t compete.”

“That’s fucked up. It was never a competition to see who could get more sympathy.”

“It wasn’t only that. Your parents treated me like their own. When my mom went to rehab, and I spent time at Lake George with you, I was jealous of your family. I saw what it was like to have loving, supportive parents.”

“Then I lost them.”

“Yeah, I lost them, too.”

For the first time, Jerrod’s mask falls and I see the hurt and insecurity behind it. I’d never thought of him hurting from my parents’ death. That he’d also lost their guidance and love. And even though he hadn’t lost his parents, they weren’t what mine had been to him.

I stare at him, now bloody and bruised. My anger has dissipated, but I’m still processing what he shared and how I feel about it.

A security guard shows up to escort me off the premises.

“Hannah, tell Lettie I’ll be waiting for her outside.”