The half face mask didn’t cover all of my scars, and the staring was something I’d had to grow used to. For most of my life, since the fire, I tried to avoid crowded spaces as much as possible.
It would be worth it.
For Laura.
The supermarket’s lights glared above me, and row after row of colourful items stretched out seemingly endlessly. A tremble made my fingers quake when I reached out for one of the packets, picking it up and feeling the squishy contents within. The gummy worms weren’t at all nutritious. A waste of money, really. Frivolous.Perfect.
Throwing the jellied sweets into the trolley began anavalanche of food stuffs. Things I remembered loving from my childhood, like chocolate mice and tiny icing covered biscuits. Packet after packet of items I’d never even heard of but would love to taste. Pizza flavoured crisps. Wine flavoured sweets. BBQ ramen noodles.
After almost an hour and a stuffed trolley, I reined myself in. The trolley was teeming with nothing but junk food, and my fiery little ember would need some real food. Never in my life had I had to actually shop and cook actual meals.
The cool pack of burgers I picked up chilled the tips of my fingers as I scanned the back. Fry until cooked through. I could do that for her. My mouth watered at the distant memory of melted cheese and seasoned patties my dad would cook on the barbeque in the summer.
Damn. I’d have loved to taste even one more bite.
Almost as much as I longed to taste Laura.
Being near her drove me insane. The way her nose scrunched in distaste at the shakes made my heart want to explode in my chest. The little snores she gave off in the night. Her soft hair clinging to my chest in the middle of the night when she was too deep in the unconscious to remember to be mad at me. When she’d sung along to my violin I’d been hit with a hundred more poisoned darts that inflamed my desire for her a thousand-fold. I wanted to hear her cry my name out in that pretty sing-song voice of hers.
My thumb was digging into the minced beef patties through the cellophane as I lost myself in Laura. The supermarket dimmed, so inconsequential compared to even the smallest thought of her.
I had to make her mine.
To show her I would worship her like no other man ever would.
To torment her body in ways that would leave her never wanting to be anywhere but at my feet.
Someone cleared their throat, dragging me right back into the supermarket with a sharp bump. The elderly woman glanced down at my crotch, her eyes widening.
Shit.
The thoughts of Laura on her knees had made me hard, and to the other patrons it must have looked every bit like I had a chub on for fucking hamburgers.
I tossed the pack of burgers into the cart before winking at the old woman and walking past her, very much trying to ignore the glances from others at my crotch.
After piling some vegetables and fruit into the cart, I stopped next to a basket of the shiniest, reddest apples I’d ever seen. Would Laura like them?
That damned pony would.
And Laura liked the pony.
And I wanted to make her smile so fucking badly.
With a sigh, I scooped an armful of the apples up and dumped them into the cart.
Stupid bloody pony better at least let me pet him.
Or Laura might beg me to pet her…
My muscles spasmed as I wrangled the stuffed carrier bags into the cottage. The birds chittered above the front door in their early morning sing-song, adding to the blissful quiet of the day. Having been back in the busyness of the real world always made me appreciate the isolation of the island. However hard it had been being stuck there with my uncle, at least there was no one to stare at my ugly, deformed face. No gasps or children pointing. No mothers pulling toddlers out of my path or people asking what happened.
At least on the island it was only me.
And Laura, now.
Flexing my fingers to stretch out the cramp from the bag's indents, I walked through to the sitting room. Laura’s pretty face pressed against her arm in the worn old armchair, her mouth open a little. Her breath was soft against the woollen blanket that covered her.
My sweet girl hadn’t been able to go to bed without me. A bloom of pleasure filtered through me. I stepped closer to her sleeping form and slowly dragged my thumb over her bottom lip.