Page 3 of Blackmailed to the Altar

Dr. Mya Rivers

United States

“No,you’re making it sound like you are a superhero,” I laughed.

My long-time friend, and little from my sorority days back in college, Nina Torres, sat across from me in my office. It had taken some time to get established on this campus, but now the school trusted me implicitly.

“I’m not saying I need a cape, I’m just telling you, I’m sponsoring one girl from Alpha Kappa Nocturne, and she is wild.” She dragged a hand through her blonde locks. “Eso es lo que hay.” She waved a small hand in front of her face.

“I don’t know what that means, chiquita.” I smirked.

Nina was always teaching me new phrases in Spanish. I just didn’t have the best affinity for the language myself. Being a military brat, we moved around a ton, until that fateful day I’d been thrown away by my progenitors. A flash of the dark hole I’d been thrown into as a child floated across my mind, but I breathed out slowly.

“It means ‘it is what it is’.” We shared a fond smile as I took notice of Nina’s outfit today, the loud colors keeping me calm. I searched for something else to focus on, as the scent of dankness from the past smothered me in the present.

I looked at the time. I needed Nina to get out of my office on time so I could break down alone. What could I smell? Nina’s perfume filled the air as she moved her box braids over her shoulder.

“Our time is almost up, let’s get back to the problem at hand.” I blew out a sigh, ready to hit her with reality. “You need to get real with yourself. What’s really going on in that head of yours?” I tried to shake off the past and focus on her here and now.

“It’s like, no matter what I do, nothing is there.” Nina folded her arms over her chest in a huff. “I’ve dated. I’ve put myself out there, butnada.”

My therapist cap was on. “So this isn’t just about searching for a guy.” I was getting to the root of her issue. She wasn’t broken like she said every session she had with me. She just wasn’t connecting with potential dates.

“No, my heart is on airplane mode, and I can’t just share my body with anyone. It’s my first time, and while I shouldn’t want it to be special at my age, shouldn’t it?”

I tilted my head, considering her words. “Have you ever thought it’s less about the guys, and more about how you feel about yourself?”

“Ugh, don’t go too psychoanalysis on me,Dr. Mya. I’m already a basket case without you peeling back the layers of my messed-up psyche.”

I held up a placating hand, realizing I’d unintentionally touched a nerve. “Let’s stop here for today. You still have to get ready for your date.”

Nina blew out a sigh of relief, which let me know I was making the right decision to end early. “Same time next week?”

I nodded, walking her out. “Of course. Call me after your date and let me know how it went.”

“I will. See you later, Big.” She gave me a small hug.

“After a while, Little.” I watched as she walked out of the door, leaning against the wall. As soon as she was out of view, I let go of a shaky breath.

I’d known Nina for a long time, and while she was older than me, our situation was unique. We met at Alpha Kappa Nocturne, when she was rushing as an undergrad. I became her mentor, and through that we forged a bond like no other, despite our slight age difference. Now she was the house mother to our sorority, and I couldn’t be prouder.

I hoped she found what she was looking for. There was no drug on Earth that could help Nina feel the connection she was searching for with a man. At first, I thought she was looking at the wrong gender, but that’s not the case.

She could not be intimate with a partner.

Like Nina, I wasn’t able to reach an intimate level of trust with a partner. I may be a genius to some, but I still felt like that little girl strapped down to the bed, screaming for help, sometimes. My progenitors dumped me with him for almost a year, before they dragged me back into the light, and accelerated classes. With tutors, and no sleep, I was able to rise to the top at an early age and get into an excellent college. The blood money they received, a price I paid with my virginity, helped too.

I sank to the floor and let go of all the negative images that had been pulled out of the box in the back of my mind. A few tears leaked out as I shuddered through the dark memories of my childhood. I was labeled as crazy when I tried to speak out, and couldn’t tolerate being intimate with someone that would turn on me for my past in a moment.

I calmed my breathing, until I only had small hiccups left in between breaths. Men couldn’t be trusted. All they did wasuse and abuse. Just like him. That was why my programs were geared toward broken men who the system let slip through the cracks. Pedophiles and abusers, those that shouldn’t see the light of day.

I prevented them from reoffending with my concoctions, and I couldn’t have another breakdown. I had to be strong. I was, I knew I was, but sometimes I felt brittle. I shook it off, finished my box breathing, and got my ass in gear.

As I packed up my bag, ready to head out, I waved to some of the staff from the university. Many were gone for the day, and the sun had already sunk below the horizon. I hated leaving at this time of night, but my new office wasn’t finished being built yet, so I made do with what the university offered me.

I cursed myself as I reached the parking garage. My feet hurt from the painful heels I was wearing, and the elevators in the garage itself were being worked on, so I couldn’t use them. I made my way up the stairs. This wasn’t the worst thing I’d been through. I’d been sold at a young age for profit. My progenitors abandoned me for almost a year, until they had the bright idea to use me as a cash cow in the media. As their only genius child, I raked a ton of money in for the family once I started making magazine covers. My brain saved me from that hellhole. I was a survivor. Stairs wouldn’t beat me tonight, even though I struggled up them.

This hadn’t seemed so bad this morning when I was all pepped up on coffee. But now that it was the end of the day, my twenty-seven year old knees couldn’t hang. I panted slowly up the steps from hell.

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