Page 27 of Burn for Me

Hot tears filled my eyes and I lashed out at the tree, catching my knuckles on the rough bark. Frustration fuelled my strikes and I didn’t let up until my knuckles were bloody. Stumbling along the ridge, I found myself standing on one of the low cliffs, looking out over the never ending sea.

No-one was going to come for me.

Phoenix must have let me run, knowing there was nowhere to go.

My feet carried me to the edge of the grass topped cliff. Dizziness swept through me at the sight of the sea crashing into the rocks far below.

Just jump.

It could all be over so quickly. I was supposed to die in the fire, and what was the point of continuing? To be Phoenix’s toy? Then what? Wait until he grows bored of me and hope for release? Yeah, right. He’d be more likely to bury me on this remote island where no-one would ever find me.

What if he left me there? Alone.

The tears came heavy, cascading down my cheeks until my hoodie grew sodden around my neck. I took another step closer to the edge, my toes no longer on the solid ground. Fear strangled my sobs and I closed my eyes, ready.

It would be quick.

I hoped.

Peace filled me, and I let a tiny smile cross my lips.

A snicker pulled me from my reverie, making me look down as panic swept up and filled me. I stumbled backward.

Fuck.

I’d almost done it.

I collapsed against the grass, throwing myself downward and letting the sobs take over. Curling into a foetal position, I let all of the pent up anguish escape. Tears gave way to sobs, and sobs gave way to desperate cries that sounded alien even to myself.

Death keeps coming so close, but I keep narrowly missing it. It has to be better than staying with Phoenix.

I jolted as something soft and warm nudged my neck. I’d been so lost in my near jump, I hadn’t noticed another creature sharing the space with me.

A short pony stood above me, the heat from its nostrils blowing through my hair as it curiously sniffed me.

A surprised laugh erupted from my mouth, and a delirium filled me. The pony didn’t seem to mind, it moved down to sniff along my neckline.

Pulling myself to sit, I reached out and stroked the velvety soft skin of its nose.

‘Well, hi,’ I crooned, sniffling down snot and tears. The pony let me take what I needed, as if it was some magical beast sent by the universe itself in a moment where I needed someone kind more than anything else.

‘I don’t suppose you have a phone?’ I said through a tortured chuckle. The pony thrust its head against my chest, nudging me. I gave it a rub along the jaw and sighed. ‘Guess not. But this’ll do.’

Wind swept up over the cliff face, whipping my hair around us.

‘At least I’m not the only one stuck here,’ I whispered, pressing my face into the soft fur of the pony’s neck.

We could be companions in our desolation.

FIFTEEN

Phoenix

Footsteps crunching in the gravel, followed by cursing, announced Laura’s arrival at the cottage.

Her mad dash into the trees was neither unexpected nor an issue. There was nowhere for her to go, and I had the keys to the boat's engine in my pocket. After being cooped up in the cabin for days, I couldn’t blame her seeking her freedom.

There was no freedom to be found on my tiny piece of paradise. The cottage was the one place in the world where I could usually ditch my mask and live as if I wasn’t some scarred freak. No-one to gawk at me. No-one to whisper and point. No-one to talk to or expect a reply. The sheep didn’t care for me to talk to them anyway.

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