I dropped my gaze to my uneaten food and sighed. “Yeah. Come to my room around three,” I offered. That should give me enough time to clean up and shower before the fight tonight and before she showed up.
“Oh okay, sure.” She forced a smile before turning her back and making her way over to her group of friends.
Picking up my cheeseburger, I took my first bite. The meat tasted plain and dry—a side-effect of coming down, but if I didn’t eat, I’d feel sick all day. Forcing myself to swallow, I took a swig of my Gatorade to help wash it down.
“You’re not going to get back together with her, are you?” Foster questioned, raising an accusing eyebrow. I knew he didn’t like Jess, so his opinion was completely biased, but I had no interest in continuing that toxic cycle.
“No. Might fuck her though.” I smirked. “God knows I need something to ease this tension.”
Myles laughed. “Can I play with her when you’re done?” An evil glint sparkled within his eyes, telling me that fucking her was the last thing on his mind. A shiver wracked my body at the thought of handing her to him on a silver platter. Luckily, Foster answered for me.
“No dickwad, we have to keep a low profile for now.”
Myles scoffed, rolling his eyes as if that was the least of his worries. I questioned the way his mind worked. All he seemed to think about was violence and pain. Sometimes, I found myself thinking about it too. The way it felt to have Aspen at my mercy was like a rush no drug has ever been able to grant me. The way it felt, knowing I’d been the one to break her. I wanted her back, just so I could do it all over again—minus the killing part.
My hands flexed beneath the table as my mind haunted me with flashbacks from that night. She’d been so beautiful covered in blood, and when she begged….
Fuck.
My dick hardened at the memory. That’s probably been the first time it’s gotten hard in over two weeks. Then again, I haven’t really messed with it much.
After lunch, the first thing I did was shower. The water warmed my skin, painting my flesh red. Tilting my head back, I allowed it to cascade down every inch of my body. After finishing up, I dried off and got dressed with a couple hours to spare. Knowing Jess, she’d probably show up early, so if I wanted to clean before she got here then the time to do it was now.
Grabbing a trash bag, I got to work. I placed all the empty bottles and trash in it, organized my weed stash onto a tray and placed it on the top shelf of my closet. I hid the bottles of pills in my sock drawer and placed the unfinished bottles of alcohol in my closet as well, closing the door behind me.
The room still wasn’t perfect, but it looked like a normal room now. As if right on cue, a knock sounded at my bedroom door, sending tension coiling around my muscles.
Might as well get this shit over with.
Striding across the room, I opened the door. Jessica’s flowery-scented perfume immediately ambushed me as she looked up at me with a sense of longing. Unfortunately, the only thing this girl had going for her was her looks, and eventually, that would fade, and she’d be left with nothing aside from a shitty attitude.
“Come in,” I offered, stepping away from the door so she had room to enter.
With no sign of hesitation, she entered, pulling the door closed behind her. Jessica’s gaze tracked around my room as if she hadn’t seen it in months, when in reality, it hadn’t been that long at all.
I drifted over to the bed and sat on the edge, motioning for her to join me. Slowly, she took the invitation, leaving a mere foot of space between us.
“You wanted to talk,” I reminded her.
She nodded and shifted her body toward me so that we were facing each other. “The truth is…I think I overreacted.” My eyebrows rose into my hairline. That had been the last thing I expected her to say. “It was just a shock, you know? I should have been willing to hear you out rather than just believing that slut. Now that she’s missing, she can’t come between us again, and I miss you, Hunter.”
I was silent for a few moments, trying to process everything she just said. In other words, she kept her distance from me because in her mind, I couldn’t be trusted around Aspen.
“What do you miss exactly?” I challenged, quirking an eyebrow. “Controlling me? Bullying girls who I glance at for a millisecond? Being my arm candy? What the fuck do youmissabout us? Because from where I’m sitting, we never had much to begin with.”
Jessica’s lips parted in shock, pain slicing through her from the harshness of my words. They weren’t intended to hurt her, but it was true. We might have gotten along at one point, but things changed drastically since then. I couldn’t even remember what it felt like to actually be happy with her.
“Are you saying that what we had wasn’t special?” she countered. “You don’t miss me at all?”
All thoughts about fucking her vanished. I needed to rip it off like a band aid. It might have taken me a while, but I’ve finally outgrown her. I didn’t want to be controlled anymore, and the fights were ridiculous, having an ever-lasting effect on my mental health.
“That’s exactly what I’m saying. I’m sorry, Jess.”
Abruptly, she stood. Her eyes were glazed over with unshed tears and her lightly baked skin appeared flushed from either anger, sadness, or a mixture of both. For once, I couldn’t find it in me to give a shit either way. I was emotionally spent and justwanted to relax before the fight later. After that, I planned on drowning myself in alcohol and drugs again. It seemed to be my only escape lately.
“You’re seeing someone else already, aren’t you?” she demanded, her voice cracking at the end.
I rolled my eyes. “No. I just haven’t been happy with you in a long time. Everyone seemed to notice it except for you. That’s part of the problem.”